start a victory garden and ration your IRRATIONALLY ANGRY feelings, part 3

• The On Demand channel

i never really watch tv anymore*, but i've been watching a lot of the baseball playoffs online the last couple weeks, which has exposed me to ads for the first time in a while. i guess i was inured to them previously because now they are somehow enraging in their stupidity

i don't want to buy a lincoln because matthew mcconaughey looks pensive and intones vague koans about L-I-V-I-N. driving a fiat is not a satisfactory way to rebel against restrictive stereotypes. and holy fuck do i not want my phone or computer to speak aloud to me

naomi klein otm i guess

I bet having a focus group dude throw eggs at you makes you wanna buy a Chevy, though.

I am particularly IA about the girl in the Chevy commercial who says "This is not what I expected from a Chevy!" in the voice of a rejected Kristen Wiig character.

HSB otm

I bet having a focus group dude throw eggs at you makes you wanna buy a Chevy, though.

yeah what the fuck is that? at least there haven't been any talking babies for etrade

when people flash their lights at you for reasons other than "you're driving slow, please leave the left lane", "your lights are out" or to warn of impending hazards ahead.

like tonight I made a U-turn at a light and this dude coming the other way who wanted to get into the Bank of America lot almost cuts me off to get there, til he sees I'm coming. then he flashes me...

what do you want dude? me to come to a dangerous abrupt stop just to let you go through? are you hitting on me? is your car a sentient being?

i need clues dogg

Apparently he disagreed with your maneuver, but didn't think it was worth honking about.

well he's reconsiderin' six feet under the soil right now

(massive sandstorm)

the reason it didn't make sense tho was that I'd already made my U-turn and had already traveled .2 of a mile down the road when he pulled into the left turn inlet coming the other way and then almost just kept going, like he didn't see me, then flashed me.

people who do gofundme's for shit like replacing a tire or paying rent for a particular month.

like I contribute to GoFundMes for things like extraordinary hospital bills, sending an ill friend to obtain experimental procedure that might help condition, shit like that...replacing a fucking tire? those are normal life costs, man. and rent? hint: it's due every month!

also people who use apostrophes improperly on ILX threads despite knowing better

Yeah a person I know did a GoFundMe or similar so she could go on a holiday to england. Unsuprisingly, she got a bit of blowback on that one.

(and moaned and whined about how cruel people were so of course then her faithful flocked around her instead).

I would totally do one if I thought I could get student loans paid off. I'd take all the blowback in the world to get that taken care of.

Sometimes when I think "those are normal life costs, man. and rent?" etc, I then think of those old ladies that feed huge dollar amounts into those fruit machines for no other reason than they are widowed, husband was some mega-exec and they literally have money to burn, and think "they might as well give it to someone that's had a tough month and is having problems paying rent or fixing a tyre or owt"

I then think of those old ladies that feed huge dollar amounts into those fruit machines for no other reason than they are widowed

Are you talking about slot machines?

yes. Same thing?

It's early in the morning here. I was trying to connect the fruit machines with a device that would give money to someone who's had a tough month.

abt to take credentialing exam, proctor waiting until the last second to start. why did i arrive an hr early i think im going to literally implode

'fruit machines' is so cute. i might gamble if they were called that.

I was trying to remember whether you could buy fruit from vending machines in countries where they spell it "tyre."

Thank you for the assistance, pp.

would you have understood if he'd said 'one armed bandit'?

(not that any of them have been lever operated since the 70s)

(unless you are in Ocean Beach, South Shields)

(but those only take tuppences)

most of those old biddies are straight up gambling addicts, handing what's left of their social security checks into those one-armed bandits because what else is there in life at this point

Can't wait for my dad to go back to Tunica so I can ask him how he did on the fruit machines.

"They're called slot machines."

"Yeah, with the cherries and everything. So did you win on the fruit machines?"

to reiterate, mark was very clear about what he was talking about. I was the one who somehow came up with this nonprofit redbox contraption with a "Giving Tree"-like logo in my mind.

Lol.

To be clear I contribute to GoFundMes for friends most of the tine.

It's just one or two people I know who seek just enough work to make their monthly bills, spend the rest at the club, and act shocked that sometimes unexpected expenses pop up.

My roommate did one for REGISTERING HIS CAR. he drove it without registering it for four months figuring nobody would notice til the condo towed it.

Next he'll do one for two ply tp

That extremely fluey feeling you get for days after getting a flu shot.

Is there a statute I'm unaware of dictating that the credit card readers at the checkout of a given business must be meaninglessly proprietary and function in a slightly different fashion than credit card readers in every other place of business? Can we maybe just agree on an SOP and eliminate the guesswork? It's like if every business had an unspoken standard for a particular way that paper currency had to be folded or passed before they would accept it as payment.

And, yes, I get that this is like the most maximally-petty IA ever. I can own that.

the closest grocery store to me had this series of hurdles i had to leap just to make a payment. first the cashier would ask me "credit or debit?" and i'd say credit, they'd hit a button and say go ahead, and i was then prompted to select...credit or debit. i had to then swipe my card, approve the amount, sign, etc.

the new amazon recommendation page is a bit odd. mine has, amongst the usual books and videos, the following categories:

Mobile Phones and Communications - seems to be mostly USB chargers
Portable Sound & Video - USB chargers and more
Vehicle Accessories - mainly usb chargers
Computers, Components & Accessories - chargers for usb

enough already

> That extremely fluey feeling you get for days after getting a flu shot.

not had this in any of the last 3 years. the first year it did feel like i'd been shot in the arm for about 2 days but i've never had flu symptoms.

That no fucking 7/11 near me ever fucking has the lo call Gatorade in big size...or more flavors than gwape

Drives me crazy that I have to push "cancel" to go into credit mode instead of debit.

There's also a fuel pump in the neighborhood that lights up a red light with the word "GO" on it when it's accepted your info.

lol... Kroger?

Targets here do that stupid cancel thing. Publix doesnt.

Having this extremely weirdly slow nosebleed: every 6 hours or so one nostril fills with semi-dried blood, gets emptied, starts again. My nose is as lazy as I am.

hell yes, wmc.

I mean, what the shit.

http://i.imgur.com/OLnptFM.jpg

(^^ not my pic.)

I'll never say anything again about white people taking pictures of their bagels: https://instagram.com/explore/tags/krogerfuelpoints/

Wow, I thought I was doing great when I got regular for 1.65 on Saturday. That person had to have redeemed hella fuel points on that tankful.
xp

Got it for $1.48, but hell, it was already $1.88 regular price.

Shoulda taken a picture, I know.

What's it like to live in 1986?

surprisingly good dialup speeds

Fuckin Tandy is on the fritz

Didn't know you knew Jessica.

Oh yeah. Back here in '86, she's just as spry as ever.