BAH HUMBUG! List things that suck about Christmas in 2016

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MEJMnLZKuVU

okay, Invasion USA isn't exactly about Christmas, but the pivotal scene of them blowing up suburban houses with real rocket launchers (which opens in the trailer) deserves some attention.

Batman Returns is super-Christmas-y too. Die Hard is still an amazing movie and no amount of irony or whatever will change that.

o shit I forgot about Batman Returns!

http://giphy.com/posts/7-gifs-that-prove-batman-returns-is-a-christmas-movie

is Hook set at Christmas?

Depressing Pantsless Alien Santa upthread. Why?

I want to see more examples of depressing winter wonderlands.

Don't we have a thread for this, too, or did I dream it?

xp I think that's supposed to be the Grinch

xp Ah, there is!

Has anyone been to the Lapland Theme Park?

http://www.nwemail.co.uk/news/barrow/Santa-sacked-and-market-traders-fail-to-show-as-Barrow-Winter-Wonderland-is-branded-unacceptable-and-shocking-9977482b-e0c8-453c-8772-95d46855fcdc-ds

Santas caught smoking seem to be a perennial hazard at these things.

hey, it's a stressful time of year for him

Freezing yer balls off as Christmas music plays "It's the most wonderful time of the year" - FUCK OFF

muppets christmas carol and the grinch are the best christmas movies

Rugrats Chanukah is the best Christmas movie

I don't think I've ever heard all of "Fairytale of New York" tbh but I also try not to hear the Pogues. (Thankfully, this has not been hard since the 1980s.) "I Believe in Father Christmas" = forever tho.

And Elf is fun enough.

elf is kinda rubbish. lots of better examples of the idea.

Every snowfall is just another reminder that too soon, snow and ice will be forgotten altogether as we head towards a climate apocalypse.

doommongering of 2016 wont be missed

The Thin Man or GTFO.

Just to balance things out - a colleague told me they experimented by putting a knob of Boursin under the lid of a mince pie and apparently this is a revelation and now I can't stop thinking about this idea FML

ok mince pie w/boursin does sound awesome and i am going to try it v soon!!* (does FML mean "for my lunch"?)

*(very likely with some m***** w***)

The post office is a Mad Max hellscape at Christmas. But the thing that sucks is the person buying 7 books of stamps to mail 150 cards. Get a fucking postage meter you senseless asshat.

I dont even *know* 150 people. Guarantee only 20% of them even want a card

who sends Christmas cards to all their friends these days anyway? I remember my mum going spare one year in the mid 90s because she didn't know what to do with all the cardboard being shoved through her letterbox every day. The French never really did the whole Christmas card thing half as much as the Brits, who if seems felt duty bound to hand you a Christmas card in person if they'd so much as bumped into you with their shopping trolley in the supermarket.
thank god for social media.

*it seems

Antifa Sell – ‏@andy_sell

You become a reasonable & worthwhile adult when your favorite Christmas movie switches from Die Hard to Tangerine.
10:54 am - 13 Dec 2016
16 RETWEETS41 LIKES.

this is how you sell a movie, by making it sound doing your taxes

https://itself.wordpress.com/2016/12/16/the-true-spirit-of-christmas/

We see the parents literally forging their child’s letter to Santa, including the details of his handwriting. When the son walks in, he turns on a dime and demands to be cut in. Ultimately, the happy family gets both their Lexus and a puppy. Other children are confused, and others are pressed into service and try to perform well to please their parents — including during high-pressure moments on Santa’s lap — and this lends an air of innocence and idealism to the very cynical premise. In this example, though, even that small veneer is ripped away, as the child is every bit as nihilistically opportunistic as his parents.

It's an excuse to put their product and a puppy onscreen at the same time.

Christmas is dumb as fuck

Christmas is great fun as long as you don’t have to do things with your family

"This headless drummer boy was just one of the disappointments at Brooklyn Museum's Winter Fair"
https://thenypost.files.wordpress.com/2018/12/winterfair.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=642

"Families slam Bolton Winter Weekend over plastic ice rink, deflated snow globe and 2-hour queues for Santa's Grotto"
https://i2-prod.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/incoming/article15464185.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/1_SR_MENN_251118BOLTONWINTERWEEKEND03.jpg

"Parents were left underwhelmed by the Santa South West Christmas Village"
https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/NINTCHDBPICT000453802634-e1543927069354.jpg?w=960

"Visitors to Reindeer Lodge in Leeswood, near Mold, Flintshire, claimed they had to walk through boggy fields, queue for ages to see Santa in his 'grotty' grotto alongside 'sleeping' reindeer with 'grumpy' elves."
https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2018/12/03/15/6948246-6454937-image-a-21_1543851000790.jpg

i'll probably post this picture at least 5 more times before the 25th

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DuG_6iYWwAAyjRn.jpg:large

i'm that dog every year

that santa looks eerily like Vivienne Westwood

Supermarkets stuffing their shelves with row upon row of Christmas party food which nobody seems to buy and which will have gone off by Christmas anyway.

Target’s Christmas section always looks like a war zone, i am convinced they actually stock it to look that way

Whamageddon

still upset about this mulled wine slander