US Politics January 2018: "You All Just Got A Lot Richer"

We were somewhere around DC on the edge of Dupont Circle when the fluorinated water began to take hold.

anyone who attempts to satirize the Trump admin this year is a fool. RT/quote, walk away.

honestly my expected outcome at this point between now and the end of next year Trump does a set of public appearances so incoherent (as in, descending into indecipherable gibberish as opposed to his usual vaguely-decipherable gibberish) that he just makes some lame excuse and bails

Can totally imagine Trump on his deathbed muttering to the two or three people there: "I used to be president!" And they'll look at each other, smile softly, pat him on his head and say: "Sure, pop. Sure."

And then he'll die, and they'll say, phew, at least it happened before he ran for a second term.

If by 'makes some lame excuse and bails' you mean 'shits his pants and dies on the spot', I concur.

If by "look at each other, smile softly, pat him on his head and say: "Sure, pop. Sure."" you mean "ignore Trump and keep checking Twitter on their phones as he flatulently expires", I concur.

as he flatulently expires

Like a balloon losing air.

Like a whoopee cushion.

Like an inflatable mattress after your guest has left.

Like the bounce house after the party.

Last night, I made like Emmerich and tried to imagine what would happen if some misguided party kidnapped the president. Probably something along the lines of, 'so...what's on the agenda today, President Pence?'

Like, how quickly would the entire country conspire to rewrite the history of the past year if he just disappeared?

GOP Senator from Colorado re Sessions move:

This reported action directly contradicts what Attorney General Sessions told me prior to his confirmation. With no prior notice to Congress, the Justice Department has trampled on the will of the voters in CO and other states.

— Cory Gardner (@SenCoryGardner) January 4, 2018

I am prepared to take all steps necessary, including holding DOJ nominees, until the Attorney General lives up to the commitment he made to me prior to his confirmation.

— Cory Gardner (@SenCoryGardner) January 4, 2018

Liberals have already been trying to write Trumpism off as an aberration rather than a natural culmination of steadily-evolving trends, so yeah xp

I always expected trump to try to ban books, I just didn’t think it would be a single book, about him.

And wow this one-two

One of the baffling things about Trumpworld giving access to Wolff: all they needed to do was call Murdoch and he would have said don’t cooperate b/c Wolff had written nasty book on him. And Jared/Trump speak to Murdoch all the time!

— Gabriel Sherman (@gabrielsherman) January 4, 2018

I kept waiting for that call to be made. https://t.co/RGm2SqLbKx

— Michael Wolff (@MichaelWolffNYC) January 4, 2018

Summary: pic.twitter.com/JLBpzQcK0J

— Mike Flacy (@mikeflacy) January 4, 2018

If by 'makes some lame excuse and bails' you mean 'shits his pants and dies on the spot', I concur.

― Bobby Buttrock (Old Lunch), Thursday, January 4, 2018 8:42 AM (ten minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

If by "look at each other, smile softly, pat him on his head and say: "Sure, pop. Sure."" you mean "ignore Trump and keep checking Twitter on their phones as he flatulently expires", I concur.

― "Taste's very strange!" (stevie), Thursday, January 4, 2018 8:43 AM (nine minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

sometimes this thread is a gift

These quotes are funny/terrifying, but my sense is Trump could be removed from office and the nation's taste for such a figure won't have been tempered a bit. You'll just get another demon like him but more competent.

If by 'makes some lame excuse and bails' you mean 'shits his pants and dies on the spot', I concur.

I'm making predictions not wishes

Feels like it might be complacent to call Trump the *culmination* of these trends in American politics and society, rather than just another stage on the descent

These quotes are funny/terrifying, but my sense is Trump could be removed from office and the nation's taste for such a figure won't have been tempered a bit. You'll just get another demon like him but more competent.

― droit au butt (Euler), Thursday, January 4, 2018 9:55 AM (five minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'm not going to say there won't be political candidates who get some serious traction by speaking directly to Trumpist grievance/dem baiting/racism, because there absolutely will be. But I absolutely believe that Trump eked out a win largely on the basis of celebrity/name recognition. If some no-name GOP senator had replicated Trump's campaign note-for-note, he wouldn't have come within spitting distance of the presidency.

Feels like it might be complacent to call Trump the *culmination* of these trends in American politics and society, rather than just another stage on the descent

Yes.

Fortunately I have no idea who most TV celebrities are today, let alone which could be apocalyptic candidates. xp

Republican David Yancey has won the important state race in Virginia's 94th district: his name was picked from the ceramic bowl. The Democrat can request another recount.

— Daniel Dale (@ddale8) January 4, 2018

After a tie-breaking name drawing by Virginia State Board of Elections officials, Republican David Yancey has officially been declared the winner in the 94th Virginia House of Delegates District seat in Newport News.

Yancey, the incumbent, maintains his seat in the House of Delegates after an unconventional end to the Virginia race. Republicans now hold a 51-49 majority in the state House.

xp

guy must have lucky charms

well, looks like republicans in the state of Virginia have their mandate to impose their will on the entire state

let god take the wheel and then drive it off a cliff

really should have been a duel

his name was picked from the ceramic bowl.

In all seriousness, delete America.

The oracle has spoken!

😂😂😂
Scaramucci: Some of us have different views, but lets subordinate all that nonsense and work for the president and knock it off.

Ruhle: Anthony, you said 6 months ago that you think Steve Bannon tries to suck his own penis. pic.twitter.com/a5AAcIVn5o

— Lis Power (@LisPower1) January 4, 2018

"Legislative power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical ceramic ceremony."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8bqQ-C1PSE

lol The book is a bestseller on Amazon and it's not even released

In the span of one day, Michael Wolff’s bombshell book about President Donald Trump and his administration, Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House, moved 48,448 positions up on Amazon’s best-seller list to reach the no. 1 spot. As of 10:00 a.m. ET on Thursday, it has retained its status. (The book is still in pre-order stages; it will be released on Jan. 9.)

can't wait for Trump to take credit for having a new best selling book out

I'm not going to say there won't be political candidates who get some serious traction by speaking directly to Trumpist grievance/dem baiting/racism, because there absolutely will be. But I absolutely believe that Trump eked out a win largely on the basis of celebrity/name recognition. If some no-name GOP senator had replicated Trump's campaign note-for-note, he wouldn't have come within spitting distance of the presidency.

― Bobby Buttrock (Old Lunch), Thursday, January 4, 2018 8:08 AM (forty-four minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it's also important to note he was going up against probably the most hated candidate the democrats could have nominated, the bête noire of the entire GOP establishment and idiot fox viewership and a just-large-enough segment of the left.

and whose stirring get-out-the-vote label was 'Qualified'

xpost

the mooch video is funny but it also saddens me because it reminds me that i can never run for any sort of public office. "KM you argue for policies which remove the incentive for electricity utilities to increase sales as a means of increasing revenue and profits...but a recent comprehensive analysis of your posts on the internet found that you used the word "fartz", with a 'z', more than 750 times in the last ten years, including one period in August 2011 where it was used over 200 times."

Weird scenes etc

Trump on Bannon: “He called me a great man last night...he changed his tune pretty quick.”

Adds: “I don’t talk to him”

— Jordan Fabian (@Jordanfabian) January 4, 2018

xpost You're still stuck in that 2016 way of thinking! There are literally no barriers to entry at this point. You just have to be vehemently unapologetic about the 'fartz'-ing, perhaps even suggesting that those who spell it 'farts' are terrorists who hate America.

damn i was about to que up a morbs addition to the shitty candidate hillary discussion but you beat me to it irl xxxp

Oh, actually, basic decency and a healthy sense of shame are probably barriers to entry now so you may want to work on stamping those qualities into the dirt.

If some no-name GOP senator had replicated Trump's campaign note-for-note, he wouldn't have come within spitting distance of the presidency.

definitely some truth to this. haven't completely awful candidates run in the past and gotten trounced? Trump definitely had an extraordinary sense of shamelessness, unaccountability, and an ability to bait the media that I don't think anyone who has held public office could properly replicate. how did Trumpism do in 2017?

I like how calling him a great man is somehow the opposite of "I believe your son committed treason and you are likely implicated yourself" https://t.co/z4VErrJaHQ

— Benjy Sarlin (@BenjySarlin) January 4, 2018

Also on the fun tip

per @MichaelWolffNYC, @TuckerCarlson was offered the WH press secretary job and declined https://t.co/RNZncw3Jig

— Rosie Gray (@RosieGray) January 4, 2018

can't wait for Trump to take credit for having a new best selling book out

― (•̪●) (carne asada), Thursday, January 4, 2018 4:56 PM (seventeen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this will absolutely happen in some form

While Trump was in most ways a conventional misogynist, in the workplace he was much closer to women than to men. The former he confided in, the latter he held at arm’s length. He liked and needed his office wives and he trusted them with his most important personal issues. Women, according to Trump, were simply more loyal and trustworthy than men. Men might be more forceful and competent, but they were also more likely to have their own agendas. Women, by their nature – or Trump’s version of their nature – were more likely to focus their purpose on a man. A man like Trump.

I'm wondering if a judicious editor forced the attribution of the views to Trump. Either way, gross.

https://s.faketrumptweet.com/jc0re8jw_1iu3z6n_cje3ll.png

that tweet has a KNEEL BEFORE ZOD tone

where is Zod when we need him?

TURMP MAAAAADDDD