ILX Parenting 6: "Put Some Goddamn Pants On Before You Go Outside!" is a thing I say now

Tale of two kids, or more likely, to ways of approaching injections. I was late getting both Aidan and Molly their pre-school boosters (MMR and Tetanus) With Aidan I decided to prep him, so he'd know what to expect. we watched youtube videos and talked about it. getting him to the surgery was a bloody nightmare and he was cowering under the chair in the nurses room, howling, and I had to manhandle him so she could do them. He was so upset that he wouldn't even eat his chocolate afterwards. Fast forward four years, phone up to make an appointment yesterday for Molly's and was offered that afternoon. Decided to go for it, just told her she was going to the nurse for some medicine to stop her getting sick. She was all excited, no problem going in, sat there as the nurse prepped the needles etc. was a little bit nervous looking, but sat on my lap and didn't move at all, sat still and quiet as the first went in, and helpfully shuffled round to get the other one in the other arm. No tears, no howling, no nothing, just a 'my arms hurt a bit mummy' as we scooted away.

I'm still a bit dumbstruck, and feel bad for how I handled it for Aidan, poor boy.

At my four-year-old's last well-visit, she was due for a round of four shots. The nurse and I quietly colluded to just spring them on her. Got her to lay down on the table, pulled down her shorts and I gently held her down while she was injected in her thighs. This was much more preferable to the way it had gone down when my older kid was her age, which was a typical squirming screaming kid on your lap scenario. She definitely felt betrayed about it though.

We've been going a little more disciplinarian lately because she's 3.5 and is so defiant at times that it's impossible to do anything, and all of the soft approach "reason with them" "get down to their level" stuff just doesn't work with her -- I think she actually sees through it. Last night after, among other things, throwing her food, insisting her dinner was yucky (although she ate the same thing last night), and deliberately banging, stomping, kicking and hitting just because she knows it annoys us, and screaming next to the baby, we did a kind of extreme time-out therapy where she had to stay on the bed until she could be quiet and stop tantruming for 15 seconds and then promise that when she came back to the table she'd eat her dinner and not throw a tantrum. And if she started to act up again after leaving the room (and "promising" to cooperate) we'd go back and do it over again. It probably took twenty minutes of repeatedly taking her back to her room and doing time-outs on the bed, but eventually she agreed to behave, came back to the table and ate her chicken. Of course I feel sort of bad every time I do something like this, but I hope it was effective.

feeling that post

f'real. Having a long conversation with a toddler = attention = what they want more than anything.

I saw my friend's 8-week-old today and had genuinely forgotten how tiny and squirmy little creatures they are!

It's so weird because I think partly because of her personality and intelligence and partly because of our largely liberal parenting style (although we do use the occasional time-out/punishment), authority is just so like ALIEN to her sometimes that she looks at us in complete disbelief when we try to give her consequences. And she totally imitates us too, like she'll tell us that our PUNISHMENT is "not nice" and that what WE are doing is "against the rules," because in her mind it's almost like we're equals. And I have to sort of admire this radically democratic, anti-tyrannical tendency in her mind, even as I hope to mercilessly squash it until she's older.

Oh I get that all the time. "You are NOT BEING NICE" when I make the asshole move of washing her hair or making her get dressed.

Actually most common these days is "THIS IS THE WORST"

lol

My coworker's youngest always tells her that she's hurting his feelings when he tries to make him brush his teeth or not punch his brother or whatever.

This is making me feel so much saner, I thought I had somehow managed to raise a committed 3-year-old anarchist

My coworker's youngest always tells her that she's hurting his feelings when he tries to make him brush his teeth or not punch his brother or whatever.

haha yeah we get this all the time too. "Eat your salad!" "You're hurting my feelings!"

lol

We get a lot of "No! Don't do that!" "You don't talk like that!" etc

yeah I get this too, even with my not-so-youngest : I discipline, she cries and tries to make me apologize

Only after she had pulled my pancake from my plate, taken a bite, and then dropped it on the floor, did she decide to put her pancake in her mouth.

But I am a GROWN MAN and I can OUTWIT a DAMN BABY so I will make you another pancake and put it on MY plate and then you will take it and eat it.

Judging by the EAT SHIT, DAD, I GOT YOUR PANCAKE look on her face, she thinks she is the victor here. LITTLE DOES SHE KNOW.

Eight months old.

Now she's waving it in front of me like a taunt. I'm gonna get summoned to the headmasters office often.

Much truth is found here - http://www.thehonesttoddler.com/2015/06/how-toddlers-see-their-food-vs-your-food.htm

Much truth is found here - http://www.thehonesttoddler.com/2015/06/how-toddlers-see-their-food-vs-your-food.htm

So much truth I had to post it twice.

Page not found.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4hxDrFEdCkM/VZCNVYbKQVI/AAAAAAAAB_Q/nbqaCtYMeNA/s1600/how%2Btoddlers%2Bsee%2Byour%2Bfood.png

:D

ty ty

4. Let her pick out her own shirt which requires me holding up all of her shirts for either a "Nonononono" or a "Yeah

Oh we put a stop to this real quick because it got to the point where she was clearly saying 'no' just to say 'no'.

She dressed herself from that day forward.

Ivy has started trying to get out of her crib, but rather than climb out, she just pushes herself up onto the rail and attempts to launch herself headfirst out of the crib and onto the floor.

We're lowering the mattress tonight.

ph jeez

oh even

Does anyone/did anyone use pacifiers with their babies? We were given the advice that it's "better than having them suck their thumb" but we're having the exact same experience with #2 we had with #1: first couple nights they don't really want it, then they start to want it in order to fall asleep, then it starts falling out of their mouths and waking them up, and pretty soon they become unable to fall asleep because every time the pacifier falls out of their mouths they wake up. GAH!

Ivy used a pacifier for awhile, with the same issue that you're having. So when she switched to her thumb, we celebrated! And now she's a total thumbsucker. That only bothers me when 1) strangers comment on it and 2) she puts her hands all over the filthy bus and then sticks them in her mouth.

we attempted pacifiers for both boys when other soothing techniques weren't working but they never really caught on so we ditched them

also fuck everybody "FOUR MONTH SLEEP REGRESSION"

"FOUR MONTH SLEEP REGRESSION"

fuck this bullshit

F was up from like 12am to 4am last night

and my toddler is all of a sudden getting night terrors? so weird

fuck everything about babies/toddlers not being able to just learn how to sleep and stay knowing how to sleep

we used pacifiers (Judah still wants his to go to sleep) - they grow out of it. I don't recall Veronica causing much of a stink when we told her they were all gone and she was about the age Judah is now (2 1/2)

fuck everything about babies/toddlers not being able to just learn how to sleep and stay knowing how to sleep

otm.

otm yes

even as someone w a history of sleep problems I'm like come on you lil bastards it isn't THAT complicated

my oldest used a pacifier until she was like 5 & we had to hide them, cut the tips off, but she'd grab one from a secret stash she'd put together, jonesing for the good suck, she's clean now but it was tough

haha we are nearing the cutting the tips off stage - at this point we're insisting he only have it when he's sleeping (of course mostly it's just to go to sleep, once he's asleep it falls out of his mouth)

xp: I'm glad to hear that. My littlest is almost 5 and still addicted to her pacifier. I've been very good about keeping her off during the daytime, but mrs. life is more lenient. She had problems with sleep apnea when she was littler and some doctor told my wife "oh yeah, just keep her on the pacifier..."

I was anti-dummy for some vague reason but used one from 1 month. It's great at settling him but now like you say he needs it to go back to sleep when he stirs. Or does he? Maybe I'll try turning the monitor down tonight and see if he can re settle.
It was nbd when he was next to me but now he's in his own room.

I'm determined to wean him off it after 1 year or so but in absence of dummy he tries to stuff his top/sleeping bag into his mouth rather than just suck his thumb.

He only has it in his cot so hoping that'll help.

doctor had to reassure my wife today that Super Sweaty Toddler Syndrome is *not* a thing... our son is just sweaty