VegemiteGrrl's Home for the Absent-Minded

:D

Left the house, went to the store, walked to the bus and boarded before realizing I'd only buttoned the bottomed two buttons on my shirt (neck to mid-low abdomen exposed). Fortunately I was wearing an undershirt but still.....

i arrived at work with my fly open. you are defeated.

I think I bought a book earlier and then left it on the counter at the charity shop i bought it in. But I can't remember what the book is. I can just think about what was on the price tag and where i bought it.

& I did manage to walk out of a shop without what I bought last week after messing around trying to get the right change for the counter assistant. Thankfully he called me back as I left but god, felt really embarrassed and annoyed at myself.

used work door pass in the oystercard reader. looked very silly.

I spend hours at work, reviewing the procedures, waiting to be given something to do. Then when I actually get something I display the memory of a goldfish.

Left the house, went to the store, walked to the bus and boarded before realizing I'd only buttoned the bottomed two buttons on my shirt (neck to mid-low abdomen exposed). Fortunately I was wearing an undershirt but still.....

― Je55e, Tuesday, August 5, 2014 1:20 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

That's amazing.

I was listening to the last minute or so of a podcast while waiting for the subway. I take my kindle out of my bag since I want to read on the subway and put it on the bench next to me. Subway arrives, I get on. At this point, I am listening to the podcast that was next in the queue. About 2 stations later I realize I no longer have my kindle. I go back but the kindle is gone. Contacted lost and found multiple times in the last week but nothing turned up. This sucks. RIP kindle, I will replace you eventually.

Somehow, $25 worth of shrimp disappeared between my putting it in the cart and checking out.

put new package of smoked turkey in the fridge only to discover an unopened package already in there

absentmindedness is expensive & stupid :(

but yay double turkey

xp, Put in wrong cart?

A co-worker once bought like a 20-lb bag of frozen shrimp, put it in the trunk of his car, and forgot about it by the time he got home. Only remembered days later when he smelled it.

oh fuck

I think it got hung on the edge of the conveyor belt and never moved forward for me to scan it, and I didn't notice until I got home.

Earlier today I dumped a scoop of cat food into my shoe instead of the cats' bowl.

You maniac. I am stifling laughter so as not to wake up a sleeping baby.

lol

wow

je55e irl:

http://i57.tinypic.com/2j4qa9d.png

Wow. Worst I've done is poured cereal into a cup.

Once a ticket collector on a train asked for my ticket, I showed him my book for a few seconds and didn't understand why it wasn't accepted.

I tried to pay for a movie with my library card. Last Tuesday I wrote a check to someone, folded it up and put it in my wallet, and handed the person my checkbook instead.

looool

The number of times I've tried to swipe my (non)drivers license or company ID at the subway turnstile is amazing.

Just very nearly sprayed toothpaste under my arms instead of deodorant (cans next to each other on bathroom countertop).

the other night i got to my front door and was a bit puzzled when i tried to tap in with my oyster card and found a lock there instead

i think my sense of direction is gone to shit, i couldnt find my way driving back from my friends house last night. although its been a while its a trip i must have made about 20 or 30 times

bought some apples at a farm stand. like anywhere you hand them the fruit, they weigh it, tell you the price and you give them the money.

on Sunday I was just on autopilot or something. I handed the farmer my bag of apples and $5.
he takes the apples but not the money. I try to hand him the money again, like some kind of defective robot.

he gives me this look (and I come by every week so he knows that I know how this works) and he says 'I have to weigh them before I can take your money'

mr veg is standing next to me all 'lol wtf'

booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop *no signal*

The classic looking for my glasses for an hour and they were on my head. It sort of pissed me off in a very dispassionate way.

I was walking around with a letter, looking around for a mailbox. I finally stopped to search for one on the USPS app and realized I was leaning on one.

lol

Did you ever glance at the warnings about package size and then drop your parcel in there without considering its weight? I felt so bad when I did this, fortunately it wasn't that big and honestly wasn't a bomb, just some heavy books...

reached a new low a few weeks ago as I forgot I was pouring boiling water into the sink and unthinkingly reached to turn on the cold tap. you will all be glad to know I dealt w/ the scald v responsibly.

i went out with the sole intention of buying lunch, came home with shampoo and envelopes and washing up liquid but no lunch.

the poundshop balotelli

I got confused by my mobile phone boarding pass and showed the flight security attendant an Instagram of a bee.

left hotel room this morning, put key in jacket pocket so i wouldn't lock myself out. put jacket down, walked out of room without jacket. HOW DOES MY MEMORY FAIL TO REACH HALF A BLOODY SECOND

I got confused by my mobile phone boarding pass and showed the flight security attendant an Instagram of a bee.

This is making me giggle.

same

thirded

fourthed - what did the attendant say?

"ok I'll let you on just don't sting me with that"

lol @ jesse

"BeeOK"

the other day i had to get the cab driver to stop the car 50 yards from home because i could not remember whether i had closed my front door and seriously considered the possibility that i might have failed to do so

spoiler -- i had in fact closed the door

I once left the front door to my house completely open for a period of about 5-6 hours while I was away. As far as I know, nobody went into my house.

ive done that for a few hours while i was indoors

Last week I wore my t-shirt inside out to work and did not realize it until I went into the bathroom at lunch.

I also once wore two different shoes to work. They did sort of look alike.

Listening to Led Zeppelin at work. Caught myself just before I attempted to forward an email to Robert Plant. And, no, the name of the intended recipient wasn't even close.

I was checking out at the doctor's office. To my left are the big glass double doors that lead out to the hallway where the elevators are and a smaller wooden door that leads into a supply closet. I grab the key to the women's bathroom, and promptly walk into the supply closet. It takes me what feels like a really long time to figure out what the hell is happening, but it probably was only a couple of seconds. I came out, made a dumb joke, went out the correct doors and to the bathroom.

Then I came back, dropped the key off in the tray on the reception desk, and walked into the supply closet again.

I hope you pretended the second closet trip was an intentional joke. (Bow, "Thank you ladies and germs.")

I ran out the door without making eye contact and then went to a dark bar to hide while I waited for a prescription to be filled.

But I have to return in a week. Sigh.