Swiping people left and right: the Tinder/hook-up culture discussion

i only like shirt men

three or four shirts at once, can't get enough shirts

might want to double-think who the most publicized multi-shirt-wearers are before committing to that one

what is bannon's height

i only like shirt men

three or four shirts at once, can't get enough shirts

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 23 July 2018 18:28 (thirty-nine minutes ago) Permalink

Ralph Fiennes in Spider is p much your perfect man

xp. bannon is slightly short, I'm guessing 5'8", 5'9"

i def have "no burners" on my tinder prof. im closed minded sorry!

I thought "but you're messaging on the app, you don't need disposable phones"

then remember, oh.. yeah.

bay area lol

all shirt, no bannon

i'm a 30 year old straight, white, male. i've been single for nearly 3 years and i haven't really thought much about it until recently. i've never uploaded a picture of myself to the internet or even taken a selfie, and i do not engage in social media in anyway because it all seems so narcissistic to me. i only post here when i'm drinking and i've been lurking for damn near 10 years now.

my question is this, should i get a wild hair, and dip my toe into the online dating world, be it tinder or something else, how odd is it that i have no online presence to account for? It seems like the first thing I would do, if i got a match with someone, would be to check google.com to see if they were real. do i need to create a facebook page to prove that I exist and that people can tolerate me?

i'm very happy with my life right now but it would be silly to pretend that i'll never want any other companionship down the road and i seem ill prepared for today's dating world. are people crosschecking profiles or am i prematurely worried about nothing? if i exist, and there no one to tweet about it, do i really exist?

in my experience, your instagram feed is generally the thing people check to make sure you're not a murderer

just do whatever you feel is righteous and own that shit buddy

dd85 -

but what happens with the person you're interested in doesn't have a instragram feed? can i just put "not a murderer" in my profile and that will suffice or does not having and instagram automatically make me murderer material?

make I Am Not A Murderer your username imo

hello from another longtime lurker who only posts when something super pertinent comes up / the Go-Betweens are mentioned

my partner had zero social media when we met online. it felt odd but also of a piece with his character, might have even made him a bit more interesting to me. it also removed a lot of early dating pitfalls (daydream gazing at profiles / snap character judgements / friend request etiquette etc.). so I wouldn't worry, setting up an online life that doesn't feel authentic to you just for this would probably feel weirder and sweatier to both parties than some fruitless Google searches imo

xps i didn't have an instagram when i rejoined the dating pool but on the advice of my sister i decided to create one because it makes things slightly easier. despite my strong cynicism towards the platform and culture, i was finally convinced with the argument that "no one ever wishes they took fewer pictures"

saint augustine iirc

i only post here when i'm drinking

you've been posting a lot lately!! take it easy buddy

the smaller the online footprint the hotter they are ime

as someone very online i 100% agree that i prefer meeting ppl who are not very online

also the normalisation of everyone having a big presence to be browsed by potential customers is gross and excludes a lot of ppl who have certain jobs/stalkers/sufficient self-respect

If you think it'll be a big deal, I'd say just find a way to mention it in your profile. You expressed it pretty well above - the obvious question would be are you then looking for someone who also doesn't have much of a presence?

Jesus, I’m in love and this is the simultaneous worst and best thing to happen to me in years

rt

falling in love rocks

Unfortunately sometimes rocks like getting into a new drug

https://www.twincities.com/2020/02/09/elite-matchmaker-tinder-valentines-stillwater-love/

In her initial interview with potential clients, Fultz asks if they are open to feedback and suggestions. “If you’re not, you know, that’s kind of defeating the purpose,” she said. “Why would you go to a personal trainer at the gym if you’re not going to follow the recommendations?”

Among Fultz’s feedback: No swearing. No chewing with your mouth open. Don’t show too much skin. Don’t have more than three drinks on a date. Don’t move too fast physically.

Fultz’s clients are guaranteed at least three dates during each six-month session, but they often go on multiple dates with their match. If clients begin dating a match, they can put their membership “on hold” for as long as they want, she said.

that's almost $3000 per date

if we followed the three drink rule, I never would have had my best relationship ten years ago.

but I realize three drinks affect people differently.

have there been, like, scholarly studies of 21st century american yuppies and their dogs? b/c jesus christ, there are more dogs than people here

Girl I’ve been seeing broke things off this morning and I actually think I’m going to take a solid break from swiping—this shit has gotten too stressful and too distracting

after a six year(ish) break I am amused to see that the meat-market dynamics are still exactly the same but the app has been considerably "gamified" and paywalled in addition to continuing to have the worst UI of any popular app

I hate that I ever used this. I hate this era.

Glad to be married and old. My hair is even graying now which is good. The zeitgeist is exhausting.

what do you mean? married people do great on tinder lol

being married sounds amazing. modern "dating" was so stressful to me that i only really briefly experimented with it, and now i've dropped out for a while unless something emerges on its own

― Treeship, Saturday, December 13, 2014 9:28 PM (six years ago) bookmarkflaglink

Is it everything you imagined treeship?

I think this Polish pilot I'm talking to might be a bot. 50/50. Her backstory is very specific but she communicates in a botlike way.

― Treeship, Wednesday, May 25, 2016 9:46 PM (five years ago) bookmarkflaglink

I'm assuming you married the Polish pilot bot btw

met my current partner on this terrible app so it has that going for it

what does it mean when ppl say they were banned from the other apps? I've seen this a few times. the ppl in question don't appear to be fash or linking their onlyfans

I'm just swiping and reading profiles for the foreseeable tbh, more than anything I find it interesting to see how people use apps like this

Lmao. I don’t think I ever met that Polish pilot irl. My current wife is someone who was just a friend in those cold dark days of swiping around.

I was banned from tinder once for being too handsome, sweet and open. Hope this helps.

what do you mean? married people do great on tinder lol

― intern at pelican brief consulting (Simon H.), Thursday, May 27, 2021 11:27 AM (forty-seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

when my wife was trying to do femme for femme dating on tinder married people were a scourged because she'd swipe to some babe and often the other pictures would include the husband and the description would note they were looking for a third

the unicorn hunt is real

Polyamarous types are often looking to bring on a younger third, hoping that this youth will invigorate their relationship. They are like vampires in this way.

No judgment, i meant vampiric descriptively

Lmao. I don’t think I ever met that Polish pilot irl. My current wife is someone who was just a friend in those cold dark days of swiping around.

― treeship., Thursday, May 27, 2021 2:14 PM (seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

Just out of curiosity do you introduce her to people as "my current wife"

No

Only wife, now and forever. I was following brad’s lead when they discussed their current partner.

i call mine wife number 2

I can only hear that in Kurt Wagner's voice