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sudden attacks of memory so vivid i lose track of where i am--in the past, all my memories were in the third person. now, for the first time, i'm remembering from my own point of view.
man I have been there. if you can grok it, get that this is possibly a sign you are ready for new terrain, for a huger sense of yourself.
is this board indexed? if not, can we move this?
I'm not on the "God only gives you what you can handle train" most days but sometimes with memory I feel like your heart knows what you can take, and knows that you'll be happier and healthier if you go through the hard stuff and emerge higher, so when it won't crack you, some stuff comes through. that was true for me when my abuser died. I could stop pretending it hadn't been so bad. it changed my life, but it was hairy going for a year or so -- lots of sudden crying fits, very intense times.