This is the inevitable thread for ILxors in their forties

i laughed when i found out i was the same age as my new colleague's parents.

I know what you mean but in the small towns I've been living in last few years (hefty population of transplants, so wanting to connect with new people), a lot of the clubs and meetups and art/music/etc events attract all ages. Simply because there is a limited number of people and events. Can't have a over 50 art club for Methodist Veterans or whatever but can have a general Art Club and oh hey I've never actually done art but am I retiree in a new town and it'd be fun to give art a try and I bet they're not too serious about it here and are eager for new members and hmm isn't that the 20 yr old tatted-up artsy barrista from the corner shop over there at an easel?

When I first started consciously feeling / realizing I was older than the people around me, I had the tendency to bring up age in conversation. But no one really cares. It’s really not a big deal unless you make it a big deal. Now when I overhear older people talking about how old they are to younger people - especially in an attempt to be funny- I just smh

otm

the tendency to bring up age in conversation

rn, in my mid-60s, I bring up my age only in the context of telling younger people that I am less energetic than I was ten years ago and cannot do the same amount of tasks in a day. I'm entering the period in life when my limits are more easily reached and my main goal is to keep that trajectory to a gentle glide rather than a steep descent. So far, so good.

nothing makes me feel older than being confronted with the appalling ignorance of the young (usually about history, or pre-smartphone existence or how the government works or who Orson Welles or Kraftwerk are)

i bring it up mostly in the context of trying to be supportive or assuage anxiety in younger friends ... like, it's okay that you're in this position now, you shouldn't feel like a failure at life, you've still got a lot of it left

in other words, "don't feel like a fuck up. I was a much bigger fuck up when I was yr age, and now I'm awesome" or so they think

i don't mind being my age, but i do get a little freaked out by stuff like 'oh, cool song, i remember when that came out 35 years ago. and 35 years before *that* they were playing polka on the radio'

My forties have been absolutely shit so far and this year doesn't look like it's going to be any better.

― Colonel Poo, Saturday, 30 December 2017 17:34 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well that certainly turned out to be the case

^^ same

recently i was chatting with a person i knew was my junior (but not by how much) about van halen and i was like "yeah i never really got into them" and he posited "i think you needed to grow up in the 80s to be able to enjoy them" and i felt compelled to -- and did lightheartedly -- tell this person that i did grow up in the 80s, i just thought van halen were dumb and gross. it was funny. he may have been surprised that i am older than he thought but it was not a huge thing. just a little lol at van halen's expense.

i always choose not to feel bad about being older than other people. as for young people not knowing stuff, i like being useful and i am a teacher so it's not an affront when students don't know who jimi hendrix is. i can teach them. that is my job. :)

oops that same was to sarahell
i was indeed a much bigger fuckup than most of the young people i encounter these days

also they don't even teach kids how sex works in school, it's no surprise they don't understand state legislatures

also stuff like the cost of housing where I live and the cost of higher education/student loan debt -- younger ppl have it harder than I did.

I just feel awkward about it, like uh oh am I doing the cranky old white male mansplaining thing by telling you about how important Kraftwerk were in the development of that shitty electronic dance music you like so much

also I am not a teacher tbf

xp

just be cool man
they can google kraftwerk, they don't need you

my only moment of that feeling was when i was at a show organized by some very young people and i said something about Can and they were like who's that and i wigged and excitedly told them about Can...and then maybe a day or two later I realized they may have been just fucking with me and they wanted to see the old lady wig out and i felt stupid. but whatever. so i feel stupid? i can't let that bother me. i didn't hurt anyone. i just wigged about Can. that's human.

what's Can

Can is a band
Google "can band"

see how cool i was that time

Suzi Quatro's side project.

they are a band who had a song called Can Can. google "can can can" if you want to know more

I think it's cooler when ppl excitedly explain to me the things I don't know about than when they ask me to look it up

fwiw

keep telling ppl about bands LL it's good

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d65oQPTYI4o

^these vids friggin blew my mind

yeah me too
i just had this terrible feeling that they did know and they were laughing at me while i was being happy and excited
that's just mean

I had this weird job once setting up 4merican 4pparel stores on the east coast and The Clash came on the soundsystem and a worker asked me who it was. I gave a quick summary (punk, London, 70s/early 80s), and she said "oh, like The Beatles." I just nodded.

aw, that's tender. i love teaching young people about music.
it's literally part of my job!! having students who are a blank slate and willing to listen >>>>> students who think they know everything and test you just to be assholes

I'm just gonna tell every kid I meet that I'm Damo Suzuki

the kids in that video actually knew more than I expected! interesting to hear all the off-the-wall ways they came in contact with some of these songs (Perks of Being a Wallflower soundtrack, Jonas Brothers cover, Just Dance).

the title -- DO TEENS KNOW 80s MUSIC? (REACT: Do They Know It?) -- almost seems like a deliberate Bojack parody (Hollywoo Stars and Celebrities: What Do They Know? Do They Know Things?? Let's Find Out!)

Not surprisingly, all the featured teens in the video are vivacious and good-looking. Therefore, a representative sample of "TEENS" who might "KNOW 80s MUSIC".

doing karaoke with young people (late 20s/early 30s) is a trip!

i'm told that the kids are into 'frasier' now; this is where they lost me

karaoke is where you really see generational differences re music nostalgia

Apparently "Friends" is a thing with the kids today. My partner teaches high school English, and her students bring it up often (with the occasional "were the '90s really like that?" question).

xp

Still think Frasier's boilerplate "overheard / misunderstood" plot is just Three's Company with better vocabulary and actors.

yeah, in grad school, we had to write a script for an episode of Frasier, and it was pretty much that

I refuse to countenance the idea that Kelsey of the Dark Secrets Grammar is a better comic actor than John Ritter

Haha, point taken. I'm thinking more of David Hyde Pierce's comic timing.

everyone always thinks i'm younger than i am which most people think is great but the flipside is that i get passed over for jobs that other, more wrinkly colleagues somehow just seem more suited for and the other thing is that i'm gonna die way before people are expecting

i look younger than i am too and it always stings when people comment on it because if looking young is what is good about me, i can expect that not to last long.
it's like getting an extension on an assignment; the assignment (looking older) is coming it's just not here quite yet. it'll be here eventually.

otherwise i don't mind.

All sorts of shit is big with my kids. The US version of the Office, Friends, Glee. Grey's Anatomy. Whatevs, if it makes them happy.

Couple of months until I turn 44. Feels fine so far. Got a nice mostly gray beard.

"was the 90s really like that?"

to my own consternation, I don't even understand the question

I fully support the youngins being into Frasier.

I will be 41 a month from today and I am excited about it! I’ve never felt better about myself or more comfortable in my own skin. Tbh I think I look better now than I did when I was 20. I like aging so far and I’m excited about the woman I’m becoming.

I dye my hair so I have no idea how much of it is grey but I def get a couple in my bangs that I pluck. No big deal.

To Tracer’s point - I made a point of telling people my age at my last job once I realized they thought I was a lot younger and were treating me differently as a result.

That REACT vid link gave me a few laughs, being right in the same age range as their parents, playing The Cure and trying to influence my nephew with my tastes. I liked how open they seemed to the music, not derisive, but genuinely appreciative and/or bemused.

Whatever age the protagonist of Hey Nineteen is, that’s the age I aspire to and am in my mind

Sometimes it bums me out to realize when Hey Nineteen was released Fagen/Becker were 32 and 30, respectively. I’m the same amount older than them as they were to the 19 yr old.

32 in the '70s is like 65 today so don't worry

"Hey 38" would be the new version

hey 38
that's Lily Allen