VegemiteGrrl's Home for the Absent-Minded

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At least the chicken was spared!

One of my old apartments had a tiny kitchen and I invited people over for dinner, which included corn on the cob, and having nothing else to do with the plate of spent cobs (why didn't I throw them away, I am wondering now) I stuck them in the oven where I completely forgot about them until a couple months later when I preheated the oven for something. But that's less about being absent minded and more about how rarely I cooked.

Lawyer... SUAVE... (carl agatha), Tuesday, 27 August 2013 13:25 (ten years ago) link

Once I left beets roasting in the oven overnight. The smell next morning is not a smell I ever want to smell again.

ljubljana, Tuesday, 27 August 2013 21:39 (ten years ago) link

:(

Lawyer... SUAVE... (carl agatha), Tuesday, 27 August 2013 21:40 (ten years ago) link

D:

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 27 August 2013 21:40 (ten years ago) link

Went to a really nice hotel in Toronto with Mrs Chuck and had a much-needed relax in the downstairs sauna and steam room.

Then -- I know, I'll turn the shower tap on and get some cold water in here -- OUCH WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS THIS TAP BURNING ME??? Maybe because it's not the shower tap but the steam nozzle I just saw ALL THE HOT STEAM COME OUT OF THIRTY SECONDS AGO.

The burn's mostly gone down now :/

Chuck_Tatum, Tuesday, 27 August 2013 22:08 (ten years ago) link

last weekend I exceeded past performance. classic absentminded 10 from the swedish judges.

I was making a pot of coffee. I put the beans in the grinder, but almost as soon as they started grinding I was thinking to myself, I really should have filled the coffee maker up with water first. (not that it matters but suddenly this was very important thought in my head)

when the beans were done grinding I promptly dumped the container of coffee grounds into the water reservoir of the coffee maker.

;_;

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 9 September 2013 20:29 (ten years ago) link

This made me think of this thread:

BC News presenter goes on screen with wad of A4 sheets after mistaking it for iPad

Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 19 September 2013 15:19 (ten years ago) link

hi guys i missed my second flight of the year on sunday

it was definitely not my fault though (stansted express fuckery) and i was with a colleague so no stress really

lex pretend, Thursday, 19 September 2013 15:28 (ten years ago) link

Bought some jeans from the Gap without trying them on ("well, they're my size, that'll do"), came home with a pair of women's super skinny pants.

Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 19 September 2013 15:35 (ten years ago) link

I hope I someday can miss a flight and not feel stressed about it. You have a gift, Lex! I'm such an anxious flier (it's not even the whole flying part - it's all the hassle and bullshit leading up to the plane taking off) that I don't think it will ever happen.

carl agatha, Thursday, 19 September 2013 15:37 (ten years ago) link

Once I left beets roasting in the oven overnight. The smell next morning is not a smell I ever want to smell again.
― ljubljana, Tuesday, 27 August 2013 21:39 (3 weeks ago) Permalink

Did a similar thing years ago, leaving a burner on overnight. Thinking it was off, I'd laid an Ikea plastic chopping board on it. Came into the kitchen the next morning, to no odor (oddly) but with a glowing burner and a melted scalloped board. Led me to saying out loud "off, off, off..." whenever I use the stove and am done with the burners or oven.

the body of a spider... (scampering alpaca), Thursday, 19 September 2013 15:42 (ten years ago) link

One time at work, I was in the toilet and my mobile fell off my belt (where it was clipped on, this was a while ago so back in the lol hueg phone days). It bounced off the rim of the toilet seat and... onto the floor instead of into the toilet. I bent down to pick it up and my tie went into the bowl, soaking the bottom three inches.

came the time he flipped his lid came the time he flipped his lid (snoball), Thursday, 19 September 2013 15:55 (ten years ago) link

On the boat back to Dublin for the w/e after 3 weeks at my new job in Engerland.....and I've just now realised that I left my bleak rented room this morning, full of the joys of seeing my friends......without my Irish mobile. So I have almost no useful phone numbers and nobody can get in touch because they don't have my UK # (I have THAT phone with me)

Fine Toothcomb (sonofstan), Friday, 20 September 2013 04:13 (ten years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Get glass out of kitchen cupboard. Fill glass with water. Return glass to the cupboard while still full of water. Spend half an hour looking for glass. End.

Chuck_Tatum, Friday, 11 October 2013 10:55 (ten years ago) link

I'm such an anxious flier (it's not even the whole flying part - it's all the hassle and bullshit leading up to the plane taking off) that I don't think it will ever happen.

You are me. It's any form of travel, not just flying, but flying amps all the hassle right up with all the extra stages, extra security, extra complications (and long waits) to get the next one if you miss your flight, etc.

Autumnal dumb: my credit card co. sent me a new card 6 weeks before the old one expired and I thought "I'll put this in a safe place" and then I also thought "no I won't, I'll never find it if I do that" and now, duh, the old one's expired and I can't find it and I don't know if the "safe place" or the "leave it on the nearest flat surface" thought won out.

(I didn't want to put it in my wallet right away for reasons that now seem kind of dumb: I was going on holiday and trying to make space for Euros and health insurance ID)

Those actually seem like perfectly legitimate reasons to me!

carl agatha, Friday, 11 October 2013 13:16 (ten years ago) link

I guess so but I'm now thinking "oh wow, you saved a millimetre-wide strip of space for a week at the expense of how many hours spent looking for the card afterwards?", etc.

Might still phone up and claim I never received it. Like I already did with a chequebook last year. Does this make me a bad person? I'll just have to be a bad person.

I looked up a phone number on a website and then sat here and waited for the call to magically occur for about 15 seconds before I realized that I needed to take the additional step of dialing the phone myself.

carl agatha, Friday, 11 October 2013 15:57 (ten years ago) link

That is maybe not so much absent minded as thinking I live in a magical future world where I can dial phones with my mind. I think that's a feature due to be released with iOS 9.

carl agatha, Friday, 11 October 2013 15:58 (ten years ago) link

Have done this, but by selecting a number from a cell phone, then holding it to my hear expectantly without having pushed the button to place the call. Then studied the number very carefully to ascertain what went wrong.

ljubljana, Saturday, 12 October 2013 20:37 (ten years ago) link

Get glass out of kitchen cupboard. Fill glass with water. Return glass to the cupboard while still full of water. Spend half an hour looking for glass. End.

― Chuck_Tatum, Friday, October 11, 2013 10:55 AM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Isn't time spent looking for lost liquidful glasses stressful? Or is that just when one has a tendency to put such things on the ground?

the tint-shifted anigif from DOWNTOWN ABBEY (fake penthouse letters mcgee), Saturday, 12 October 2013 20:43 (ten years ago) link

xp That's not so much absent-mindedness, more like mobile phone interfaces being opaque, unclear and inconsistent about what will happen when you tap on something. Example: the 'contacts' list on my mobile only dials the number if I tap the contact name and then tap 'dial'. But on the 'missed calls' list, if I tap the contact name it dials the number straight away.

not a lunch that is hot (snoball), Saturday, 12 October 2013 20:44 (ten years ago) link

Exonerated :D ...till next time.

ljubljana, Saturday, 12 October 2013 21:16 (ten years ago) link

Veg, do you like the band the Living End?

Mordy , Tuesday, 15 October 2013 01:10 (ten years ago) link

I do! Not as familiar with their later-period stuff, but I was way into them when they first popped up

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 15 October 2013 01:31 (ten years ago) link

when i was a teenager i loved w/ the roll on album (which i found out about from loveline w/ adam corolla + dr drew). UNCLE HARRY PISSING IN THE BATH OOO OOO PISSING IN THE BATH.

Mordy , Tuesday, 15 October 2013 01:32 (ten years ago) link

three weeks pass...

There's a bottle of Coke in the work fridge and I can't remember if it's mine. I think it might be but I don't want to steal someone else's drink.

If this sounds reasonably normal then please note that I went to the fridge today thinking "I vaguely remember buying a Coke yesterday, I'll check the fridge" but when I actually reached the fridge and saw it there I totally couldn't remember buying it at all. I THINK I'M LOSING MY MIND.

the supreme personality of Godhead : a summary study (a passing spacecadet), Wednesday, 6 November 2013 14:14 (ten years ago) link

I remember seeing a sandwich in our work fridge that never got eaten, until finally you could see the bread becoming green through the paper wrapping. I got angrier and angrier at the jerk who didn't keep up with his stuff in the common fridge until one day I remembered it was my sandwich. I had bought a 12" one on a Friday and left the uneaten half at work with the idea that I would have it Monday (why take it home only to bring it back?). If this had been any other day of the week I would have remembered but the weekend gap (may have been a 3-day weekend) was just long enough to erase it from my mind.

nickn, Wednesday, 6 November 2013 17:05 (ten years ago) link

I have had that too! I bought some frozen burritos from TJ's once, and I thought I had eaten them but then one lunchtime I just grabbed one out of the freezer and had it for lunch and for the rest of the afternoon I was racked with guilt OH NO I ATE SOMEONE ELSES LUNCH THAT WASN'T MINE and then the other one sat there for a week and then I realized oh wait maybe they were mine after all

the exciting life of a crazyperson

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 6 November 2013 17:25 (ten years ago) link

Whew, it's not just me. I don't know how I went within 2 minutes from "vaguely remember buying a Coke, is there one...?" to "I don't remember buying a Coke in the past week and I have never seen this bottle before" though.

If it's still there in a few days I'll declare it mine, and hope not to see an email to the all-staff list going "I have diabetes and had a near-fatal blood sugar crash after someone stole my bottle of Coke, who would be so rude and thoughtless?!" or sth

the supreme personality of Godhead : a summary study (a passing spacecadet), Wednesday, 6 November 2013 17:42 (ten years ago) link

Somewhere/time between walking into my work building this morning and lunchtime today, I lost some treasured left-overs. I remember holding the bag of empanadas in my right hand as I got on the elevator, but it was missing from my life 3 hours later. I didn't leave the building and my boss was the only one there all morning w/ me and I know she didn't eat them. What the hell did I do w/ that bag of empanadas??

disgruntled punter (Je55e), Thursday, 7 November 2013 01:27 (ten years ago) link

I predict you will find them somewhere hilarious in a week or so.

carl agatha, Thursday, 7 November 2013 01:32 (ten years ago) link

^^^

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 7 November 2013 02:45 (ten years ago) link

I looked in so many hilarious places though. What's the MOST hilarious place in an office?

disgruntled punter (Je55e), Thursday, 7 November 2013 03:50 (ten years ago) link

Your butt.

Jeff, Thursday, 7 November 2013 03:57 (ten years ago) link

tee hee

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 7 November 2013 04:07 (ten years ago) link

There it was the whole time.

disgruntled punter (Je55e), Friday, 8 November 2013 14:50 (ten years ago) link

I've suddenly developed this thing where I get in the shower, go to shampoo my hair, and can't remember whether I already did.

ljubljana, Saturday, 9 November 2013 03:01 (ten years ago) link

i'm convinced leave in conditioner was invented by an absent minded person. i have forgotten to rinse many times

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 9 November 2013 03:06 (ten years ago) link

wrote up two sandwich orders at the sandwich deli I go to every saturday. When I go, I normally I write up an order for me, and one for Mr Veg, and put my name on both.

so on Saturday they call my first sandwich. and I stand there waiting for them to call my second sandwich. i stand there and stand there until I know something's wrong and that maybe they've misplaced my orders. there's sandwiches on the counter for other people, but they haven't called another sharon.

so I ask the guy, hey do you have a sandwich order of (x) description under my name? the guy looks through the orders and says, no we don't have anything. someone may have taken yours. we have the same sandwich up here, but it's for (different name, not mine).

I pause a moment. and then I was like, um that's my husband's name and that's my handwriting, I must have spaced and put it under his name.

*scurries away meekly*

I was so embarrassed.

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 18 November 2013 21:34 (ten years ago) link

one month passes...

I bought a new padlock for the pool changing rooms, because I hate having to remember the combination on the one I currently have. I started resetting it to a combination I'd remember, screwed up the number of turns left/right, and for some reason LOCKED IT rather than using the reset key and starting again. I now own a paperweight.

ljubljana, Thursday, 16 January 2014 22:36 (ten years ago) link

:(

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 January 2014 01:45 (ten years ago) link

what kind of lock is it? it used to be that 20-30% of the internet was devoted to cracking locks.

Philip Nunez, Friday, 17 January 2014 01:54 (ten years ago) link

that got taken over by cats fyi

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 January 2014 01:59 (ten years ago) link

Master Lock. In hot pink.

ljubljana, Friday, 17 January 2014 03:20 (ten years ago) link

http://hackaday.com/2009/10/06/how-to-crack-a-master-lock/

Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 22 January 2014 19:40 (ten years ago) link

I'll give it a go!

ljubljana, Thursday, 23 January 2014 02:00 (ten years ago) link

I was thinking about some half-remembered quote today, something like "I will allow fear to pass through me and when it's gone I will remain" and I was trying to figure out where it was from, thinking that it was some US president or other. Then I Googled it and it's the second half of the Litany Against Fear, from the sci-fi novel 'Dune'. Well at least it didn't turn out to be something from Star Trek...

And when you f--- up, you go backwards (snoball), Sunday, 2 February 2014 20:56 (ten years ago) link

right now i live at a friend's place because i'm waiting for furniture to arrive before i move. the other night i was out near my place so ithought i'd go back there to sleep. i arrived and then remembered that i still didn't have any furniture there. it was quite late so i ended up sleeping on cardboard boxes in my flat.

Jibe, Sunday, 2 February 2014 21:16 (ten years ago) link

I just poured milk into my water instead of my coffee.

Yesterday I put my e-cigarette thing in the drawer with all my pens.

I put the remote in the fridge a couple days ago.

I forgot my yoga clothes 3x.

Airwrecka Bliptrap Blapmantis (ENBB), Monday, 3 February 2014 13:37 (ten years ago) link


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