Real England

Baby-faced-yob-10-given-ASBO-banning-meeting-friends-hanging-shops-terrorising-local-community-older-brother.html

not content with having a lower age of criminal responsibility than uzbekistan, bolivia or uganda, now the enlightened english public get to see the police photos of 10 year old boys published in a national newspaper

http://i.imgur.com/3SK1fkU.png

Young Advisor Clive

http://i.imgur.com/Ubbbpad.jpg

I’m Clive & I’m 21 years old. I’ve been involved with U R Boss for over a year. I’ve had the chance to talk to MPs and also been to a Youth Offending Team in Birmingham to speak to young people there. I enjoy my part in U R Boss and wouldn’t change it for the world.

Copyright © 2011 the Howard League for Penal Reform.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAhEFuq62-I

not so much the titular hero, tho he seems real enough, but his sudden overwhelming surge into the national consciousness

RIP White Van Dan. Nov 2014-Nov 2014.

that cunt is alluded to in this unusually reflective telegraph article

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/competitions/premier-league/11282658/Manchester-United-fan-Andy-Tate-and-Arsenals-Claude-the-Gooner-become-YouTube-hits.-But-why.html

idk if i would say jonathan liew is a particularly good journalist even by fitba standards but he seems to be doing something right judging by the borderline racist btl vitriol he gets

trad fitba journalism is very real and here rob shep shepherd, formerly serving at her majesty's pleasure, intermittently serving at lord rothermere's pleasures, takes umbrage at one of his own being sidelined in favour of this interloper

https://twitter.com/iLShep/status/534394374067847168

that's a decent piece altho the fact that it's been exclusively working class kids who i've heard running Wealdstone Raider catchphrases into the ground these last couple of weeks says that the memeification is more complex than only "lol proles"

I love these photos from the failed Yorkshire Magical Winterland event.
http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/03136/harrogate_3136434k.jpg
http://news.images.itv.com/image/file/547146/article_update_img.jpg
Despite promising a winter walk, a Frozen singalong and a chance to feed Santa’s reindeer, excited families were faced with a desolate scene of disappointment after paying £20 per ticket.

struggling to think what wouldn't be a desolate scene of disappointment if i was paying 20 quid a ticket

true!

i wonder if the seasonal loss of any sense of financial reality that comes over some parents is a Real England issue or a global phenom

I am probably slightly evil and misanthropic, but my sympathy rating is zero for those that got ripped in this case. On the other hand I am just as fucked as them, only so many times you can extend your overdraft with fuck all going in.

let's say one parent takes a couple of kids thats £60 before you've got in to something that's probly been knocked up in a fortnight, it's not quite three-card monte but it's still like begging to be gulled

I see that wakefield kirkgate station is finally getting done?

Paying 20 quid per ticket to enter a 'Yorkshire's Magical Winterland' only to see it fail miserably or get cancelled all together is pretty Real England to me. You paid up knowing, or should've known, it would fail miserably in the first place tbh. 20 quid magical winterlands don't happen in Yorkshire. It get's cold there, for sure, but it's a cold you can do without. If you throw 20 quid towards a spectacle this unlikely, yes, that is Real Englang to me tbh.

lol truth

listening to marmozets cos of the end of year thread and it made me wonder what bingley was like

Notable people

The Ickeringill family, which included the noted Chartists Isaac Ickeringill (b. 1803) and his brother George (b. 1810) [10][11] and Ira Ickringill (spelling accurate) (b. 1836), the Bradford mill founder,[12] inventor and Mayor of Keighley,[13] were born, raised and lived in Bingley.
Percy Vear Professional Boxer. Born Crossflatts, Bingley, July 12, 1911
Fred Hoyle Astronomer. Born Bingley, 24 June 1915
John Braine Author of Room at the Top. Worked in Bingley Library until 1942.
Chris Spence Journalist. Born Bingley 8 June 1970
Peter Sutcliffe Serial Killer. Born Bingley 2 June 1946
Rodney Bewes Actor, most famous role Bob Ferris in The Likely Lads. Born in Bingley 27 November 1938.
Muriel Aked Actress, born 9 November 1887 in Bingley, died 21 March 1955 in Settle.[14]
Pat Kirkwood Musical theatre actress, lived in Bingley in her later years.[15]
William Twiss, (1745–1827), Royal Engineer and designer of the Martello Tower, lived in Bingley on retirement and is buried in All Saints Church, Bingley.
Marmozets Band formed in Bingley in 2011.

RIP White Van Dan. Nov 2014-Nov 2014.

pretty lol when it dawned on Murdoch press that giving this guy exposure was just making people think Thornberry otm.

xp
quite a lot on Bingley's bingleyness at the start of gordon burn's book on the ripper.

Serious question: can anyone point to an example of one of these 'Winter Wonderland' type things that hasn't been a hilariously cynical rip off organised by career criminals?

dude, christmas is a hilariously cynical rip off organised by career criminals tbh

Winterland, 'ever get the feeling you've been cheated?' lol

xp: ur like the guy in the story who didn't like christmas and was mean but then something happened and he did like christmas and being kind after all

Jesus IIRC

http://i3.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article4795694.ece/alternates/s1227b/Yorkshires-Magical-Winterland-in-Harrogate.jpg

Shout out to leggings and foofy boots in background

xp: ur like the guy in the story who didn't like christmas and was mean but then something happened and he did like christmas and being kind after all

i thought of the funniest response to that, then i googled it and 33,000 other clowns had got there first

Serious question: can anyone point to an example of one of these 'Winter Wonderland' type things that hasn't been a hilariously cynical rip off organised by career criminals?

Hyde Park Winter Wonderland? Like obvs it's a rip-off etc, but it's v v pro, probably does what it says,

london is not real england

i had no idea there were so many of these things.
liking the Chester one, sponsored by MBNA card services and ft. Matalan's Grotto.

Real Englanders definitely visit Hyde Park's Winter Wonderland, though: I'm trying to make sure my visiting cousin realises that, mainly so I don't have to go there.

Much of the Hyde Park infrastructure seems to have been imported wholesale from Germany, which goes some way towards explaining the professionalism. People seem to enjoy it - but there are no upfront ticket costs so you need to gull people into buying overpriced chestnuts via a good customer experience rather than gulling them into buying tickets for up front for a dog dressed as a reindeer.

Much of the Hyde Park infrastructure seems to have been imported wholesale from Germany

Would say Xmas has been getting very Ersatz indeed what wif all these Xmas markets everywhere

http://www.lrb.co.uk/v36/n24/james-meek/worse-than-a-defeat

http://i.imgur.com/B0bLaUf.png

thought some of the unfamiliar might enjoy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5o1SCETBRc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6dW-Cr3S1U

Huddersfield 1990

Lol That is Deighton where I was born and raised. Later in the doc there is a mixed race dude called Leon who is a self confessed house burglar, he talks about a botched burglary where the tenant wakes up and he makes a daft comment like "the dirty bastard was sleeping in his socks". Not long after this doc was made he was kidnapped by a serious Mancunian drug dealer (for some ridiculous failed drugs robbery fiasco) who kept him prisoner for weeks and tortured him, beat the crap every day.
There is a real nasty fucker on here who plays the benevolent community leader, he is one of the most repulsive thugs I have known, apart from the serial killer I went to school with from neighbouring Bradley!

I'm not talking about your clip obv. I mean the full length doc

At a point in the late 90's I ended up managing the bookies at the top of Deighton Rd. Most dangerous job I ever had, I got coshed on the head and a robber shot at the ceiling above me in the same month once. Death threats were the norm on a daily basis but that was just bantz! The guy who shot at me, shot himself the next day when surrounded by WYP armed response guns and there was an eerie whispering campaign by his family that I was at fault for his death for talking to the police. Not been back there since tbh and the bookies got closed by WYP because of drug related shit.

I know this far fetched but it is the truth!

sounds

fuuuck

the first thing i think of in that documentary, same as anything from 90-93 or so that i see these days whether factual or fictional or wherever it is set, is how old it seems

that is a tautology because it should seem old, it's just that realization that it has gone from something like like a living past that is still contiguous with the present to a latent archival past, a separate epoch that is as irrecoverable as the 70s or the 50s

i'd have been sat there in a motorcycle helmet all day if that was me xp

and when i say 'there', i actually mean 'at home, preferably somewhere under my bed'

Jesus Xelab!

And my word... That Huddersfield Estate doc is absolutely amazing. I need to find a full copy w/ better sound of that. Simply amazing. Chills.

that burglar kid is quite handsome, at least when placed next to his friend with the chris waddle italia 90 look