Star Wars Anthology shit talk (Rogue One, Young Solo, TBD)

That Wee Robot That Cuts About the Death Star: A Star Wars Story
That Wean Anakin Murders Wae a Lightsaber: A Star Wars Story
That Arsepiece That Runs a 1950s Diner: A Star Wars Story
That Shite R2 Unit That Uncle Owen Didnae Buy: A Star Wars Story
Yer Da: A Star Wars Story

— Andy Kelly (@ultrabrilliant) June 21, 2018

Best Star Wars fan theory that is both dumb and great: Luke didn’t die, he just felt really homesick after seeing the dual sunset and he force teleported home to Tatooine

Also before dying Snoke actually found a way to use the cloning technology to clone himself as a younger unravaged specimen and it turns out he looks EXACTLY like Paul Bettany.

You guys are going to turn me to the Shakey Mo side pretty soon

All of the new characters are clones of characters from the original trilogy, iirc. Except BB-8, which is just Yaddle running around in a robotic hamster ball.

infinite snokes

https://slate.com/culture/2018/06/star-wars-fans-campaign-to-remake-the-last-jedi-explained.html

Who’s behind the remake effort?

An individual or a group that’s channeling the imagination-capturing heroism of Luke, Leia, Han, Rey, and Finn by … staying anonymous.

What do they want?

Another version of The Last Jedi—one that, according to the campaign’s Twitter account, isn’t “juvenile,” “unconscionable,” or “blasphemy.” The remaker(s) don’t have a storyline or even a protagonist in mind—they’re just certain that their fantasy version will be better than the movie that already exists. Per their plan, the remakers “will be consulting with Star Wars fans directly throughout the writing of the remake … to make a version of TLJ that is as close to universally accepted as possible.” They do acknowledge the impossibility of pleasing everyone, so they might have to prepare for a potential Remake the Remake of The Last Jedi campaign, and the Remake the Remake of the Remake of The Last Jedi campaign, and so on. Because that’s how fandom works!

As someone who loves to watch bad films I'm really hoping this happens on some level.

all the best stories are made by committee, what could possibly go wrong

lol wow. should be on Star Wars 8 shit talk but yeah that's hilarious

First trailer for the anime-styled "Star Wars: Resistance" coming in October.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bH_Ws7sA468

Lovely looking animation.

Tried watching SOLO, gave up around 40mins in. Really uninspired meat & potatoes stuff. Cunning to cast a lead actor who doesn't look, sound or move like Harrison Ford, and to completely waste Thandie Newton. Felt like a big-budget fan film. It's possible Phoebe Waller-Bridge saves this thing further in, but I doubt it.

it is a mystery!

It's possible Phoebe Waller-Bridge saves this thing

allow me to reassure you: she does not

this movie rules fuiud

It was dire. Every plot beat and laboured callback telegraphed miles in advance, charmless leads (stop trying to make Emilia Clarke happen), and it felt about five hours long

https://www.starwars.com/news/the-mandalorian-revealed

Production on the first Star Wars live-action streaming series has begun! After the stories of Jango and Boba Fett, another warrior emerges in the Star Wars universe. The Mandalorian is set after the fall of the Empire and before the emergence of the First Order. We follow the travails of a lone gunfighter in the outer reaches of the galaxy far from the authority of the New Republic. The series will be written and executive produced by Emmy-nominated producer and actor Jon Favreau, as previously announced, with Dave Filoni (Star Wars: The Clone Wars, Star Wars Rebels) directing the first episode. Additional episodic directors include Deborah Chow (Jessica Jones), Rick Famuyiwa (Dope), Bryce Dallas Howard (Solemates), and Taika Waititi (Thor: Ragnarok). It will be executive produced by Jon Favreau, Dave Filoni, Kathleen Kennedy, and Colin Wilson. Karen Gilchrist will serve as co-executive producer. Stay tuned to StarWars.com for updates.

https://starwarsblog.starwars.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/the-mandalorian-1024x809.jpg

the first TV series based entirely on a cool helmet design

Is this going to be like a Boba Fett improv show filmed at Disney World?

“We can’t justify an entire Fett movie after the Solo failure, team.”
“But the helmet is SO COOL.”
“I know, let’s do a TV series just about the helmet. Pretend it was never meant to be about Bobba.”

I wish they hadn’t desaturates the hell out of Solo.

Wothisface might have been dressed like Harrison Ford and tutored on some of his mannerisms but he’s got approximately 0% of his charm.

It’s an ok Star Wars universe caper movie though. I enjoyed it. Just didn’t think it was amazing.

I feel like the way to do a Boba spin-off is to tell it mainly from the point of view of a group of people being hunted, who are ostensibly the protagonists although we're really watching to see them get disintegrated. Just like how the killer is the real star in slasher movies. Play up the mystery and fearsomeness of the relentless pursuer.

So basically another Predator sequel

They have never addressed the pred ship visible in the Battle of Endor

i've come around to thinking SOLO would have been a pleasantly forgettable, occasionally incompetent, B minus/C plus level space adventure set in the star wars universeb if ehrenreich's character had just been designated as some previously unheard-of nobody. "San Holo," say. so maybe a more generic kind of TV show, just slightly further away from the established characters, is actually the right way to go.

problem is so much of that movie is (sold on) callbacks. Lando! Chewie! Kessel Run!

a more generic kind of TV show, just slightly further away from the established characters, is actually the right way to go.

This was the best aspect of Clone Wars and Rebels (and hey, Rogue One) so yes, it is definitely the right way to go.

Also the mandalorian character is the coolest one on Rebels

Unfortunately whenever a plot starts veering into mandalore’s culture and politics I tend to tune out so hopefully they avoid that nonsense

i saw solo on the plane on monday, first of the new star wars movies id seen. would've been the worst movie id seen in years if i hadn't watched life of the party and father figures on the same flight

fwiw it's definitely the weakest of the new ones.

I watched Solo on a plane two weeks ago and liked it much more than I thought I would. A lot of this probably has to do with the fact that it was a shiny newly refurbished plane with movies on a flight that normally is old shitty planes with no movies.

Also my kid is almost four and for the first time ever played quietly on the ipad and watched the first fifteen minutes of a dozen movies during a flight instead of needing constant attention, so I was shocked and amazed that I got to watch an entire movie uninterrupted.

as someone who got off the star wars train after going to see episode 1 as a teenager just after it opened i somehow still got really canon-geek why-did-you-ruin-this about things like his surname, the kessel run, darth maul's reappearance, han having essentially helped create the rebellion despite the most important fact about him at the start of a new hope being that he is a mercenary who wants no part in that shit blaah

So glad I skipped this

jim, have i got a thread for you!

good thread

Cringed so hard and so fast at the ".. equal rights?" 'joke' that i almost did myself a mischief.

Diff'rent Snokes: A Star Wars Story

Finally got round to watching the rest of this while recovering from food poisoning. It was mildly better than the food poisoning, but less exciting.

I also watched a little over an hour of it on a plane and hated almost everything about it, aside from some production design that was wasted.

this is actually pretty cool - machine learning inserts harrison ford into solo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANXucrz7Hjs

Rogue One on UK netflix, thought I'd watch it again (second time only) as a comfort movie, it totally hit the spot. The plot and editing niggles were largely ignorable, some great set pieces and no significant longueurs; the emotional depth was provided more by the horrors-of-war-lite theme than individual characters but that's fine, it still had the heart and soul (and looks of course) of a Star Wars film; k2-s0 was a+ comic relief. Cushing looked terrible though, really stood out as a videogame character in a live action film. Carrie Fisher not so much.

i wonder if they'll be able to resist that videogame character trick if they make another movie set in the classic era

Diego Luna reprising his Rogue One role in a live-action series for Disney's new streaming service: https://www.starwars.com/news/cassian-andor-live-action-series-announced

Pedro Pascal taking the lead role in the The Mandalorian TV series: https://variety.com/2018/film/news/star-wars-pedro-pascal-mandalorian-series-1203023818/

Fuck yeah SW POC!

The CGI Cushing is a weird case. I knew at once watching it that it was a recreation, but several people I know who didn't know who Cushing was had no idea he wasn't a real actor in the film. The uncanniness does seem to depend on prior knowledge.

OK, this show is going to be . . . something.

https://www.starwars.com/news/pedro-pascal-revealed-as-the-mandalorian

Pedro Pascal (Narcos) has been cast in the title role as a lone Mandalorian gunfighter in the outer reaches of the galaxy. He is joined by Gina Carano (Deadpool), Giancarlo Esposito (Breaking Bad), Emily Swallow (Supernatural), Carl Weathers (Predator), Omid Abtahi (American Gods), Werner Herzog (Grizzly Man), and Nick Nolte (Affliction).

wtf

STAR WARS: THE MANDALORIAN

EXT. MANDALORE - DAY

CARL WEATHERS fires a blaster at WERNER HERZOG’s hip.

WERNER HERZOG
It was not a significant blast; I am not afraid.

— hikikomori povich (@SarahSahim) December 12, 2018

already more interesting that solo

that’s an... electic cast