Why do people leave ILX for good?

in virtually every forum I have ever participated in, not to mention the current discourse about twitter trolls, calling someone a troll is saying that they are doing something just to upset people and that in an ideal world they should be banned, silenced, or ignored.

i immediately corrected & said to read that post as 'makes me feel insane'

but even in its original form that phrasing is mere message board hyperbole, obviously i don't literally feel insane nor do i think you are insane

ironically the exact thing i was protesting was the kind of literalism that insists a song's lyrics can only ever be interpreted as endorsing the thing they say

except that isn't what I did at all, my argument was more along the lines of "it is very difficult to make a war movie that doesn't inadvertently glorify war, and even if you do, don't be surprised if people don't like or want to watch it based on their experiences with war"

this is the *idea* that you argued I was critical of, which again, was an idea, not you personally

anyway i don't think this conversation is at all helpful, at the risk of 'throwing bombs' there's a lot of unhelpful "man up" type advice being thrown her way but i think justin3's pt is fair...this convo should probably just end i think we've wrung enough faux drama from this stone! its also being blown out of proportion bc bored office workers on ilx need something to do

except that isn't what I did at all, my argument was more along the lines of "it is very difficult to make a war movie that doesn't inadvertently glorify war, and even if you do, don't be surprised if people don't like or want to watch it based on their experiences with war"

― aloha darkness my old friend (katherine), Friday, August 17, 2018 12:57 PM (twenty-eight seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well i dont disagree w this point so it sounds like it's largely a misunderstanding of each other's position

or as a great artist once said, hardening positions based on miscommunication

i def ain’t got shit to do today in the office

katherine you didn't 'upset' me, i am more extremely confused as to what outcome might satisfy you here. the best way to get people to stop talking is to not respond! which sucks but that's asynchronous communication for you. as for other outcomes, we can't go back in time and excise the word 'troll' and its variants from earlier posts (although rereading makes one realize that despite k3vin's post, multiple people said explicitly they were not referring to you as a "troll" and were affording you a respect far apart from that thread's no. 1 menace – this was even before everything blew up.

it's hard having your work in the public eye, but saying "whatever, difference of opinion" and moving on is the only way to go when you're dealing with lower-stakes stuff like message board posts (obviously increased threats to your personhood etc are different – and before you object and say this is among them, i seriously doubt that anyone with one of the dwindling editorial jobs out there marked your name down as a result of an argument on a - let's be honest - dwindling message board). saying "i don't want to discuss this" and then spending hours of your day doing exactly that is extremely counterproductive for everyone, but ESPECIALLY for you, because it just winds up being a lot of wasted energy. unless you have, like i said above, a desired result here? if so, what is it?

xp

yeah the people offering advice are the unhelpful ones, not the twats who made her upset in the 1st place

i’ve got a thing where i vocalize too many of my opinions

― Trϵϵship, 17. august 2018 19:52 (six minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

New board description

yeah the people offering advice are the unhelpful ones, not the twats who made her upset in the 1st place

― A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Friday, August 17, 2018 1:03 PM (one minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

accreate

I know I can be a twat here but man you take the cake, hats off to ya

I mean, I stopped responding for several hours when I fell asleep, and that did not get people to stop talking because when I woke up it was still going. someone posted 15 minutes ago to keep it going, without any prompting from me.

(and I realize that people told them that post was counterproductive, but it still happened)

its bc ppl are bored and love drama & we made things temporarily interesting for them but now its run its course, imho

as far as the desired outcome, this may be impossible, but that it doesn't affect my life going forward (this isn't just about people here -- a desired outcome, for instance, is that my boss does not fire me for being visibly upset at my desk for over five hours).

the other is that if someone is a stan of a band that they do not engage with me over that band, unless I engage with them first. posting on a different website doesn't count as engaging and it most definitely does not count as trolling.

oh, I guess another thing I wish wouldn't happen is the non-accusation accusation, the "I don't think you're doing this, but this JUST HAPPENS to remind me of something people do that I think is bad/morally bankrupt/etc. Of course I don't think you're doing this, but I just had to bring it up anyway!"

are you sure you want this to stop

I mean, I'm going to have to actively worry about it for at least this weekend, for reasons I don't really want to get into

I do not think anyone is "a pathetic asshole" based on posts on this board.

― aloha darkness my old friend (katherine), Saturday, August 18, 2018 3:01 AM (fifty-four minutes ago)

not enough time on ilx imo

I used to like browsing ilxor. I still do but I used to as well.

i'm not drinking anymore...but i'm not drinking any less

anyway, katherine, justine is otm here (also Granny and maura) - hope you can go and sit in the sun in a park with an IRL person, or pat a wandering cat, or something, and try and gradually let this recede. but pouring more words into this dumb white box is really not going to help the situation you fear or your perspective on it.

asking deej to disengage in an ilx music-argument-turned-moratorium-on-identity has worked in the past. but only twice so far, out of 976 cases.

speaking of insane its wild how im now ilx's bad apple lmfao remember when me jordan & kevin keller were accused of having 'no personality'

there hasn't even been any direct bullying in this entire ordeal, old ilx would have eaten this alive but nu ilx sternly reprimands three what were for most of its history relatively innocuous posters

if it bother you

you should atop being a shit

You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain

I don't recall ever saying anyone had "no personality"?

there was a whole chaki thread about it

and I don't know, the takeaway from this increasingly seems to be "please shut up and take it while other people yell at you"

if it bother you

you should atop being a shit

― flaneur brayin (darraghmac), Friday, August 17, 2018 1:39 PM (fifty-five seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it does not bother me

this wasnt about me, it was about ilx's radically shifting mores

xp I don't know who or what a "chaki" is but I don't remember saying that any person had "no personality"

this wasnt about me, it was about ilx's radically shifting mores

― Listen to my homeboy Fantano (D-40), Friday, 17 August 2018 18:41 (sixteen seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well im with u there tbf

xp

No one said you did

ok, apologies, I just got confused because those three posters were the primary posters in the 1975 thread at the time

it's very rude to actual real life trolls to associate them with this behavior, all they want to do is live under bridges and eat goats

I mean, I feel like that if I have to stop responding to questions or comments directed at me, it is equally reasonable that people stop shitposting about it, and I genuinely don't understand why the former is worse than the latter

katherine you will i hope forgive that im surprised/dubious that this has all struck you all a sudden after years on ilx tbh

you should atop being a shit

― flaneur brayin (darraghmac), 17. august 2018 20:39 (four minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

He is a-topping it on a weekly basis

the thing is, in other arguments, I can see how they happened because I posted in the thread. this was not a result of something I posted in a thread but something I wrote on an entirely different website, that I did not solicit an argument on

OK, drawing another line. No one post underneath this line. Thank you.

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and again, nobody is saying you have to stop posting about it, just that it may be wise for you to do so.

not many are going to suggest actually stopping anyone else discussing what you posted publicly about a band id imagine

ban darraghmac

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whats this weird line thing, i--oh sorry

People are suggesting it because

1. It may be beneficial to your sense of well-being

2. It's one less source of oxygen for a played out argument you claim you'd like to see end.

It 8s not being suggested because they don't want you posting here.

Liney G. Lineguardin

Bahn mi, muh pho.

___________________________________________________________

People are suggesting it because

1. It may be beneficial to your sense of well-being

2. It's one less source of oxygen for a played out argument you claim you'd like to see end.

the same could be said for virtually all of the past few posts

lookit

suit yourself

xp

Except those posters haven't said repeatedly that this argument is ruining their day and they want it to stop asap.