Her Hand in Marriage

Buttering up the future in-laws, eh? I'd go easy on that approach.

ime a good rel with the in-laws is a means to all kinds of security

Good relations with in-laws are U&K, but they can usually be established on a firmer basis if one doesn't resort to insincere flattery.

why you gotta be so rude, Aimless?

its good that Aimless knows so much about our specific situations.

why you gotta be so rude, Aimless?

I seem to have a defective internal filter. Do you know where I can go to have it fixed?

considering i needed her grandmothers diamond for the ring i kind of didnt have an option wrt this

i suppose i could have broken in

assuming thats not the firmer basis you were shooting for

"sorry about the bags over the heads and all but i didnt want to seem like i was brown-nosing"

maybe you should have broken into the house to ask them permission to come back and steal the ring at a later time

ask for permission. ask for the diamond. months later reveal the questions were not related but thanks!

triumphantly ride off into the sunset on your new Vespa

I asked because I knew it was an unnecessary formality that would go over like gangbusters with my in-laws and my wife thought it was adorable.
― Star Gentle Uterus (DJP), Monday, July 14, 2014 8:36 AM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Samesies

ride off into the sunset on your new Vespa

I've got a feeling that the relative poverty of both my family and wife's family has forged a different set of family traditions around marriage.

I proposed in Boston, where my wife is from, and we were staying at her mother's over the weekend. I woke up early the day I was going to propose and wound up having a really nice, long talk with her mom over coffee. It felt weird keeping the ring in my pocket a secret, so I told her, though I definitely didn't phrase it as a request for approval. She'd already sprung a "when are you guys getting married?" a few months earlier at our apartment over scrabble, and i knew her dad thought i was awesome too.

For the most part, she did a good job not giving anything away when my now-wife woke up, though mom-in-law-to-be was apparently unusually concerned that wife-to-be washed her hair before we went out for the day.

I'd ask for permission if it was DJP's scenario, where you're just adding the joy throguh formality. But if I even remotely saw rudeness on the horizon i'd probably pass.

ride off into the sunset on your new Vespa

I've got a feeling that the relative poverty of both my family and wife's family has forged a different set of family traditions around marriage.

― frog latin (Aimless), Monday, July 14, 2014 7:39 PM (6 minutes ago)

i wait what

He's just bitter he didn't get a wedding Vespa like the rest of us.

Iirc I was like, "Uh, did you ask my dad?" because I knew that it would be an issue.

― Airwrecka Bliptrap Blapmantis (ENBB), Monday, July 14, 2014 9:37 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

please tell me this was your immediate response (ie, before you'd affirmed or denied his request)

carl agatha otm. only got a blender.

...and Aimless rode off into the sunset on his new blender.

weird method of 'roid treatment but ymmv

http://victoryatl.com/img/pageheaders/2013/ph_married_life_b_595x250.png

RIP gabbneb.

the nebb and flow of marriage

xpost GODDAMMIT FUCK SHIT PISS

I don't think anything has ever met my preconceived expectations as completely as the GIS result for "wedding Vespa" did.

LOL, no. I didn't think about it until I called my parents to tell them. As I was dialing their number it occurred to me that this might be an issue and I was pretty sure that he hadn't (which was totally fine with me for the record). So I called them and, sure enough, after a couple mins my dad mentioned it and then I had to be like, um, he wants to talk to you and I think he wants you to retroactively ask if it's OK. :/ It was so fucking weird but I honestly think it was more of like one of those things that in his day that's how it was done and he thought it was just a nice thing and felt slightly hurt. I don't think he would have ever thought of it as giving away his property or actually thought to say anything other than sure.

my SO's father said he would say "no" to any one who asked, just to watch them squirm/mock the absurdity of it all. good fella.

I dreamt the night a few weeks back that I was on a group holiday with louise nurding and she asked me out and we fell in love and were gonna get married and we went to the airport and she said my dads brought my bags and I went to the car to get them and it was ms mac's aul fella glaring at me I woke up in bits

I would be extremely put off if someone I was going to marry asked my parents for my hand in marriage. Like, I would consider it an indication that it would not be a good match after all.

This times 10000. I am also 10000% sure that if asked, my father would act faux confused and say, "shouldn't you be asking *her*?"

also jesus h is creepy hand model creepy!

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

her parents are dead. thanks thread.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

it never even occurred to me to ask. and he didn't come to the wedding because we didn't invite his insane wife (we'd seen her act at a sibling's wedding)

did not ask. did not vote.