Star Wars 8 shit talk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQKdyaJHglM

however, I do believe that Sidious does lessen the intensity of the Sith lighting attack for Anakin's sake

xxpost Awwwww but it's Carrieeeeeee. How could you saaaay that?

ian mcdiarmid telling The Story of Darth Plagueis while watching the weird iridescent bubble opera is my favorite scene in revenge of the sith

― flamenco drop (BradNelson), Monday, December 18, 2017 12:02 PM (thirty-seven minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

My favorite thing in the entire prequel trilogy

man, remember how mysterious and evil the emperor was before George Lucas decided we needed to see him in episodes 1 - 3?

― mh, Thursday, August 10, 2017 9:06 AM (four months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

how cool would it have been if he only showed up at the tail end of episode 3, and used evil sith magic to enthrall the senate and set himself up as emperor, no real backstory

― mh, Thursday, August 10, 2017 9:07 AM (four months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

just realized that my script notes from a while back were accepted

at the time I felt it was unbelievable how easily the rest of the Republic was duped but the real-life events of the last two years or so has made it seem less crazy

still hate the whole reasoning for Anakin's turn was "dreaming Padme dies in childbirth" like so talk about your concerns w/ her doctor or something idk maybe don't kill all the Jedi

ppl gonna complain about "chrome dome" in the franchise that gave us "move it, goldenrod," "come on, red" and "laugh it up fuzzball" jfc

― Monster fatberg (Phil D.), Sunday, December 17, 2017 5:18 PM (yesterday)

"laugh it up, fuzzball" was said by han to his best friend as a response to being ribbed. finn managed "chrome dome" as he was fighting for his life

still hate the whole reasoning for Anakin's turn was "dreaming Padme dies in childbirth" like so talk about your concerns w/ her doctor or something idk maybe don't kill all the Jedi

― fuck you, your hat is horrible (Neanderthal)

the love of his life looked like an umbrella in a tropical cocktail

sorry for turning this into another prequel discussion lol

Ackbar is a poisoned chalice ftb “it’s a trap!” fame, that was the right amount of time to spend on him.

I felt the humour was a little forced at times, until I got into it. The opening gag with “holding for Hux” felt a little off but a) one of the first lines in TFA is Poe telling Kylo that he can’t hear him with the mask on and b) much as Kylo is cosplaying Vader, Hux is cosplaying the English generals from the originals - if you wanted to stall him, getting him to repeat a blustery speech is a great way to do it.

The one problem there is if we’re ever expected to take Hux seriously, I expected him to say “Well, Really” at any point. On the other hand, Kylo pinging him sideways in the cockpit was a great joke.

Also a shout out to the commander of the first Dreadnaught, whose reaction to his impending destruction is visible irritation.

haha otm. "you got us this time!"

I did love the bomb sequence, with her coming to on her back and the Poe and Dreadnaught commander's slow motion images, the kicking of the ladder to knock down the detonator......

also loved the subversion of the typical "everybody to their X-wings" scramble where nobody even gets to lift off, just gets incinerated

btw...why is no one talking about luke? so, did he die?

yes

nah he's on the shitter at the end of the film

half the next movie is just ghost Luke messing with his nephew

http://blog.angryasianman.com/2017/12/kelly-marie-tran-surprises-fans.html

sidebar: (cf: Phil D batsignal)

anyone got a rec for a good Star Wars podcast that isn’t RebelForce Radio? i don’t like RFR

― Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, December 18, 2017 1:30 AM (thirteen hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

TBH I'm not much of a podcast guy but definitely do not listen to RFR, they're misogynist fuckbois.

xpost -- that story is the best and if anyone disagrees then I hate you and will sb you forever.

I am stupidly happy

It's true I have crossed over to the Dark Side, but if your uniform was that tight, you'd be pretty bloody cross too!

— Adrian Edmondson (@AdrianEdmondson) December 18, 2017

You sucked it in admirably. Been holding onto this one for awhile - one day way back in post production I got bored during an effects review ❤️ pic.twitter.com/HZ7bJU3rmE

— Rian Johnson (@rianjohnson) December 18, 2017

kelly marie tran 4 presidetn

I am also stupidly happy about this too

You CRUSHED it, Ade! A rare addition to the #StarWars mythology: a #FirstOrder officer with an actual wry sense of humor ("humour"?)! Having you in #TheLastJedi was such an honor ("honour"?)! 😜 #MayTheForceBeWithSuperfluousYous #BottomBaddie https://t.co/DYa0LZVHFM

— @HamillHimself (@HamillHimself) December 18, 2017

'BottomBaddie' could be interpreted in many ways here in the U.K....

— Adrian Edmondson (@AdrianEdmondson) December 18, 2017

Is it true that Bowie's "Rebel Rebl " was used in this episode as the Rebel Alliance's thenme?

did they really need a gratuitous shot of shirtless Adam Driver?

ordering vacation matinee ticket

I thought this piece was great, apologies if someone shared earlier:

https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2017/12/star-wars-the-last-jedi-backlash-negative-fan-reactions-rotten-tomatoes-score

some great scenes in this, some glorious visuals (probably some of the best in the series tbh), some bits that got me teary-eyed just out of lifelong affection for the characters. but my god did it need to be four years long? i went for a bathroom break as soon as poe announced "we've got to take out that cannon!" there was a long line from another screening letting out so by the time i got back it was luke talking to leia, yet i'm not convinced i missed anything. maybe some cgi critter antics and more red dust spaceship stuff which admittedly looked cool but man...learn to edit.

nice of the opening crawl to just be like "look, it's basically going to be The Empire Strikes Back with some stuff moved around, what do you want from us?" - it let me accept that early and settle in for the ride. also nakedly abandoning any effort to make the republic/first order/resistance setup feel real or organic - "we just want there to be an empire and some rebels, is that so much to ask?"

cgi yoda was bad. much better once they switched to a puppet for the closeups. at least i think they did. could be a different cgi team. never know these days. leia flying through space with the force was laughably absurd and would be a real jump-the-shark moment if i hadn't completely forgotten it by the next scene.

luke's screed against the jedi and their romanticization was excellent, marred only by him saying "darth sidious" and not "the emperor." i get the irony of me complaining about the line not living up to my ideas of classic star wars but c'mon.... it was the emperor he met. did he read about "darth sidious" somewhere? reminded me of everyone in x-men suddenly calling magneto "erik" after he was retroactively given that name in the early 90s. erik!!!!

but was very glad to be rid of snoke and have rey be rid of fannish silliness about her parentage. if these have to be shiny remakes, at least try to rip the plot free of the original trilogy so there's some chance the third one at least could feel something like a new movie. or do better at maintaining that illusion.

love how finn and rose's entire plotline was irrelevant to the outcome of the story, except i guess it teaches finn to be brave for one line of dialogue with poe. poe's arc was interesting to follow and i'm glad they took him being a mansplaining jerk to laura dern and did something with it but boy does it feel like these characters have to learn the same lessons five times each. one hilarious thing was rose talking about how the most heinous destructive forces in the galaxy are the fossil fuel and resource extrraction magnates who ruined her planet. "and this planet we're on is full of the most heinous destructive people in the galaxy!" "you mean... gasp!" "yes! ARMS DEALERS!" "wait, what?" feels like a last-minute, board-of-directors-friendly edit of something that once made sense, oh well.

some distracting things going on with lighting/continuity on luke's island, where "dawn" seems to be ten in the morning, and where from shot to shot, rey doing her dangerous lightsaber practice on the edge of the cliff is lit from totally different directions. oopsie.

del toro as asshole han solo who does not come back to save them was a cute touch. unless he got redeemed while i was in the bathroom. or blown up. i liked him. he'll flip ya!

as with the last one, but less severely, it needs an edit on the jokes. all good jokes but it'd be a stronger movie with 75% as many of them. agreed with moka - let a scene be a bummer scene or a scary scene for a minute! anyway all the jokes reduce space for information to rest in your mind... no time to establish a little oomph for one scene before we've written over it with another scene. we've barely started to reconsider luke in light of kylo ren's flashback before we're given his version of events. i had the same problem with Moana (which i really liked overall!) so maybe it's a disney thing. also the word "big-ass" should not be in star wars. thanks for reading.

haha I missed the "big ass"

https://www.rockpeaks.com/files/eggs/s/Spinal-Tap/000618-Spinal-Tap-Big-Bottom-Saturday-Night-Live-1984.jpg

Yoda being like “you definitely have not read the ancient jedi texts” to luke is me to EVERYONE who says they’ve read Hegel. no you haven’t, youre just a good liar

— [to the tune of star wars] (@See_Em_Play) December 18, 2017

all yr questions answered

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/kylo-ren-shirtless-last-jedi_us_5a343a2ce4b040881bea8a2f

lol @ ppl needing a reason. that’s adorable

man, the famous Jedi texts that are in none of the 13 hours of Jedi-centric Star Wars films we have, it was so sad to see Luke burn those! and the Tree! dude Darth Vader never shut up about that Jedi Tree.

Jedi Tree was in the background in some of the council scenes of the prequels iirc, along with his partner Master Switch

Loved Luke and Yoda chilling in front of the big bonfire.

the rich on the casino planet make their money by selling women to the first order

Nitpick here, but was it women or weapons? I was under the impression it was weapons.

Ok, who wants the Good Shit?

http://thefederalist.com/2017/12/18/last-jedi-worst-star-wars-movie-ever/

A sampling:

The plot is further degraded by its pointed failure to follow up on the various story points set up by its predecessor, the wonderful “Force Awakens.” One of the best was the mystery of Rey’s parentage, which seemed to promise an exploration of the Jedi’s typically convoluted bloodlines. We discover, however, in a belated revelation, that her parents were “nobodies” completely unconnected to anything remotely interesting

lol that's trolling right? i mean the movie has problems but at a skim most of the claims there are laughable or designed to reveal the reviewer as a complete clod. "objectively bad," ha.

the rich on the casino planet make their money by selling women to the first order

Nitpick here, but was it women or weapons? I was under the impression it was weapons.

― Johnny Fever, Monday, December 18, 2017 7:14 PM (thirteen minutes ago)

oh, i heard women. might have been weapons

Bruneau p impressive how you manage to become tedious in new and inventive ways each week

Johnny was right - it's "weapons"

lol The Federalist reviewing Star Wars in between their Trump fellatio

Found it! Here’s Armond!

http://www.nationalreview.com/article/454666/last-jedi-shape-water-juvenile-political-fantasies

He didn’t like Del Toro’s latest either.

i loved Laura Dern's explosive finale visually even though it meant Star Wars is now ripping off Starcrash (except w dumber heroes).

there's a petition making the rounds for disney to "remove episode VIII from the canon" and honestly when will these fuckin nerds go extinct pls

http://theconcourse.deadspin.com/a-list-of-some-of-the-times-the-last-jedi-told-the-olde-1821396631

I was seriously tired of all of the acrobatics done to make everything conform to a formula with deep reverence for the most superficial details that the franchise had become. The best shit in the original trilogy was the swamp frog man hitting the main character with a stick and telling him not to rely on his assumptions, and there was plenty of that in this one

Has anybody commented that it’s really strange that Leia would spend so much resources and effort in TFA to find Luke, only for him to be hidden out.. in a cabin next to a famous Jedi Tree

It’d be cooler if this movie wasnt 5 hours long.

xpost It was an unmapped island that from space looked like mere ocean. they knew he was going to the original Jedi temple, but nobody actually knew where that was, just knew *of* it