why do i hate that artist thing that people keep posting on my facebook so much? why am i such a jerk?

The next logical variation on evil mailman is a letter back from Satan re: Abbey's eternal damnation.

well hello dere pretty lady sitting all bunched up on a chair

https://scontent-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/1509912_583364805077341_532916571_n.jpg

hahahaaaaaa

wait what

That whole page is a delight

https://scontent-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/1011666_566551393425349_1244484836_n.jpg

last one, I PROMISE

https://scontent-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1461034_566083940138761_1149776429_n.jpg

hahah

Too easy, but floating ghostly head of Eric Holder is a good touch.

the helmut kohl one is outstanding

I love it all!

Paul Walker one is pretty simple, but I love "and then hang up."

https://scontent-b-sjc.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/q71/1480544_576603069086848_1910929997_n.jpg

I know my marriage wasn't working, and I know I'm better off in #Iowa. But around #Christmas, I still miss #Kansas and my ex husband #Dennis. He was a cold man, but around the #Holidays, he would always Bring The Kindness. - #MissingSomeone #BringTheKindness #BTK

https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc1/1005805_515962891817533_754397774_n.jpg

https://scontent-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc1/1001112_511957978884691_448678545_n.jpg

relevant to my interests

https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/q71/1235314_525983850815437_1412499022_n.jpg

https://scontent-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/t1/1551696_268158160003655_167739552_n.jpg

oh, I see now in full size that that was from a tumblr. Anyway, it was shared via A Peaceful Warrior.

https://scontent-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/1483419_268158710003600_1821370586_n.jpg

https://scontent-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/1510602_268610449958426_809950155_n.jpg

Then you bro down.

Nice feeling that tbh, don't h8 for the sake of hating

hi i really miss you
hey i'm in love with you

-- lessons learned in life

2,508,325 likes

http://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2014/01/no-one-should-die-because-they-cannot-afford-healthcare-one-memes-story/282920/

But dramatically different incarnations caught on too. Just more than a week after the original phrasing went viral, a Star Wars-inspired take—"No one should be frozen in carbonite, or be slowly digested for a thousand years in the bowels of a sarlacc, just because they couldn’t pay Jabba the Hut what they owe him. If you agree, post this as your status for the rest of the day"—became even more popular. By early 2011, a politically-neutered, barely related variant—"No one should have to worry about dying tomorrow, but cancer patients do"—was consistently the most common.

http://cdn.theatlantic.com/newsroom/img/posts/2014/01/Screen_Shot_2014_01_08_at_1.21.55_PM/af5c7b30b.png

http://i.imgur.com/CAjDxZ9.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/N7Rt1cV.jpg

can i just

https://scontent-b-sjc.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/s526x395/1551679_10152197496198628_353141946_n.jpg

the guy who posted this is a nice guy and i hate to start beef but he's always posting this randian/horatio alger-ish stuff.

i want to see his workings

Take that, Science

My DAD has started TEXTING me these (well, the 'some ecards' ones) as picture messages
What the actual fuck

https://scontent-a-lga.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/q71/1517479_10151900972662406_1556721635_n.jpg

i have seen that one so many times!

Was introduced to it on this thread. Still gives me a chuckle though, I'm easy.

Everything you do is based on the choices you make.

"based on", eh? this guy obviously hasn't noticed, but it's turtles all the way down!

https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/1472846_773346756013227_1839481033_n.jpg

these things are unique to women? I don't get it.

they seem neither unique to women nor especially common to women

exactly.

women be pushin those pull doors!

My wife, always trying to get stuff done before the microwave finishes, amirite guys? What is with that?

so much microwaving, so much stuff to be done

people who open the microwave w/ remainder time and don't clear it. Brian? Stone? Somebody get on the case.

--Sojourner Truth

kind of a Tina Fey-esque feminine self-deprecation gone awry there

How to live like a king for very little
By THOR HARRIS

1. Don’t smoke cigarettes.
2. Drive old Japanese cars. Easy and cheap to fix & they run for fucking ever.
3. Buy most of your groceries from the produce section. Most of that other shit is not actually food. You don’t need it.
4. Ride your bike instead of driving as much as you can. You need the exercise and gas is expensive.
5. Don’t have kids. They’re not miracles, they’re people. 7 billion is too fucking many. Find some other way to give your dull existence some meaning. BTW they’re expensive.
6. Get your clothes from thrift stores. With the physique you’ll have from riding your bike, you’ll look hot wearing anything.
7. Learn to fix things. Tons of great books and youtube vids on fixing anything. Or ask an old dude. People used to fix things. No shit.
8. Learn a trade – Carpentry, plumbing, electrical, auto mechanics, tailoring, computer/electronics repair, something They can’t fucking outsource. No one gives a shit about your Masters in Dostoyevsky…. fix something, dumbass, fix something!
9. If you like booze, drink at home with your neighbors. Drunk driving is for assholes, rich ones with lawyers.
10. Do people favors. It’s called Cooperation. It’s how the world worked before money. They will return the favor, or someone will. No shit. This really works.
11. Make things – Look around you. What do you see? Yah, shitty stuff made by impoverished enslaved people far away. Pick anything. Make a better one. People want good shit. You won’t get rich, but you’ll get by.
12. If you live in America – don’t get sick and avoid injury. Wear your fucking helmet and put lights on your bike.
13. Find work you love. If you can’t do that, then find a job where you love the people.
14. Junkies and addicts are like toddlers. They just want to shit all over you and everything. The messes they make can get expensive. Avoid them if you can.
15. Don’t buy shit on credit, remember what happened to America? Cash only, fuckers. Can’t afford it? Don’t fucking buy it!
16. Preventable expenses - STD’s, abortions, DWI’s, lung cancer, head injuries, speeding tickets, cirrhosis of the liver.
17. Don’t go on fancy dates if you’re not fancy. Most people kind of despise the rich anyway.
18. When you go see shows, bring a flask in. That way you can afford to buy a record.
19. If you had told me 15 years ago that Coca Cola would put tap water in plastic bottles and motherfuckers would BUY IT …… No fuckin way.
20. Don’t get cable. Asshole. There is nothing on. I promise. $100 a month ? Fuck no!
This list was edited by Stacey Yates with contributions from Jherek Bishoff, Chad Raines & Amanda Palmer. We live in a wasteful society. Live well. It don’t take much. Really.

http://monofonuspress.com/how-to-live-like-a-king-for-very-little-by-thor-harris

kings don't live like that

some of those seem pretty otm, esp #18

King Toolbag the Joyless

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_children_of_Ramesses_II

Amanda Palmer