Star Wars 7 shit talk

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unlike everything in Star Wars, which totally does not defy the laws of physics ever

if you accept that the force is a thing I can allow for some flexibility in the behavior of matter. Whereas transformers are 50 foot tall robots on earth who pretend they're cars.

joygoat, Saturday, 3 October 2015 01:09 (eight years ago) link

If you can accept the force then the allspark can't be much of a jump

μpright mammal (mh), Saturday, 3 October 2015 01:10 (eight years ago) link

allspark, did someone say?
http://news.tfw2005.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/10/2010/02/Yoda_1266125789.jpg

Philip Nunez, Saturday, 3 October 2015 02:10 (eight years ago) link

this is totally it. cuz it sure ain't the dialogue, the direction, the acting, the subtext (there isn't really any), the characters, or anything else that typically makes a film great.

― Οὖτις, Friday, 2 October 2015 21:20 (Yesterday) Permalink

Not that this could possibly convince you, but I'll go ahead and say it's silly to say there are no worthy characters or performances in these movies. I mean, come on, for all their flaws, there are a number of memorable characters, charismatically performed--Han Solo, Vader, Yoda immediately jump to mind. This is an obvious component of the films' lasting success!

I mean, I've also watched the movies through my adult eyes and realized how creaky some of the dialogue is, how wooden certain performances are, and how they're generally more inert than I remember. But there are reasons beyond awesome set and sound design why it became iconic and, like, Logan's Run and The Black Hole did not.

intheblanks, Saturday, 3 October 2015 02:10 (eight years ago) link

Not that these movies need my prosaic defense in any way! And I'm totally tired of them too, but when you look at other space opera sci-fi, it seems pretty clear what Star Wars has going for it.

intheblanks, Saturday, 3 October 2015 02:13 (eight years ago) link

agree! Although I loved The Black Hole as a kid.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Saturday, 3 October 2015 02:17 (eight years ago) link

not to put something out there that I don't feel like expanding on (much) but...

one of the things that I liked about the OG star wars trilogy had is the sense of infiniteness -- there were all these AWESOME ALIENS in the cantina but none of them had names (at the time), or all the dudes wandering around Bespin or w/e and that gave the illusion that the galaxy went on and on and on and you could never hope to see it all. The idea that there was so much out there in the world that could be seen but not understood or compartmentalized is pretty powerful to a 6 year old who sees the world through that same lens. I never got into the EU stuff for pretty much that reason. Once you start trying to give a name to everything some of the wonder goes away.

How Butch, I mean (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Saturday, 3 October 2015 04:33 (eight years ago) link

otm

tbf the black hole is not bereft of good design work - the model stuff of the big ship rules, and maximilian stuck with me. but almost everything else is goofy or clunky or both. costumes look like costumes; sets look like sets. and obviously the characters might as well be wax dummies, even borgnine. so even before you consider effects, story, or cinematography, it's clear that star wars has got something that this has not.

Gorefest Frump (Doctor Casino), Saturday, 3 October 2015 05:17 (eight years ago) link

Actually guys I just realized that a guy who claims to "care less" about stuff yet spends a day or two trying to ensure that we all understand that Michael Bay's most hated films - about some shit that was a toy set before it was ever even a shitty series of movies- are the cultural equivalent of a landmark trilogy that millions of people loved right away even though they'd never heard of it before (from a nobody director) - that guy might be trolling. What do you think.

You know what never mind, let's entertain this argument some more. I think the TF movies and Avengers and Star Wars are all the same, because they are all in full color, and loud. None of them discuss how the Swiss invented the cuckoo clock, or what that means.

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Saturday, 3 October 2015 05:21 (eight years ago) link

XP The Black Hole fucking rules. I hum that score on the way to work on the regular.

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Saturday, 3 October 2015 05:22 (eight years ago) link

oh yeah the theme is awesome. the titles too. I found it very hard to watch as an adult, is all. never a problem with star wars obv.

Gorefest Frump (Doctor Casino), Saturday, 3 October 2015 05:25 (eight years ago) link

both Black Hole and Tron are much easier to digest as an adult if you treat them as the biblically-inspired operas that they are.

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Saturday, 3 October 2015 05:54 (eight years ago) link

star wars benefits a lot from lucas being at that time a pretty classic '70s style filmmaker with a good eye for imagery. I think the original is really exceptionally made and edited and acted. The dialogue is the weak link but most of the cast is good enough to make you forget it. most of the time. ford especially. guinness was on point too. I think the weak part is in some ways how quickly it moves from the escape from death star to the assault on death star. it feels like there's a good 20-30 min of training or prep or intrigue missing in there. luke's a pretty good pilot for a kid who's only shot womprats imo.

Anyway Lucas is easy to clown for the prequels and rightfully so, though even there he exhibited great imagination and there's stunning individual visual moments even in those flicks. Hard to find with the writing, acting, plotting, pacing, etc, but they're in there. Clearly the guy's no George Miller wrt dusting himself off and returning to form and then some. But back in the '70s he was good.

nomar, Saturday, 3 October 2015 06:09 (eight years ago) link

it's the mysticism of SW that i loved - do your training blindfolded! fold that hi-tech visualizer away and look at it FOR REAL! so exhilarating

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Saturday, 3 October 2015 10:16 (eight years ago) link

There's a great history, probably linked up thread, that makes a strong case that a lot of early excellent Lucas is actually his first wife Marcia Lucas.

Andrew Farrell, Saturday, 3 October 2015 11:50 (eight years ago) link

yeah she's been completely written out of the official narrative

Number None, Saturday, 3 October 2015 14:24 (eight years ago) link

So I just bought tickets to a slightly-early screening of this to benefit the Greater Cleveland Film Commission. It will screen at 7pm on 12/17, about 5 hours before the wide US release.

I might like you better if we Yelped together (Phil D.), Friday, 9 October 2015 17:39 (eight years ago) link

not to put something out there that I don't feel like expanding on (much) but...

one of the things that I liked about the OG star wars trilogy had is the sense of infiniteness -- there were all these AWESOME ALIENS in the cantina but none of them had names (at the time), or all the dudes wandering around Bespin or w/e and that gave the illusion that the galaxy went on and on and on and you could never hope to see it all. The idea that there was so much out there in the world that could be seen but not understood or compartmentalized is pretty powerful to a 6 year old who sees the world through that same lens. I never got into the EU stuff for pretty much that reason. Once you start trying to give a name to everything some of the wonder goes away.

― How Butch, I mean (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Friday, October 2, 2015 11:33 PM (6 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Yeah totally. The fact that it left so much unexplained made the universe so much more real, and it was probably my first exposure to a story told in that way.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Friday, 9 October 2015 18:48 (eight years ago) link

The Black Hole is sort of hurt by a lot of the Disney touches, e.g. those cartoonish floating robots with their corny dialogue, but there are aspects of it that are genuinely terrifying, and yeah, the theme rules.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Friday, 9 October 2015 18:49 (eight years ago) link

gosh watching clips on youtube it really does look a lot worse than I remembered

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Friday, 9 October 2015 18:53 (eight years ago) link

I re-watched The Black Hole not too long ago and yeah, does not age well. Schell is hammy *even for a Disney movie*, and most of the actors seem bored. (Borgnine puts in some effort.) Maximillian robot still genuinely, and I love that he just leaves Schell for dead like "Would love to help, but I have a thing."

I might like you better if we Yelped together (Phil D.), Friday, 9 October 2015 19:04 (eight years ago) link

I can't help but think that the makers of Event Horizon were fans, though.

I might like you better if we Yelped together (Phil D.), Friday, 9 October 2015 19:05 (eight years ago) link

I watched it within the last decade and yeah it doesn't hold up - plot and characters are largely nonexistent

Οὖτις, Friday, 9 October 2015 19:36 (eight years ago) link

Jeez, next you're going to tell me that The Last Starfighter hasn't aged well. Whither my childhood memories.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Friday, 9 October 2015 19:48 (eight years ago) link

Counterpoint is that The Last Starfigter was always awesome

How Butch, I mean (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Friday, 9 October 2015 19:51 (eight years ago) link

I am eyebrow-tilted by the fact that sometime between when I gave a shit about this stuff and the SW: Battlefront beta, the pronunciation of AT-AT changed from an acronym (at, at) to an initialism (ay tee ay tee).

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Saturday, 10 October 2015 23:39 (eight years ago) link

gr8080

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Sunday, 11 October 2015 00:10 (eight years ago) link

Exactly. Who wants to go up against an 8080? of any grade.

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Sunday, 11 October 2015 00:41 (eight years ago) link

I know I am gradually turning into a gawker media stan already but these two listicle / clip mixes have really made me want a PS4

http://kotaku.com/eight-players-who-killed-it-in-the-star-wars-battlefron-1735641858

http://kotaku.com/10-priceless-fails-from-the-star-wars-battlefront-beta-1735757709

wait what board am I on

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Sunday, 11 October 2015 00:59 (eight years ago) link

I bought a PS4 yesterday, see u on the BATTLEFRONT.

I might like you better if we Yelped together (Phil D.), Sunday, 11 October 2015 17:22 (eight years ago) link

Man, I am not precious about Star Wars at all, but it has done nothing to deserve FPS players.

Andrew Farrell, Sunday, 11 October 2015 17:34 (eight years ago) link

How so?

Purves Grundy (kingfish), Sunday, 11 October 2015 17:58 (eight years ago) link

The gif at the top of http://kotaku.com/one-gif-sums-up-star-wars-battlefronts-modern-multiplay-1734746714 is a decent place to start? Basically multiplayer in general is (I know, I know) a hive of scum and villainy, console and PC both.

Andrew Farrell, Sunday, 11 October 2015 20:11 (eight years ago) link

just downloaded this :/

playlists of pensive swift (difficult listening hour), Sunday, 11 October 2015 20:16 (eight years ago) link

see you in 2016

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Sunday, 11 October 2015 21:27 (eight years ago) link

Oh, you mean pubbie scum

Purves Grundy (kingfish), Sunday, 11 October 2015 22:17 (eight years ago) link

I spent about 2.5 hours playing the Drop Zone map in the beta, to discover that I am really, really out of practice on FPS. I've been playing platformers and MMOs so much, I was just getting decimated.

I might like you better if we Yelped together (Phil D.), Sunday, 11 October 2015 23:42 (eight years ago) link

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CRnIPhQUYAAoupy.jpg

Number None, Sunday, 18 October 2015 16:28 (eight years ago) link

Nice.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Sunday, 18 October 2015 16:31 (eight years ago) link

no Luke in the poster?

too young for seapunk (Moodles), Sunday, 18 October 2015 16:41 (eight years ago) link

he hasn't been seen (apart from a hand maybe) in any of the marketing material so far

Number None, Sunday, 18 October 2015 16:47 (eight years ago) link

ANOTHER Death Star?! O_o

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Sunday, 18 October 2015 16:48 (eight years ago) link

Still... Chewie taking aim looks rad :)

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Sunday, 18 October 2015 16:49 (eight years ago) link

I especially like how you have to think for a minute about where Chewbacca's right arm ends and Leia's hairdo begins. Like what they're going for with
Rey's staff and Kylo Ren's saber, but hair

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Sunday, 18 October 2015 18:20 (eight years ago) link

trailer for the trailer

https://twitter.com/DisneyStudiosCA/status/655806407648800768

Number None, Sunday, 18 October 2015 18:23 (eight years ago) link

Interesting to me that, in the material we've seen so far in trailers, we've seen a desert planet, some kind of snowy/icy environment, and some kind of jungle/forest environment. All the primary planets from the OT. Gotta imagine that's purposeful.

Resting Bushface (Phil D.), Sunday, 18 October 2015 18:29 (eight years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxU2eqZtYmc

Number None, Sunday, 18 October 2015 18:32 (eight years ago) link

I'd suspect everything about shooting a kwazillion dollar franchise meso-reboot is pretty purposeful

I'm pissed that the new-trailer teaser trailer doubles as an ad to make people watch fucking Monday Night Football.

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Sunday, 18 October 2015 18:35 (eight years ago) link

oh yeah and the stanza rhyming bit. I read about that earlier on some other site for nerds

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Sunday, 18 October 2015 18:36 (eight years ago) link

will the new movies ever feature people eating food or visiting a WC?

BRAAAAAAMETHEUS (El Tomboto), Sunday, 18 October 2015 18:38 (eight years ago) link


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