Why do people leave ILX for good?

in what way is calling someone who isn't trolling a troll not personal

this merits a discussion that can be separated from the current instance but this is v def not a correct drawing of any actual rule hard or soft in place

― liberally social (darraghmac), Friday, August 17, 2018 9:32 AM (three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Okay then, it's my implicit rule, at least. Clearly it is not widely practiced.

There are, one assumes, reasons why most people do not post here under their full govt. name. As such, bridging that ILX/IRL gap against an ILXor's wishes seems like Bad Form.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life it’s that if someone’s feelings are hurt it doesn’t really help to explain to them why their feelings shouldn’t be hurt.

Hope you have a good weekend Katherine

in what way is calling someone who isn't trolling a troll not personal

― aloha darkness my old friend (katherine), Friday, August 17, 2018 10:40 AM (twenty-three seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

calling someone "a troll" is basically saying "I don't believe this particular argument is here for any reason but to provoke."

It may be totally untrue, but unless someone is calling you a career troll or a serial maker-upper or Pitchfork Milo, it's a bit of a stretch to call that "personal"

i honestly think the bigger issue was the context of how it was dragged in. i could be wrong but i doubt it would have been this much of an issue if deej was like, "i took exception to so and so's review of blah blah because of x, would like to hear more about what they think about it"

i feel like that's exactly what deej did

albeit in his way

treeship turning a conversation about internet posting into an examination of civility and manners

the exact wording was "let's make this thread more about the music and less about the various trolls," which seems personal to me, particularly when I wasn't the one who brought the argument into the thread

ILX could do with its own Miss Manners, fr reals.

I nominate Treeship

i do think the continued fixation on the word troll when other people in the thread explicitly disagreed with the usage of the word and the person himself apologized for using the word (i think) has outlived its usefulness to this discussion...

There are, one assumes, reasons why most people do not post here under their full govt. name. As such, bridging that ILX/IRL gap against an ILXor's wishes seems like Bad Form.

― Melted Belts, Priced To Move (Old Lunch), Friday, August 17, 2018 10:41 AM (four minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

there are also reasons why everyone else would assume that someone who posts here under half their government name and has consistently identified themselves as a professional music writer would not be overly concerned about bridging the ilx/non-ilx gap on the topic of.....music and music writing.

we have certainly had posters who have requested that certain aspects and identifiers of their RL be kept off-board and those wishes have often been respected. now that this poster has expressed their wishes i guess those can be respected too, even if they don't really make a lot of sense.

apologizing for using a word does not erase the fact that it was used, nor does it erase the repercussions

since when can't we fucking say "troll"?

it's fine to talk about trolls when someone is actually trolling

i'm guess i'm unclear on what the repercussions were re the specific use of the word troll (which was rebuked immediately) vs say the posting of the link in the first place

if we're going to talk about it being rebuked immediately then it should probably be noted that last night it was doubled down upon by someone else entirely: "I'm starting to think you really are a troll"

ILX could do with its own Miss Manners, fr reals.

― Melted Belts, Priced To Move (Old Lunch), Friday, 17 August 2018 14:47 (six minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh this role v def covered

i think CAD is otm but that its also not exactly the same as just engaging with "ilx username x" either and that should be reasonably negotiated

xps i dont think you can stop ppl calling other ppl trolls tbph

(for the record, I don't post here or write about my music under my government name)

it's fine to talk about trolls when someone is actually trolling

― aloha darkness my old friend (katherine), Friday, August 17, 2018 10:57 AM (nineteen seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

That's is like seeing one of those J0rdan S. posts when he's like "Rivers Cuomo should be prosecuted for hate crimes for the opening lines of 'Buddy Holly'" and being like "actually, that should be reserved for actual hate groups"

if we're going to talk about it being rebuked immediately then it should probably be noted that last night it was doubled down upon by someone else entirely: "I'm starting to think you really are a troll"

― aloha darkness my old friend (katherine), Friday, August 17, 2018 10:58 AM (fifty-four seconds ago) Bookmark

ok i don't remember that but i'm still unclear on what the repercussions were

Look, everyone here knows who I am IRL but this is where I go to get away from constantly discussing my prop comedy and my shock of wild red hair and my fabulous, muscular physique. I understand that people are puzzled by my reluctance to make the most of my a-list celebrity, but I appreciate the preservation of my anonymity more than words or a toilet seat with a rear-view mirror glued to it could possibly express.

lmao

xxp lol don't we have a thread cataloguing and praising J0rdan's hyperbole though

Oh, so that's why they called you 'haircare'.

brb going to OKCupid to find who fits OL's profile

the repercussions are that an indeterminate number of people are now angry at me or think less of me; there could potentially also be career repercussions as well

like, for instance, I am probably going to be actively job searching in several years. my pseudonym already has at least one site calling me a bad writer prominent in the first results. I have no idea what to do with this. if I include it then prospective employers might see that and be put off by it. if I leave the pseudonym off then my resume has a several years' gap.

I'm going to wager that literally zero people on ILX are or were angry at you, and any editor that doesn't give you work because you don't stan Carly Rae Blood Sausage is a huge herb

for the record i blame turrican and lbi for extending the convo unnecessarily

― princess of hell (BradNelson), Friday, August 17, 2018 1:50 PM (fifty-one minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

While I appreciate that you love a good scapegoat, I had nothing to do with the current clusterfuck on that thread. The way katherine was targeted on that thread was not on - but unfortunately unsurprising.

(it also doesn't help that the field -- I don't want to go into details -- is notorious for firing and/or suspending people based on things they say or do in their personal life, and has gotten significantly worse about this after 2016. there's a reason I rarely post about politics, for instance, under my government name, unless it's things like "putting children in cages is bad," and even that kind of thing has cost people jobs in this field)

(it isn't music writing)

i think extrapolating all of that based off a few posts in a 5,000 post thread about the 1975 is allowing yourself to spiral to places that are unrealistic and unhealthy but that's just my opinion

it isn't really unrealistic when scouring people's old social media posts, going back years and thousands of posts, is a thing that happens in today's world

the post has been googleproofed

katherine, i do think it's smart for everyone to be careful in what they post these days, but I honestly cannot fathom an army of pepes demanding you should be fired from a job because you don't like the 1975

do "pepes" (alt righters?) especially like the 1975? i need a vox explainer

well, sure, in this case it isn't the alt-righters I'm worried about

Do u ppl ever just relax and have fun or do u argue abt everything

them's fightin words

i’d think they’d find matty to be a beta

(xp)

Do u ppl ever just relax and have fun or do u argue abt everything

― F# A# (∞), Friday, August 17, 2018 11:28 AM (five minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

arguing about things is the opposite of fun, which is why I try to avoid it at all costs. unfortunately, in this case, I didn't avoid it hard enough I guess

tbh I think there's a line between "don't have haters" and "don't engage the haters" that's being blurred here

I don't quite understand what you mean but not originally posting to that thread where my opinion was likely to get me yelled at was my way of not engaging

right path, imo

apparently it wasn't the right path because even that wasn't enough