Shady scams and other silly business ideas to take advantage of earnest new vinyl collectors

Almost makes me pine for the days when I walked into a flea market and was outraged that they were selling beat-to-hell common Beatles albums for $15.

it just seems like this weird combination of collectorism and cluelessness? Like there's nothing special about these records, it's just "here is a famous album on vinyl." I don't know what the prices are like. I assume they overcharge, but the prices for new vinyl on sites like Amazon are already ridiculous.

― on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Friday, September 18, 2015 10:18 AM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

It's so funny how there are these business models that entirely rely on the consumer being:

1. Into the idea of owning vinyl.
2. Not yet knowledgable about music aka notable artists/albums
3. Not confident or unwilling to do research.
4. Excited about subscriptions and/or "mobile app" reliant frameworks

It's weird that vinyl has gotten fashionable enough to make #1 and #2-4 co-exist for an individual, but it is clear that these services are for young people that have only ever known what it's like to listen to various collections songs on pandora or spotify, unlikely ever in context of an "album" so not only is the physical idea of vinyl alien and novel and puzzling and exciting, but perhaps so is the idea of an album at all.

Just the idea that there are enough people that fit that mold for The Edit to have an office and employees. Though that market for vinyl is such a fad I wonder how long it'll be profitable for them.

I really want to make a parody site of The Edit and Vnyl but with easy to find VHS tapes, straight-faced with all the same rhetoric included.

There's something a little Silicon Valley twenty something about it, like thinking your narrow little demographic represents a much bigger market than it actually does and trying to base a startup around it

I guess it's not new exactly and applies to so many previous sites and mail order services but these vinyl ones in particular are trying to create a niche for themselves as expert curator middlemen even though they're totally unnecessary and their choices are obvious. It's like joining a beer of the month club where they dig deep and send you obscurities like Sam Adams Octoberfest and Boddington's.

The larger trend of "curated" consumer products also strikes me as pointless and even a little narcissistic.

see also:

A Box of __________ Shipped to Your House Each Month

xp haha exactly

I really want to make a parody site of The Edit and Vnyl but with easy to find VHS tapes, straight-faced with all the same rhetoric included.

This is pretty brilliant. Tapes are only $1 apiece so the profit margin could be huge.

"We know you'll enjoy the romantic comedy Jerry Maguire"

"No one should be without a copy of River Phoenix's breakout performance in Explorers!"

"And finally to satisfy that mob movie craving goodfellas gave you, check out john turturro in 'men of respect'"

You could dole out box sets one video at a time to stretch it out over months or years. For instance the 6-tape box set of cult hit Twin Peaks will arrive at your house bimonthly, one tape at a time, with a special bonus casing box delivered with the final tape at no additional charge!

"Tapes are only $1 apiece so the profit margin could be huge."

Selling tapes for $1 a piece is a huge profit margin already. I think you're getting screwed by your tape retailer.

I'm fine with losing out bc of the outstanding curatorial work done by the fine folks at Goodwill.

You could dole out box sets one video at a time to stretch it out over months or years. For instance the 6-tape box set of cult hit Twin Peaks will arrive at your house bimonthly, one tape at a time, with a special bonus casing box delivered with the final tape at no additional charge!

― AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, September 18, 2015 3:11 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Only $22 a month, and get this they come lovingly encased in a protective Ziploc® bag #cuzwecare

office has naturebox and it's kinda good

Not sure whether to drop this here or in the snakeoil thread: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/linephono/turntable-station-audio-furniture-solution/description

lost it at the lavish paean to the material richness of.. MDF

Just take a wiping cloth (or a clean cotton rag) and rub the surfaces of the Turntable Station. Each level should take you 10 minutes.

hey, developing a really choice patina on mdf requires some tlc.

not surprised to see clear frame glasses on one of this monster's creators

$75,527
pledged of $10,000 goal

their store is like, ok, but charging $400 for some particle board is ridic, and then to have the gall to go on about all the material's fine high-end qualities like it's this obscure boutique product they painstakingly sourced after a long creative struggle is just hilarious. not buying my next cartridge from these clowns.

who donates to kickstarters like this? oh, I hope dearly to see these guys achieve their dream of hoodwinking everybody and... selling a product? why does that even need donations? just like, build some, and sell them.

"Stop overpaying for custom furniture" it says. $349...

I hope Ikea copies that shit and sells it for $60

don't even know where to put this:

http://mynoise.net/NoiseMachines/dustyScratchedVinylNoiseGenerator.php

You can use our dust and scratch generator to add a new "old" dimension to your digital music. When properly set up, these noises will interfere with your songs less than you might expect. Instead, they will increase the perceived sound quality of your poor recordings by adding frequencies and transients that are missing.

This generator is great, especially when put together with the Beatles album of your choice. Personally, I'm listening to it with Abby Road, though, any music created before cassette tapes were invented will sound better with this as background noise to make it sound more like an authentic record.

Play this and My Girl by The Temptations for the perfect sound of vinyl jazz.

I just found this and it's perfect to play with my Star Wars A New Hope soundtrack. Takes me back to listening to my parents records on lazy afternoons.

Great to add to classical music too! I remember listening to Mozart on vinyls when I was a child, and this noise overlapped to modern recordings reminds me those times so much.

mozart wrote the best crackles it's true

the perfect sound of vinyl jazz

Paired it with a cello/piano cover of a Fall Out Boy song... this is surreal.

seriously though, when you mess with the presets on there you can make an amazing glitchy ambient record.

i'm pretty sure you could send a cd of those noises to Mego and they would give you a record deal.

(commenter, not me)

lol @ scott, that is probably true

so soothing...

I hope you can simulate inner groove distortion or a dirty stylus

i want to simulate the record jumping a couple seconds from me walking out to the kitchen to get a beer, otherwise forget it

recreate the sound of a record skipping bc of a speck of gunk, incorporate the pause while it's cleaned off, then resume.

man there has been vinyl pop generator plug ins since the 90s

Needs a slider for the sound of massive bong rips in the background to put the finishing touches on re-creating the 70s.

Scott have you thought about having a superwarm section in your store for vinyls with extra crackle? Could be a big seller man

instead of hot stampers we could have warm cracklers

ew

Yes! I have a sloan lp here that looks likes it's been cleaned with a garden rake, just the thing for nostalgic Canadian pre-millennials. the surface noise is deluxe!

seriously though, when you mess with the presets on there you can make an amazing glitchy ambient record.

― scott seward, Friday, 9 October 2015 15:33 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

cf Philip Jeck's live performances

I have oval records made from cd glitches that have added vinyl crackle, truly the best of both worlds

Oval albums on vinyl seems some sort of shady scam

I check out the sale vinyl section at Urban Outfitters every so often, and I noticed that they now have ~10-20 used records for sale mixed in with the new stuff. The used records have fresh plastic covers with big orange stickers that say "Vintage" in some font probably called "Vintage." They also cost $10 and are shit.

https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xfp1/t51.2885-15/e15/10955497_511867858951982_686863165_n.jpg