I HATE APPLE

ooh wait we've got a 39 year old on the stage and it's Jason Momoa

lol

Did I notice Louis Ck in the pic onscreen?

Siri, show me dystopic 'happiness'

https://photos.reportinglive.com/p/2019-03-25/f1553538462.jpg

Tim Cook says Apple has one more remarkable story to share.

"The Mueller report!"

Is that big bird presenting on stage? Damn

Apple credit card kind of feels like a big deal

I refuse to obtain any kind of credit card no matter the points or cash back involved, because I am not a sucker

that "look at all the famous people we got" slide is one of the most obnoxious things i have ever seen

that really was a dreadful keynote, huh

but is also a physical card made out of titanium

xp embarrassingly bad, by the look of it

these guys are going to make a septillion dollars from all this horseshit tho

greed eh

this is the shit that happens when companies get too big and have no idea how the fuck to expand so they pick random markets that seem to be popular

should take themselves private tbh

for real though, Disney needs to start making electronics so we can have a slugfest between them, Apple, Amazon, and AT&T

(That is not what I want and is a hell scenario)

btw the news+ thing appears to be the app Texture that they bought resurfacing as a tab in the news app

AppazonT&D. Calling it.

Only Apple could come up with something as innovative and gamechanging as “human-curated news”. Can’t believe no one ever thought of that before tbh.

otm, until now all my news had been curated by hula hoops

got the chipmunks christmas song in my head now

still am embarrassing keynote though.

Everyone needs to just stop buying all shit in general.

Easy for you to say but what am I supposed to put in my house if I stop buying shit

You can fill your house with deafening emptiness.

xpost You buy a bunch of metal bowls. You can eat out of them, cook over a fire with them, make the fire in them, turn them upside down to sit on, watch water swirl in them...

so is the headphone jack coming back, yes or no

You can fill your house with deafening emptiness.

― nathom, Tuesday, March 26, 2019 8:23 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Sounds familiar!

https://i.imgur.com/ohMI8vG.jpg

(but he's playing records!)

I bet they're just out for show.

Is that 'Aja' in front of him?

it is not

xpost You buy a bunch of metal bowls. You can eat out of them, cook over a fire with them, make the fire in them, turn them upside down to sit on, watch water swirl in them...

― Yerac, Tuesday, March 26, 2019 1:26 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

What is wrong with me that 4/5ths of this seem like perfectly reasonable advice? Like I have multiple times told my boyfriend, "You should just use that one metal bowl for everything."

Yerac is only ever reasonable

otm

trying to figure out which 1/5 you weren't down with

I am guessing the water swirling. Replace with- fill bowl with water and put in sm/med houseplants when you are away for weeks/a month. The houseplants rewater themselves through the holes in the bottom of the plant pot.

water swirling... that's entertainment sorted though. Not sure with all this activity there will be much time for sitting around. I feel sitting is out.

I dunno, I have sat on many upside down metal bowls.

you would

My boot camp partition’s WiFi download speeds are 33% faster than in Mac OS. Wtf?

you've got it sat on a metal bowl, don't you?

s3 apple watch battery life has been disgusting since last update

disgusting bad? as opposed to like, a disgusting dunk?

used to be at 75% by the end of the day, now it's closer to 45%

at one (1) year old, my current phone started lasting 2 hours outside

s3 apple watch battery life has been disgusting since last update

― seedy ron (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, April 4, 2019 7:00 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

maybe i'm thinking of someone else, but i feel like you post this about every piece of apple hardware you own after every OS update.

is there a better time to post about them

ya got a bum watch

you’re holding it wrong

Are you trying to sync unchecked songs to your watch