why do i hate that artist thing that people keep posting on my facebook so much? why am i such a jerk?

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kinda grossed out that neither of them bathe

Moodles, Saturday, 19 October 2013 15:27 (ten years ago) link

dude must have bathed between pooping and shaving, unless he just likes wearing the towel for ritual purposes

are we supposed to gather from this that women are less evolved than men

j., Saturday, 19 October 2013 15:31 (ten years ago) link

women dont have to be to work until 10, mans do work at 730

lag∞n, Saturday, 19 October 2013 15:34 (ten years ago) link

milkman?

Mark G, Saturday, 19 October 2013 15:35 (ten years ago) link

https://scontent-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/q71/1374122_10151985945300522_1029092397_n.jpg

All internet copy needs to be text printed out on a piece of paper, photographed and then posted.

pplains, Saturday, 19 October 2013 16:29 (ten years ago) link

i'm going to a surprise birthday party for a friend tonite

the way his wife chose to invite everyone (since she has more people's mobile numbers than email addresses) was to type out the invitation/instructions on a word processor, print it out, take a photo of the printout with her phone, then send that photo as a text message to everyone <3 <3

ᶓ͠סּᴥ͠סּᶔ ᶓͼ᷆ₓͼ᷇ᶔ (gr8080), Saturday, 19 October 2013 16:33 (ten years ago) link

Where do they no longer say the pledge of allegiance? Every public school in Texas does this. Is it a west coast thing? How hard is it to disprove this? This one drives me up a wall! I'll shut up now.

Liquid Plejades, Saturday, 19 October 2013 16:51 (ten years ago) link

"LET'S SEE HOW MANY AMERICANS DON'T CARE ABOUT OFFENDING SOMEONE!"

chimped the keeper (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 19 October 2013 16:57 (ten years ago) link

Pretty rad to live in such a free country and yet have to pledge your allegiance. Really makes you think about freedom! Why there must be countries out there where people aren't pressured to show their undying devotion to the Law of the State and it just makes me sad that those people don't know that freedom.

Emperor Cos Dashit (Adam Bruneau), Saturday, 19 October 2013 17:00 (ten years ago) link

China!

If you agree, like China. If you disagree, repost China!

Mark G, Saturday, 19 October 2013 17:11 (ten years ago) link

share China!

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 19 October 2013 17:12 (ten years ago) link

I think we have a winner in the image degradation stakes, and now I come to think of it the intelligence degradation stakes too...

I like to think I have learnt a thing or two about music (Neil S), Sunday, 20 October 2013 20:54 (ten years ago) link

Where do they no longer say the pledge of allegiance? Every public school in Texas does this. Is it a west coast thing?

They don't do it here in Wisconsin. When I was a kid (in the suburban Northeast) we said the pledge of allegiance every day and then sang a patriotic song (rotating between America the Beautiful, My Country Tis of Thee, and Battle Hymn of the Republic iirc.) So I don't actually think it's a made-up thing that there is less compulsory public expression of patriotism for schoolchildren then there was several decades ago.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Sunday, 20 October 2013 21:09 (ten years ago) link

i can see the author indignantly flicking his/her bangs as he/she wrote that last part

obi wankin' obi (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 21 October 2013 00:55 (ten years ago) link

fuck trees

^^ post obviously honoring and supporting Qualcomm (zachlyon), Monday, 21 October 2013 02:32 (ten years ago) link

If you could, you would be planting so many trees and you'd probably save the planet too.

Guayaquil (eephus!), Monday, 21 October 2013 02:38 (ten years ago) link

forgot it's the lack of trees melting the ice caps

^^ post obviously honoring and supporting Qualcomm (zachlyon), Monday, 21 October 2013 02:38 (ten years ago) link

I'm certainly not anti-tree but tbh I thought most of the breathable oxygen on the planet was produced by algae. Save the planet, grow some pond scum.

Viceroy, Monday, 21 October 2013 02:39 (ten years ago) link

fuck you i'll eat all the pond scum i want

^^ post obviously honoring and supporting Qualcomm (zachlyon), Monday, 21 October 2013 02:45 (ten years ago) link

fucking bleeding hearts

^^ post obviously honoring and supporting Qualcomm (zachlyon), Monday, 21 October 2013 02:45 (ten years ago) link

yeah phytoplankton in general i think

balls, Monday, 21 October 2013 03:04 (ten years ago) link

tiny little floating trees

three times a LAD (seandalai), Monday, 21 October 2013 12:42 (ten years ago) link

imagine if pond scum gave off wifi signals

Guayaquil (eephus!), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 03:23 (ten years ago) link

Pretty rad to live in such a free country and yet have to pledge your allegiance.

I got sent to the principal's office in hs for not standing up and saying it. Then they called my parents bc I wasn't 18 yet or some nonsense

dell (del), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 03:24 (ten years ago) link

I had to bring in a Note

dell (del), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 03:28 (ten years ago) link

*Cum's*
October 21, 2013 at 4:25 pm
*Cum’s*

ian, Tuesday, 22 October 2013 03:28 (ten years ago) link

http://boringasheck.com/2013/10/21/science-for-the-epic-motherfreaking-win/

― dell (del), Monday, October 21, 2013 11:06 PM (26 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ty

^^ post obviously honoring and supporting Qualcomm (zachlyon), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 03:32 (ten years ago) link

Tesla much? He’s epic as hell, which, by the way, is where Edison is. Or he would be, if hell was a real place, which it’s not. That reminds me, you see that image macro about how stupid those failshit Christians are? Bacon for the win.

lmfao

lag∞n, Tuesday, 22 October 2013 05:40 (ten years ago) link

She dared to eat with her mouth wide open

as a chocolate salesperson (ledge), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 10:17 (ten years ago) link

which is how she got the infection

if i could just chimp in for a moment (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 11:01 (ten years ago) link

aorta be a law against it

gotta lol geir (NickB), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 11:03 (ten years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/sai9fCx.jpg

pplains, Tuesday, 22 October 2013 13:24 (ten years ago) link

guilty lol

mh, Tuesday, 22 October 2013 13:58 (ten years ago) link

omg haaaaaa

Bitch Fantastic (DJP), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 14:03 (ten years ago) link

https://scontent-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/10006_575963929118849_3945665_n.jpg

Stiiiiiiiiiill falling for it.

steames artpop (how's life), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 15:35 (ten years ago) link

So, is there going to be a big party in two years, minus one day, then?

Mark G, Tuesday, 22 October 2013 16:00 (ten years ago) link

http://martymcflyarrivestoday.tumblr.com

lag∞n, Tuesday, 22 October 2013 16:05 (ten years ago) link

POLICE INFORMATION

The first bit is mainly for women, but gents , please read it and send it on to any women you care about. The second bit is a warning to all of us!

Some sound advice for us all, as we all sometimes forget to take our commonsense with us when we go out.
This is from Northants Police Women.....

Please read, and pass on.

An important message from the Police -
please pass this along to all the women you know.....

This actually happened a few weeks ago on the M3 FLEET SERVICES!!!

It was early evening, and a young girl stopped to get petrol. She filled her tank and walked into the store to pay for her petrol. The cashier told her, 'Don't pay for your petrol yet......walk around the store for a while, and act as if you're picking up some other things to buy. A man just got into the back of your car. I've called the police, and they're on their way'.

When the police arrived, they found the man in the back seat of the girl's car and asked him what he was doing. He replied, he was joining a gang, and the initiation to join is to kidnap a woman and bring her back to the gang to be raped by every member of the gang. If the woman was still alive by the time they finish with her then they let her go. According to the police that night, there is a new gang forming here, originating from London . The scary part of this is, because the guy didn't have a weapon on him, the police could only charge him with trespassing....

He's back on the street and free to try again. Something similar to this happened at the Tesco garage on Cardiff Road in Newport recently, but luckily the cashier saw the man get into her car. Please be aware of what's going on around you, and warn your family and friends.

LADIES, you or one of your family or friends could be the next victim. Please forward this on to everyone you know. Please do not discard this message; it is very important that everyone knows what is happening. Please be careful when leaving your vehicle, and make sure it is ALWAYS LOCKED to prevent this from happening to you.

MET POLICE

In light of the recent kidnapping and now murder of Leigh Mathews, I think it is important to read the following info for your own safety. Things women should know to stay safe: Please take the time to read these pointers. There may be just one or two you hadn't thought of. After reading this, forward it to someone you care about. It never hurts to be careful in this crazy world we live in.

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do!

2. if a robber asks for your handbag, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you..... He is probably more interested in your handbag than you, and he will go for the handbag. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. if you are ever thrown into the boot of a car: Kick out the back tail lights, and stick your arm through the hole and start waving. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc, and just sit (doing their cheque book, or making a list). DON'T DO THIS! A predator could be watching you and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, and attack you. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.

5. A few notes about getting into your car in car park:

a) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, look at the passenger side floor, and check the back seat.

b) If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most attacker’s surprise their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.

c) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the shop, or work, and get guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the lift instead of the stairs. Stairwells are horrible places to be alone, and the perfect crime spot.

7. if the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; and even then, it most likely WILL NOT BE A VITAL ORGAN

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic:
STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women, He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked "for help" into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.

9. Another safety point:
Someone just told me that her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird. The police told her, 'Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, 'We already have a unit on the way. Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' He told her that they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded and uses it to coax women out of their homes, thinking that someone dropped off a baby. He said they have not verified it, but have had several calls from women saying that they hear babies' cries outside their doors when they're home alone at night.

I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life.

A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. Send this to any woman you know who may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it, and it's better safe than sorry.

TO ALL CAR OWNERS AND CAR DRIVERS: PLEASE READ

Warning!!!! Be aware of new car-jacking scheme ..You walk across the car park, unlock your car and get inside. Then you lock all your doors, start the engine and shift or put into reverse. You look into the rear-view mirror to back out of your parking space, and you notice apiece of paper stuck to the middle of the rear window. So, you shift the gear stick back into park or neutral, unlock your doors and jump out of your car to remove that paper, or whatever it is that is obstructing your view.
When you reach the back of your car that is when the car-jackers appear out of nowhere, jump into your car and takeoff!! Your engine was running, you would have left your purse in the car, and they practically mow you down as they speed off in your car.
BE AWARE OF THIS NEW SCHEME THAT IS NOW BEING USED IN LONDON , MANCHESTER , AND MAKING ITS WAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY!!!

Just drive away, and remove the paper later! It is stuck to your window, and be thankful that you read this email. I hope you will forward this to friends and family, especially to women! A purse contains all identification, and you certainly do NOT want someone getting your home address. They already HAVE you keys!

JUST BE AWARE AND TAKE CARE -- IT WILL PROBABLY SOON ARRIVE IN YOUR AREA....

In times of osterity, these Eton-educated poshboys (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:01 (ten years ago) link

jfc, what interests me is who decides to regionalize these things? pretty sure this one started out as a US thing

such a classic irl (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:03 (ten years ago) link

Jesus Christ

steames artpop (how's life), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:03 (ten years ago) link

POLICE ALERT! The bogeyman is coming to your town, probably sooner than later. Pass this along to the people you care about.

Aimless, Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:04 (ten years ago) link

sorry, correction, "pretty sure" = "fucking certain"

such a classic irl (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:04 (ten years ago) link

"tail lights", "park or neutral", yep, that's an authentic Metropolitan Police gor blimey guvnor press release alright

such a classic irl (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:05 (ten years ago) link

just file this whole thing under "what the fuck is wrong with people?" i guess

such a classic irl (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:06 (ten years ago) link

The murder referred to as recent was from South Africa about ten years ago, iirc.

Ramnaresh Samhain (ShariVari), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:09 (ten years ago) link

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic:
STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed.

"Left-wing" poptimism: An infantile disorder (oppet), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 20:11 (ten years ago) link


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