Star Wars 8 shit talk

This piece articulates many of the things I loved in the movie: https://www.avclub.com/part-kurosawa-part-wile-e-coyote-the-last-jedi-boldl-1821291545🕸

xpost -- Gross.

Enjoyed it! Imperfect, whoever said it dragged in the middle at points was right (I had to duck out at one point for a restroom break and pretty sure I chose well because I didn't feel like I missed anything much). During the movie I felt the whole 'sit-there-and-get-pot-shots-thrown-at-it' approach of the one cruiser was odd but given The Secret Plan and showing up impatience I suppose it works...sorta? Because why wouldn't a bunch of transports go to a convenient planet with an old base that's apparently right there.

But yeah, that was a fun watch, more than a few upendings of the SW visual templates, and the only two things I was convinced would happen -- Snoke surviving for a final showdown in the next film, and, perhaps oddly, Chewbacca dying (I really had a hunch that they were going to do that) -- obviously didn't, so I'm good with upset expectations. More than anything I'm intrigued where the hell the final movie in this sequence goes -- I figure Abrams will take it in for a solid landing and all but that's a higher bar to clear than before.

A whole lot of conservative types on Twitter seemed to really hate the movie. Sucks to be them?

that whole anti-1% sequence chapped their asses i'm sure

imagining College Republicans standing up and yelling at the screen

the other thing about the plan to go to the abandoned Rebel base is they had to come up with it on the fly, because they had originally jumped to light speed to escape and regroup for a while. Having Star Destroyers show up unexpectedly and kill 95% of their officers undoubtedly put a damper on things.

I'm not sure if the Mineral Planet was in the plans prior to all of that happening or if it just happened to be a lucky opportunity.

why not more sorrow for Akbar?

"We're in the middle of nowhere and the First Order is wearing us down. Oh hey a planet!"

watching them all fly shitty, degraded speeders was amusing

I would wager most of my friends that didn't like this were the same people that didn't like Looper

Yeah, but what the fuck was even the point of that? “Let’s thin the ranks of our pilots a little more, we’re all going to die here anyway”

The newfound sense of humor among the bad guys is straight out of Spaceballs

It's the point where Poe finally learns to be a leader and calls off the run

Xpost

Though i suspect it was also because they believed there was only one entrance and once the ram cracked the door it would be all over. They were also hoping for help.

This is around the point where even Leia is packing it in iirc

Yes that was pretty clear at that point in the movie - it's suicide but we are done if they get the ram to blow the door.
The thing which amuses me about this movie and Empire is the notion that they're delivering troops and fighting gear using starships, but instead of landing them where they want to attack, they set them down a few miles away and then head over on agonisingly slow walking machines. I mean, it's absolutely awesome and I love it, but still.

What I remember one night, Tex and me
Rappelled in on a hot Rebellium L.Z.

Lol otm about First Orders terrible logistics

Man I dunno about this one. So much going on - almost too much - and so much that was downright corny, I thought, mixed in with some great stuff ( especially Mark Hammill's performance and the final 30 minutes of the film). But god there was a lot here that just felt...off.
And I really don't feel a thing for these new characters. Old.

Light speed offensive seemed the *moment* of the film - impressive from a film execution and maybe conceptual perspective. But yeah it didn’t hit me emotionally. Am I dead inside or do I just not give a shit about Laura dern?

I like Laura Dern very much but I'm with you. I just couldn't buy her in this. Some of the casting in these new SW films is just bad or borderline.

I wd be mad about those 2 posts but im high af

Calstars u woukda only enjoyed it if it took place entirely in Moz's cantina

Man I dunno about this one. So much going on - almost too much - and so much that was downright corny

My thoughts exactly on the corniness, from the one-liners and gags to the general vibe (doesn't he diss Captain Phasma as "chrome dome?"). As I watched it, even though I ultimately liked it, at times I kept getting this feeling that it was some strange mix of "Empire" but also "Jedi" (cute animals) and even the prequels (cute Coca-Cola commercial ready kids). Anyway, I thought it was all part of the general OTT space (soap) opera-niness.

Yeah, he did call her "chrome dome".
Loved Luke's weirdo milkman moment, though.

I thought little stable boy kid at the end was gonna do some pop-n-lock dance performance a la Boogaloo Shrimp in "Breakin'". The cheese...

And that Maz Canata scene - wtf ? Yeah - could go on and on.

That scene that lasted two whole minutes?

Yeah, two minutes and it still stunk.

It wasn't a scene, it was a Skype

The way this movie dealt with Snoke, Rey's parentage and Jedi mysticism was awesome, great, moving. Issues are there to be found but man it hits the main chords so well, and all the conspiratorial Star Wars fans complaints only underline its strengths.

I like Laura Dern very much but I'm with you. I just couldn't buy her in this. Some of the casting in these new SW films is just bad or borderline.

fuck you, your hat is horrible (Neanderthal)
Posted: December 17, 2017 at 12:11:32 AM
Calstars u woukda only enjoyed it if it took place entirely in Moz's cantina

Bar Wars? Would watch

forest whitaker in rogue one being maybe a lone misstep

Felicity Jones was the bigger mis-cast in Rogue One - couldn't buy her as badass.

I have to say, per abcfsk's post, that one of the great things about Snoke was that he was set up as the mysterious badass but fairly obviously in a Palpatine 2.0 version and then for all his evident powers he just turned out to be an easily distracted bullshit artist. Like his final look was 'Oh god...that was the stupidest thing I could have done.'

yeah, hubris was his undoing.

I love that Kylo Ren *is* actually a clever, disciplined guy when he's able to keep his emotions in check. His undoing is always his rage, which keeps him unfocused and prevents him from being the ultimate killing machine.

He is tormented because he's never been able to be his own person. He had *two* legacies attempting to dictate his future (Vader and Luke) and neither one is ever able to fully overcome the other. So in a sense, that's why Rey has a leg up on him - her parents being nobodies removes the burden of having expectations to live up to.

If I ever saw this again (no offense, Star Wars, but unlikely) I would count up all the times an ironic turn-around gag was trotted out.

Here's your lightsaber. (throws it away)
"Master, I am the murph bir drab!" (take off that stupid helmet, I can't understand a word you're saying!)
There's the ship! (it blows up) Aw, come on!
I am the most powerful evil leader! (dies)
All you're good for is doing crazy things and blowing stuff up (enemy appears) Do you want me to do something crazy and blow things up?

and xpost Yeah, space walrus breastmilk gag the most wtf thing here. Also, Spaceballs humor in full effect. "For god's sake, put a shirt on or something!" Or my fave dry moment, when Adam Driver is all "shoot them" and the other guy is like "SHOOT THEM!" and Adam driver just turns his head and looks at him, like, no doi.

Oh, and clearly the next movie just when all hope is lost an adorable calvary of freed slave children a la Temple of Doom and Thunderdome will show up riding those freed space horses.

I have a feeling the next film is going to jump forward like 5-10 years or so. not far enough to where you'd be questioning why the characters don't look older than they do, but enough time to allow the Resistance to restore their numbers

also I predict Palpatine finds a way to resurrect himself

Jumping forward that much might be the least worst way to handle lack of Leia also.

opening crawl...

"GENERAL LEIA is dead. Let's just rip that bandaid off."

So uh...is Luke dead? Or was that a projection of a projection? Or is that just how jedis die? Cf Obi Wan in ep 4

he's p obviously dead. I mean...Rey and Leia talk about it 2 minutes later.

he also vanishes

this frees up Mark Hamill to star in Corvette Summer 2

Yoda just vanished when he died too. I mean, he did in Empire. In this movie, he just shows up for no reason and then vanishes again, kind of like R2.

Maybe we'll get an army of Jedi ghost all talking calmly about how they are more powerful than ever while the bad guys blow up planets and stuff.

he doesn't show up for no reason, he shows up to steer Luke back the right direction. he's a force ghost, he ain't gonna stick around long

TIL that Hamill auditioned for Skywalker at the behest of his buddy, Robert Englund!

Did they ever explain why Sith Lords can't ghost it up too? Maybe Snoke could have worked out a way to do it, now purely motivated by revenge against Kylo.

I like the idea of Snoke spending 2 hours as a ghost doing nothing but telling Kylo he's just a little bitch until he slices off his own head to shut him up

So Yoda showed up just to give Luke a generic "just books, page turners they are not" pep talk? Though of course later they show that Daisy saved the books after all.

Given all the suicide and attempted suicide and sacrifice in this and previous movies you'd think the Jedi message would ultimately be that it's better to be dead.