"We've got bucketfuls of agents throwing players at us. We'll trawl through it." - The PL/CL/EL/world off-season transfer thread '17-'18

I'm not sure who Rooney to Everton for free triggering Barkley to Spurs for north of £40m would work out worse for, tbh.

Lots of questions about Wayne Rooney back to Everton. Is he a better option than Arouna Kone & Enner Valencia? Definitely.

— Phil McNulty (@philmcnulty) July 4, 2017

Lmao.

Just when I needed a pick me up

what the fuck is wrong with these people?

liability
lʌɪəˈbɪlɪti/Submit
noun
1.
the state of being legally responsible for something.
"once you contact the card protection scheme your liability for any loss ends"
synonyms: accountability, responsibility, legal responsibility, answerability; More
2.
a person or thing whose presence or behaviour is likely to put one at a disadvantage.
"she said the party had become a liability to green politics"
synonyms: hindrance, encumbrance, burden, handicap, nuisance, inconvenience; More

Tick

Tick

Thick as fuck

We've finally got the striker Mounie for 11.5 mill, probably about the most wowsome signing in our history. There were lots of rumours someone else had hijacked the deal, but it turns out the announcement was delayed because he was attending the Montpelier chairman's (Louis Nicollin) funeral. I seem remember a piece in WSC about the late chairman when Montpelier won ligue 1 about 10 years back. And he was a wealthy scrap merchant with rep for being a loudmouthed bigot, or maybe a "colourful character" for French people who like old bigots.

"I don't care about the other, these big teams, Huddersfield is a big team".

I like the cut of his jib already.

HTFC already looking like they'll bring value imo

I don't there is any danger of sanctions for not spending enough, because there are more to come!

*think

From what I've seen of Mounie, he will bring the aerial presence we have have completely lacked last season and much more.

say what you like about rooney, he definitely is white and english.

I've never had a doubt in my head at any stage in his United career that the only team Rooney would leave them for was Everton.

Well his contract kinda locked that down

Novel approach for Everton to chase someone else's bad money with their good tho

i guess sunderland had already been relegated

Yeah, to his fucking level

this thread's just getting good now but don't think we've gone deep enough into the terry/bruce homoeroticism.

Terry explained: “Honestly, the way Steve dealt with me as a person. Giving me a lot of time and constant texting reminders, saying: 'I want you, I'll give you time. But just to let you know I'm here, thinking about you. I'd love to see you at our place next season.'

“And those things as a player made me wake up and go: 'Cor, he wants me.'

I read that yesterday, showered, moved on with my life and I'll thank you to respect the progress I've made and presume we're all trying to make

"i want you. i'll give you time. but just to let you know, i'm here, thinking about you..."

bruce is a good fit for a lurking, creepy, 80s soul figure in the lionel richie "hello" mould.

Ah there was serious talk of Man City at one stage, and there was the lingering possibility that Moyes/Woodward would not hand him a ridiculous bumper contract as he started to obviously wane. But he was always destined for this third act back at Goodison... get sent off at Anfield or something.

we've been away to crewe inside my mind... and in my dreams we've trained some kids, a thousand times

xpost sorry still musing on bruce

I'm intrigued as to how this deal is supposed to work with wages, etc. I can't imagine a scenario where Utd actually make money. Not that I care at this point. Whatever it takes

I think he's taking a paycut in return for a free transfer

Never mind making money, not paying him the guts of 100 million or whatever for the benefit of his brooding presence around Carrington is a great deal

Just imagining Bruce sticking some Marvin Gaye on just as Terry's Lambo pulls into the Villa Park car park.

Would pay to see JT's loving sculpture of Brucie's head, rendering of squashy nose particularly anticipated.

hahaha

Wayne Rooney is in advanced talks with Everton about rejoining his boyhood team with the potential move centring on the Merseyside club matching the £250,000-a-week basic salary he earns at Manchester United.

he might need to bring a glossy brochure to the negotiations, with his stats and McNulty testimonials etc. That might get him up to national minimum wage. Where the rest of this 250k is coming from is a mystery. Image rights? He looks more Alternative Drainage Solutions than Nike these days.

https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/cc0d7799b38a3ed2fe5a47fee6801d5a1a0d6e28/0_51_2560_1536/master/2560.jpg

good image in the guardian

Well fuck me.

Best swap deal ever.

penny for Morata's thoughts...

He's pushing for 5p and a buyback clause

Very strange deal

Not least because, not trolling here, Everton a better team than utd as of this window

show your workings...

Difference at end of last season, +/- transfers, momentum of coaching efforts.

If proposed Rooney/lukaku moves happen then all that is cancelled and Everton will go down like the titanic

Ironically as a result of the impact of a similar tonnage of impeccable whiteness

all will be fine when they sign josh king for 20 million

Trying to work out if our signings from last year stepping up (as in fairness has been somewhat of a pattern recently) would mean that our squad would be ready for this season.

Speaking of Josh king, like

Difference at end of last season, +/- transfers, momentum of coaching efforts.

If proposed Rooney/lukaku moves happen then all that is cancelled and Everton will go down like the titanic

― quet inn tarnation (darraghmac), donderdag 6 juli 2017 10:34 (forty minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Otm. Everton are building a really fine squad it seems, but if Teh Roo is indeed returning, it will be sad trombone.

obv they may well not have been able to hold onto Lukaku, but swapping him out for Rooney is straight sabotage

75m is low taking into account that this is for all intents and purposes a proposed swap, and therefore the difference in wages over what, three years? is likely to run to something like 3x52xc.100k

That's not even taking into account that lukaka will be worth something in three years and be worth something ito onpitch in the interim whereas Rooney has been worthless for ten years and in three years will only be of interest to Japanese fishermen

I'd imagine they'd see Giroud as closer to a direct replacement and Rooney as more of a stand-in for Barkley, but idk. They can probably still shift him to China or the MLS for a few mil at the end of the season however badly he performs.

Rooshi roll xp

Rooney being transported on tarpaulin spread between two flatbeds constantly doused with lard this summer will certainly be the last move of his career and Everton must know that, SV

Giroud makes total sense for them, Rooney at this stage is not just the answer to a question nobody is asking but he's a tetsuo in waiting

Everton have been busy in the market, dunno if they're pulling up any trees exactly. Pickford and Keane are solid signings (but Utd have better) Klaasen is quality (but Utd have better) and then the two young forwards could go either way (Utd have a few of those too)

Regardless, there was no scenario in which Lukaku stayed at Everton this season anyway

The latter is true the "betters" are up for discussion as is the question of what exactly the riddler mourinho will attempt to confound us with next tbh

If Koeman brought a contagious disease into the dressing room, it wouldn't do as much harm as Ronney's presence will. And would also be a man sight cheaper.

Freudian typos ahoy!

Selling your best player/attacking threat for crazy money and spending the money on seven or eight new signings at once. That always works.