GOTTA GO FAST: come uhh' anticipate' the SONIC THE HEDGEHOG movie with me i guess

i'm not gonna lie, i'd prefer that to what it looks like we're getting

You’d have to recast eggman in that case

...right?

why, is jim carrey allergic to rubber?

Yes that’s why it was so cruel that the uk press constantly referred to him as “rubber-faced funnyman jim carrey”

the cruellest of ironies when u think abt it

this would be 90 minutes of pregnant sonic having his toes sucked by tails, while in the background a fetishwear-clad dr robotnik bursts balloons with his spike heels

they haven't released the red band trailer for the movie yet, so I still have hope

*unzips*

Message Bookmarked

Seriously though, if the director wasn't a clearly desperate man who will entertain any advice which might serve to quell the endless flop sweat and nervous diarrhea, I'd be concerned with the precedent this sets re: suggesting to fans that petty bitching might actually be an efficacious superpower.

this movie's reported budget is a trim $90m

i wonder how much extra it'll cost to fix ('fix') sonic's design

What if

Now hang with me here for a sec

These folks who created the Sonic we saw in the trailer and thought 'yes, perfect, that looks ready for public consumption'? Presumably the same folks now tasked with 'fixing' Sonic in a fever pitch based on the thoughts and opinions of random Twitter users?

What if they somehow make Sonic even worse.

What if that.

What if.

We can only hope so

i wonder how much extra it'll cost to fix ('fix') sonic's design

not just re-rendering it for the movie bug also presumably changing a ton of planned marketing materials for all regions....can't be cheap, I'd guess it tacks on another 10-15mil maybe

*but

What if this is the film that destroys Paramount?

So many tantalizing what ifs.

Seriously pity the CG people working on this thing.

the Mouth Squad has to be pretty demoralized right now

speaking of the mouth squad, here's an exclusive peek at the redesigned movie sonic

https://www.geek.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/sonic-toilet.jpg

https://c8.alamy.com/comp/PM8TDB/studio-publicity-still-from-heavens-gate-christopher-walken-1980-united-artists-all-rights-reserved-file-reference-31715204tha-for-editorial-use-only-PM8TDB.jpg

I'm just endlessly fascinated by these instances wherein someone pays a lot of money for the rights to adapt a well-known intellectual property with an established fanbase where there's a pretty clear path for making something that at least a portion of that fanbase and general audiences will enjoy but they instead decide to just say 'nah' and do their own barely-related thing that nobody asked for and few people will enjoy. Over and over and over this happens.

Why is everyone assuming they are just going to redo the CGI on the Sonic design? I assume they will go and redo all the ugly CGI characters in the entire film. Like that unfunny character that looks a little like Jim Carrey? Totally unconvincing CGI, do it again.

Did one of the execs have a weird kid who's mutually obsessed with Sonic and James Marsden and decide based on that evidence that that was a pairing the world was clamoring for?

Seriously, that Carrey routine in the trailer was a carbon copy of the shit he did in his prime 20+ years ago when I was a dumb teenager with no taste who still was all like 'ugh, this shit again' every time he got started on his 'ALLLLLLRIGHTYTHEN!' trip. You're inching up on 'Jerry Lewis in Hardly Working' territory here, Jim.

RIYL Kangaroo Jack

I guess it's kind of admirable that studios are willing to make movies for people with traumatic brain injuries. They certainly deserve entertainment, too.

I'm with OL

Jim Carrey doing the looking-aside, fast-talking monologue in that tone of voice followed by a pause and some ridiculous catchphrase or non-sequitur was this shtick he trotted out too many times, but apparently the director's entire concept here is "play this genius Doctor like he's Ace Ventura, evil scientist"

Thankfully he's displayed a broader and more appealing range over time, but I was frankly over his 'Carrey cranked to eleven!!!' shtick by halfway through the first season of In Living Color (by which point I was only barely of a double-digit age) and will never understand why the rest of the world kept hungrily scarfing it down and asking for seconds.

it was a very different time

then 9/11 happened and of course everything changed

ace ventura is funny you are all cancelled, also the new sonic is good now

idk I prefer all this to the horrorshow that is woke carrey tweeting his dumb pictures at the president, as though writer and activist russell brand weren’t already crucified for our sins

I begrudgingly went with friends to see Ace Ventura 2, which is still the only time I've ever fallen asleep in a movie theater. Although I woke up for the part where he erupted from the rhino's anus and I'll admit that that was p funny.

(Although tbf emerging from a rhino's anus has been a reliable gag since time immemorial.)

exiting the vampire's castle 2: when hyoerstition calls

funnier w/o the typo i admit

Ace Ventura is funny but also viciously transphobic and racist so I have to get my “guy makes his bum talk” fix elsewhere sadly

https://www.geek.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/buff-sonic.jpg

and you get that fix now from donald trump press conferences amirite xp #resist #itsmuellertime #orangemanbad

I get it from my upcoming novel about le petomane

I still don't see how Danny DeVito didn't get the Dr. Robotnik role

Probably had something to do with the state of intense inebriation which led to him stumbling into the audition in the first place against the slurred advice of his drinking buddies as they implored him to think about his career.

Now I want to see a Sonic movie with a constantly-drunk DeVito. Preferably starring in all of the major roles.

i like jim carrey and thinks he's funny.

alrighty then

I'm sure he's a total douche irl - see anti-vax stuff and his "i do not exist" schtick

It's all subjective but I find that I only really tend to like comedians who act like they've never witnessed actual human behavior when there isn't a patina of self-satisfaction slathered across every exaggerated expression and odd turn of phrase.

I sort of liked zany 90s Jim Carrey, and genuinely liked him when he did The Truman Show and Eternal Sunshine, and this is a lot worse than a step backwards from that. Also it doesn't help that he has the worst script of all time to work with and is compensating for the lack of jokes with extra gurning.
His drawings are horrible, it was good that they annoyed Mussolini's granddaughter, but that's about it.

Jim's "Dark Crimes" era didn't pay off well

https://www.slantmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/darkcrimes-2.jpg

That film is so bad

this was the nadir

https://i.guim.co.uk/img/static/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2013/8/11/1376223731535/Jim-Carrey-in-The-Number--010.jpg?width=620&quality=85&auto=format&fit=max&s=3a0241aa940b6ab61ea22b16d273511b

First look at revamped Sonic is promising

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VkrHEYKSirg/hqdefault.jpg

this was the nadir

🖼