L@@K! Photos from Real Estate Listings (see remarks)

Also, I love this shit so much. Gotta go find some corkers.

when we were househunting we looked at a place that was just like that converted garage, it was like there had been a terrible murder & they had just done a fly by night carpet/paint job.

oh and: no acoustics. completely dead sound. creeeeeeeepy as fuck.

There were a lot more fish in that barrel than I imagined last night when I started clicking around the local realtors map.

http://i.imgur.com/lGxucgj.jpg

FOR SALE: The slightly worn set used by the short-lived cooking show "Food Times".

http://i.imgur.com/5K1rFTf.jpg

"Oh, don't mind me here, Irvin. You just go ahead and watch your football game."

http://i.imgur.com/PGjSjlX.jpg

"I did it! I meditated and travelled back to 1974 to meet my true love!"

sees remote control on coffee table

"Nooooooooooo!!!"

http://photos1.zillowstatic.com/p_f/IS1fcmx9hqs3b81000000000.jpg

After a long day at the office, I like to kick off my flip flops, snuggle up under a sleeping bag in my favorite lawn chair, and listen to a CD."

Whoops. Don't forget to turn on the spotlights.

It's hard to reach the light switch when the earth is tilting like that.

lol the harp photo

I don't know if this goes here or on the your terrible ideas thread.

But browsing through the Memphis listings, decided there really should be an Eggleston Realty Co.

http://i.imgur.com/8em8sM5.jpg

"It's a fixer-upper, but you do get free Web access."

http://i.imgur.com/EDyjtXF.jpg

"This property's great, I just have to talk to my husband about – wait, is that someone playing a Peter Gabriel song?"

http://i.imgur.com/ki2KezG.jpg

"Just picture relaxing in your office, listening to the dryer tumble and smelling its fabric softener scented fumes. Can't picture it? Well, here..."

http://i.imgur.com/voX5sp4.jpg

Who puts slogans on their wall like that? It looks like a nursing home.

― I checked Snoops , and it is for real (Trayce), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 04:48 (Yesterday) Permalink

House painters and interior design mags convince people to do all kinds of stupid shit, often because it costs more and/or will seem tired in a few years. Painters convinced us to do a stupid-looking two-tone thing in our eat-in kitchen that I really regret. Walls really don't need to be two colors.

http://i3.au.reastatic.net/800x600/536fb89fbb581e49c8faa4924f7db6be6b0d7c2fad95f0eb90057b039be871ac/image3.jpg

Horror House II: the Stalking Sink.

The place in that pic costs $200 a week people. Melbourne is an expensive hell.

What is that room? And down here, what's going on with the mirrored top in front of the mirror with the ... air hockey puck on it?

http://i.imgur.com/72Mf62F.jpg

Anyway. Melbourne might be expensive, but blue paint sure ain't.

Ha, right? I think thats just a living room, with a laundry off it because that makes sense? Actually, tbf the ad was for a bungalow behind a house, so its probably only 2 rooms all told.

Now thats how you sell a bedroom ... ? :|

http://i1.au.reastatic.net/800x600/cac680e2c76c8585c7998bd1abf0a11e11d88499575c3e531f6ed1163234aee2/image5.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/IV8btMU.png

They'll give you 15, but you'll only need five!

Ugh I fucking hate how narrow OFI windows are. And at such useless times, too, who has time to get off work and make to an opening at 5 if they work til 5.

I miss the days when you could just walk into an agents, pick up the keys for a bunch of properties and leave a fiddy for each one in deposit.

I've tried to understand what's going on with Australian real estate, but it's hopeless.

For example, in the States, you hold an auction only if it's a foreclosure or it's a shitty property that no one wants. Apparently down there, it's the opposite - you take the photos and show your home, then wait for the big auction day where you'll likely get more than you asked for.

(Well, in Sydney, at least.)

Yeah sale by auction is something that crept in maybe 15-20 years back and seems ubiquitous now. And its precisely so they can make as much money as possible (a la ebay auctions I guess). I've been priced completely out of home ownership because I need $80k just for the *downpayment* and I just cannot get that sort of money together. Its insane.

yes they listed with swastika graffiti intact http://www.movoto.com/quilcene-wa/411-sea-home-rd-quilcene-wa-98376-501_320196/
http://501.mlsimages.movoto.com/096/320196_14.jpg

Geez.

I was thinking thats a lot of money for a shitshack but its on 7 acres of waterfront, that'd go for like 3 jillion here :(

"Yah, you can look at it that way, but didja know that in some cultures, it's a symbol of luck?"

its a banksy

I feel IA at the shape of the living room in this luxury condo in my neighborhood that also sells for nearly 3x the price of a nearly equivalent co-op apartment.

https://ssl.cdn-redfin.com/photo/79/mbpadded/207/genMid.2841207_2_0.jpg
https://ssl.cdn-redfin.com/photo/79/mbpadded/207/genMid.2841207_3_0.jpg

You don't like that it ends at a point?

Look! You get that nifty little reading nook because of it. If it was flat, the nook would directly face the rest of the room.

IDK why it annoys me so much, partly just because it's so narrow compared to typical apartments in my neighborhood, which are mostly very spacious due to having been built in the 40s/50s. The point is awkward to me though, like it doesn't really look comfy as a nook, but it also doesn't interact with the rest of the room.

but it also doesn't interact with the rest of the room.

http://i.imgur.com/MobN7iy.jpg

Could that be the point?

http://i.imgur.com/btS0Gny.jpg

It does look narrow, but hey, isn't that life in the big city?

http://i.imgur.com/IZM4caY.jpg

"Can I get you anything? Perhaps some Pringles?"

xp, IDK it just looks like an awkward layout resulting from an awkwardly shaped building resulting from an effort to put the maximum # of apartments on an awkwardly shaped lot to me. And it's absurdly expensive for the area, although the terrace has a "bar pergola."

http://i.imgur.com/NmT5hLR.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/bqI3ItM.jpg

"You may think that sign is corny, but you should've read what the original one said."

http://i.imgur.com/o65F4TB.jpg

- "Hey, Judy! Can you get me another beer?"

- "Sorry! I can't hear you! I'm in the kitchen!"

http://i.imgur.com/NJlddBA.jpg

- "I can't see very well in here. Does that say 'Haunted'?"

- "No, of course not. That would be silly. It says 'Wanted'."

http://i.imgur.com/fdjQJbr.jpg

"Well let me ask you something else: Are you a fan of Duke basketball? How about Israel?"

http://i.imgur.com/DtShLKV.jpg

Hmm. Maybe there's good reason why it's the loneliest number.

http://photos2.zillowstatic.com/p_f/ISphukilm6juxw1000000000.jpg

"Pressure-washer gathering dust? Have we got the house for you!"

That one hits a little too close to home.

As in, that is my home - how did you find it.

i am truley sorry for your lots

L at at K!

http://photos1.zillowstatic.com/p_f/ISp5hyampu965f0000000000.jpg

Comes with your choice of costume: cowboys and saloon girls, gangsters and flappers, or old-timey bathing suits!

Interesting backyard:

http://i.imgur.com/5L3hQLL.jpg

Do ya like Creedence? Well, take a look out of this back door!

never gets old

http://i.imgur.com/2ybcYtF.jpg

did f.w. murnau design that bathroom or

https://www.redfin.com/NY/Unknown/108-17-64th-Rd-11375/home/20914037?utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=listings_update&utm_source=myredfin

$1.25 fucking million!

https://ssl.cdn-redfin.com/photo/79/mbpaddedwide/187/genMid.2860187_0.jpg
https://ssl.cdn-redfin.com/photo/79/mbpaddedwide/187/genMid.2860187_1_0.jpg
https://ssl.cdn-redfin.com/photo/79/mbpaddedwide/187/genMid.2860187_2_0.jpg

I dunno? Maybe the light fixture in the second photo's cut from real diamond?

Was just browsing and found this. Weirds me out that it comforts me knowing this room is alive and well somewhere in America.

http://i.imgur.com/Yddfu7A.jpg

1. need to cover this area with metal panels so i can hang my metal panel
2. sinkhole bathtub with cabinets just begging to cut you open
3. kitchen sink faucets
4. a metric mile of cabinets
5. lines like pick up sticks

'metric mile' lol, i meant a standard kilometer

I might have to see that one in person

Seriously, is that hole for washing sand off your feet?

I thought the right mirror was some sort of curved magnifying — well, it makes no sense what I thought it was. But it does do a nice job illustrating how the paint on the wall accurately matches the sky.

"Metric Mile" is genius, btw.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/10309-Twin-Leaf-Dr-Bristow-VA-20136/237918286_zpid/?

A lot of work for that.

It was a fun journey though! I jumped a little when it went from that one slide to the next one.

Still have a hard time believe in people pay 3/4 of a million to live that far from DC, even if it does have a basement full of blood

I can only go 2/3 of a million, but it's a lot further from DC than that one.

https://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/11671-Mill-Dam-Ct_Bentonville_AR_72713_M89471-87473

You'd better hope He is!

https://i.imgur.com/9JOUmMa.png

https://i.imgur.com/8XPousj.png

Basement of Blood is my favorite band

mid-tier Fighting Fantasy book

Another listing from Eggleston Realty.

https://i.imgur.com/Hhl0ZYY.png

The curtain is there for when ur doin things that you don't want the painted ducks to see

corded phone with requisite impossible-to-untangle cord is a nice touch

Nothing to see here. No laffs, no jump-scares or anything.

But it is just photo after photo of "what is happening here".

Contains the following:

• Doublewide barndomenium
• Sam's Club membership
• Breaker box in living room
• Power outlets on the ceiling
• Possible password revealed in QR code
• Stolen cart from Dollar General

https://i.imgur.com/KaFtBL0.png

and a chicken in the closet

yes, and a chicken in the closet.

The house is fine, but boy did I react to these chairs.

https://i.imgur.com/5heE9Qu.png

https://i.imgur.com/Isr74KS.png

https://i.imgur.com/dcTYrNQ.png

DOORS. What do they do?

• Provide privacy

• Blocks sounds from rest of domicile

• Provides barrier to smells, moisture

• Helps regulate airflow

In this half-million-dollar listing, there's a bedroom with those barn doors, a closet enclosed by one of Steven Tyler's scarves and, by my count, THREE BATHROOMS that feature only CURTAINS.

thanks it's hideous

Bedroom with barndoors I can kind of understand, the rest of it is...wow.

I just don't understand the appeal of interior barndoors in general.

you want airflow but don’t want a pet to get into the room— imagine it like a pet or kid fence

They look rattly though. Maybe I need to see some in person.

For me at least, a bathroom needs an effective barrier to noise and smells.

https://i.imgur.com/QQTKFzB.png

"Man, I hate it when they put the TV over the fireplace."

-

https://i.imgur.com/K5ZOfdu.png

"Say no more!"

That's a security monitor. Which only makes it worse, of course.

I didn't catch that, but it sure is.

Hope no one steals their pool.

i didn't notice at first, it was just little buckets of water each time, but then I went for a dive and found out the hard way there was no pool left

Atlas and his Four Horsemen struke again

is this house in lino lakes?

Reliquary of Tone

I just need to make a new thread devoted to television sets in the wrong places.

https://i.imgur.com/enMZIU0.png

Bad enough that the set in the center is not just behind the door, but also appearing to stick out further than the stopper, but also that there's another television set located six feet away.

Anyway. Feel free to say hi to Lou and Kenny while you're here.

Rare example of getting married AND keeping your beer sign.

https://i.imgur.com/OWc1qI8.png

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/140779604#/?channel=RES_BUY

OK wow

reminds me of the “womb chairs” they had at my undergraduate institution

I love those kind of slideshows.

Ok? Ok? Ok? Ok? Ok? Ok? Um. What? Wait. Ok? What? WHAT?

https://i.imgur.com/ga0eVWK.png

I too fight this battle, but you can't surrender to your pets like this.

Bet that dude's always singing "I Talk to the Wind" in the shower, amirite.