Weinsteins step down as Miramax CEOs

I'm removing my bookmark, and am unlikely to return, but have you seen the title of this thread?

Just start a male flirting thread

Maura otm x 1000.

Oh my god

Ridley Scott: I haven’t ruled out Harvey Weinstein making a comeback

 I had no sexual interest in her, just wanted to brighten the day of a middle aged woman stuck behind a desk with no windows.

Maybe she was having a perfectly good day without your fuckin' input.

Xps that link to la lachera’s post - the WHOLE POINT of her post was that she HAD NOT done anything to her hair, that it looked exactly the same as every other time she’d seen this guy, which is why it creeped her out - she wasn’t creeped out that a guy noticed she’d cut her hair, she was creeped out bc he clearly had ulterior motives in saying such a weird and pointless thing to her

(can we move this tangent to another thread because it’s sort of annoying to have this discussion marshaled by men. thank you)

Sure but I don’t think anybody is playing referee here, except you just now, and men are the ones who apparently need shit explained to them in boolean algebra so they don’t come off even worse than they already think they do.

Sanpaku is asking sincere questions and is confessing to ASD symptoms and comorbid side effects, but yeah, let’s tell him and his enablers where to stick it, we’re the problem.

I’d love to live in a world where we don’t need a lifehacker post with bullet points about how to say a nice thing to a person without coming across like an oleaginous blob of erect cocks that can talk but apparently that isn’t in the cards

This conversation is roughly on a par with people who complain that feminism means they can't hold a door open for a woman anymore

I mean if you aren’t holding the door open for everyone you were raised wrong

hell yea

i feel like there is a really big, basic thing that is getting in the way of us understanding each other here and i wish i knew what it was!

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Sunday, January 7, 2018 1:47 AM (seven hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

don't wish to prolong this conversation if ppl think it would be better had somewhere else, but I just wanted to say that I relate to a lot of the confusion that Sanpaku is expressing here, and (cf Tracer) to the feeling of a big basic gap in understanding between myself and other ppl when I read discussions of this stuff, something more fundamental in how you relate to other humans even aside from specific issues of flirting and complimenting etc - I wish I knew what the solution was! (if there is one)

Literally all anyone is suggesting is that this interesting and possibly useful discussion move to its own thread, Tom.

So how bout those Weinsteins eh

not a fan, honestly

for reference: Fired for being nice? a Sanpaku help thread

Well that's kinda dickish. Digression was interesting, and my male flirting/etc behaviour or whatever thread idea was a serious suggestion. Could actually be useful, even.

that's not a flirting thread! but i suppose it could be used for that purpose? i have asked for a retitle tho so it's a little less dickish :)

I've retitled that thread per Tracers request in MRF and I hope Sanpaku sticks around to particpate in it or to continue to participate in this one.

I do want to say that I think it's lame that so many people suggested that Sanpaku leave the thread. His thoughts and questions were relevant to the discussion and well-intentioned. There are necessarily going to be people in the wake of huge events like these who want to seek clarification about the issues that have been raised. It doesn't benefit anybody to shut them down.

I think it was a digression that needed its own thread

I think this is a good thread not to be too clueless in

I think that if that thread were to become a thread where similar shutdown requests were made and subsequently treated as disobeyed orders then ilx needs to have a chat about that maybe

I do want to say that I think it's lame that so many people suggested that Sanpaku leave the thread. His thoughts and questions were relevant to the discussion and well-intentioned. There are necessarily going to be people in the wake of huge events like these who want to seek clarification about the issues that have been raised. It doesn't benefit anybody to shut them down.

― how's life, Sunday, January 7, 2018

OTM. I'd also like to add that telling Sanpaku to 'git gud' (as the gamers say) is incredibly counterproductive, even harmful. For everyone.

well, i did not expect to find my name pop up in here, or that not-exactly-relevant-to-workplace-harassment comment about the hair* -- which was weird for ways i obviously can't explain well enough because of the profound comprehension gap this thread is currently experiencing. a good place to start: don't actively flirt with your coworkers.

* Justine was partially right, but also 1) this did not happen at work 2) i did not intuit sexual menace from this comment 3) it struck me as memorable because of how scripted it felt, like it was from a reader's digest "list of things to say to women if you want to make a positive impression" 4) this is why the word "creepy" is grossly insufficient and way too vague for describing the range of dnw behaviors we are trying to help people avoid

good luck everyone.

"This conversation is roughly on a par with people who complain that feminism means they can't hold a door open for a woman anymore

― Chuck_Tatum,"

haha, yes, I just popped in here and baffled by this shit. but you know, that NYT op-ed by Merkin kind of leaned in that direction. FFS.

seriously
it's disingenuous at best

i’m just speaking as me, not for anyone else

it’s hard enough to wrestle with the high profile rape, abuse & harassment that this thead was revived to ultimately discuss.

i don’t want to come here for that ~and~ to help some of you interrogate how to be around women or how to flirt or what is acceptable behaviour. it’s too much. and for me in the current time, even though they’re all part of the same thing, for now they kind of have to be separate discussions. i think the seriousness of the high profile stuff needs to be dealt with and weighed on its own here, and the out in the world flirting/interactions “how to be” wrestled with elsewhere.

you can talk about it. you’re not being silenced or gagged. i just would rather not have to have that conversation here along with it. because it’s too much.

It's like you can't even compliment a woman on her haircut by telling her you'd like to smell her hair anymore

Sorry all I misinterpreted Maura’s post and clearly overreacted.

You gotta stick to that bedtime, buddy

Sure but I don’t think anybody is playing referee here, except you just now, and men are the ones who apparently need shit explained to them in boolean algebra so they don’t come off even worse than they already think they do.

Sanpaku is asking sincere questions and is confessing to ASD symptoms and comorbid side effects, but yeah, let’s tell him and his enablers where to stick it, we’re the problem.

yeah this was weird, condescending, kind of defensive overreaction. probably shouldn't accuse women of "playing referee" esp in this thread.

it's made pretty clear how to not be a jerk in public and professional settings. i don't get the outpouring of self-pity for the man who now has to question shit before he does it. like, we all make sacrifices, every day, to live in society. grow the fuck up.

thank you vg for articulating my discomfort.

np <3

also daphne merkin sucks

silby stop being my mom

Craig McLachlan unchecked: https://t.co/biEDXY4Mz1

ugh

and his denials in that piece

yuuuuuk

tonight should be interesting. saw some more posters go up in LA with Seth Meyers and others on them captioned "WE ALL KNOW," assuming it's more conservative astro-turfing.

sorry, "WE ALL KNEW*"

and his denials in that piece


"I totally didn't do any of this, but if I had, these women would be pissweak for not understanding the vibrant sexual environment of a Rocky Horror production"

Yeah I find myself utterly unsurprised that McLachlan is an asshole, thats a disgusting story and for him to just outright dismiss all the people telling it is gross.

like why would you ever go on record in such a vile condescending manner

unless you are a raging egomaniac which he clearly is

guh

i saw his first run in Rocky back in 92 when I was in high school. not sure what to do with that now.
at the time i enjoyed it. oh well.
bleh

Daphne Merkin does suck. I know her from her weird descriptions of the vagina.

@dtortorici
It’s come to my attention that a legacy print magazine is planning to publish a piece “outing” the woman who started the Shitty Media Men list. All I can say is: don’t. The risk of doxxing is high. It’s not the right thing to do.

@Nicole_Cliffe
My unconfirmed intel on this is that it’s Harper’s but I would sure welcome a denial by Harper’s or, if it’s true, a decision to reconsider before the women of media never ever ever write for Harper’s again.

@Nicole_Cliffe
If it IS Katie Roiphe for @Harpers, which I have now heard from two different sources, the backlash is well and truly here and it will NOT be pretty.

oh lord

now Stan Lee? christ

http://www.france24.com/en/20180109-france-star-catherine-deneuve-defends-mens-right-chat-women-metoo-weinstein

France, a paradise for women...... (irony irony)

Ugh, Katie Roiphe.

WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT ALL THE SLIMY LADIES OF THE '90S COMING BACK

Can't wait for the return of the Shalit sisters.

now Stan Lee? christ

not... not Stan Lee

of all people to be accused of exploiting workers

of... of using an avuncular cover persona to take rapacious advantage of underpaid employees

who would dare suggest that Stan Lee, of all people, would abuse a position of power and privilege

that he would repeatedly belittle financial dependents with mocking language that reinforced his dominance

how could he go against a lifetime of showing care, respect and honour to people whose destiny he influenced