Q – The 50 Worst Albums Ever!

Ace of Bass woulda been a good Miami hip hop act

I liked some of the Kevin Rowland album actually.

this is basically the "shit you saw in the CD Warehouse clearance bin" list then

Emma Bunton's bossa album was quite nice, you fuckers.

Shania? Fuck off man

Lads, lads, it's Q

enjoying how they couldn't be bothered to spell several groups' names right

Lauryn Hill's Unplugged is a stunner. And Midnite Vultures is still my favorite Beck album.

Not sure i like this new betting advert with noodle vague

Q can fuck off

d'you know i assumed it had

I'd rather listen to quite a few of these than loads of the "greatest albums".

What the hell are Saturnz Return & Midnight Vultures doing on here

POLL: The 50 Worst Issues of Q Ever!

did midnite vultures get really bad reviews? Or just in Q?

Q thought it was shit on the grounds that it wasn't Odelay, IIRC.

All Their Solo Albums!

wow so edgy...

The 50 Lowest Hanging Fruit Ever!

Neil's Everybody’s Rocking is a good choice, although it does have "Wonderin'"--Landing on Water would have been even better.

Where's Pat Boone's In a Metal Mood

The advantage of coming to Neil in the 90s: I skipped all those crap 80s records.

Good timing--but you don't want to miss the first couple (or first three; would be quite content without the third one myself) or the last one.

24. The Beatles - The White Album

Hmmm, can't say I agree with this choice!

xp

Right! Didn't mean to lump Freedom in with the bad ones; always think of it as the beginning of his '90s comeback, even if its a few months off from being technically true. The bits of Trans ("Transformer Man," "Sample and Hold") are interesting. I'll give Hawks & Doves and Re·ac·tor a spin one of these days.

I grabbed Lucky Thirteen out of a cut-out bin a number of years back and, the Trans selections aside, it basically confirmed everything I've heard about Neil in the 80s.

I like LOW more than his other eighties albums, obv choices aside.

Not a great record, though.

My intro to Neil Young was "This Note's For You," so when I found out he had a long respected history of music behind him and, eventually, a long respected future, I couldn't figure it out.

The only ones I've heard in full are Lou Reed, Destiny's Child, Beck, and Shania Twain, none of which I thought were bad, and the first and third of which I really like. I will say that I like "No One Needs to Know" a lot more than anything on Come On Over.

Come On Over was a nuisance at the time, but I might feel charitable enough now to give it a fresh listen. I still don’t like the two big singles, though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRgrJgCBY6k

This is great

I found "Neither Fish nor Flesh" in a charity shop so I got it.

It's a fine album. I had a cassette edition back in the day (probably still do) and it seemed a bit hit/miss, but now it all seemed fine.

I bet no one writing this piece had ever actually heard the Naomi Campbell album.

Every time I read this list it makes me more angry, who was responsible for this?

"Terence Trent Diabolical" aaaaagh go fucking die you tedious pricks

It's lazy crap. Neither Fish Nor Flesh underperformed but got terrific reviews, dunno who's recycling early 90s tedium on the editorials taff.

dunno who's recycling early 90s tedium on the editorials taff.

This list is bad in exactly the same way that the razzies are bad

What did Q have against Fischerspooner? Or is Fishspooner some kind of Mark Radcliffe-type spoof band or something

That list is tldr;

MIdnight Vultures is bad but it's hardly the worst album ever. same with Dylan and the Dead (it's just boring), Wilburys, Fishcerspooner, Goldie...a few others. Tin machine 2 is a great album (at least the songs Bowie sings). First glance I want to give this to the Sgt Pepper soundtrack but that has a slamming version of Come together by Aerosmith on it. Most of this shit I have never listened to (like Primative Cool).Of the albums I've actually heard I'd have to give it to the Duran Duran cover album.

I'll give Hawks & Doves and Re·ac·tor a spin one of these days.

Got mashed potato...

The Sign actually has a couple good dance cuts on it: Dancer in a Daydream and In My Mind (Mindless Mix).

I do consider this the most destructive record. In My Mind contains a loud, reverse kick drum that will blow out your speakers. I blew out one of my mom's speakers bumping this CD over 25 years ago, and I blew out my subwoofer more recently on the MP3.

I can't think of any other record that will mess up your system quite like this one.

Wtf Neil Young collaborated with Shocking Pinks? Random.

Interesting that Fischerspooner is on here. People really hate that record? I didn't get the appeal when it came out. It was marketed as part of the Electroclash, early 80s throwback scene but it always sounded early 90s to me, like a Thrill Kill Kult record. That record does kind of suck, but I'm surprised it was considered one of the worst ever.

critics may have felt that way, I don't think listeners did. I saw fischerspooner twice and it was fucking packed.

I bet no one writing this piece had ever actually heard the Naomi Campbell album.

tbf I'm not sure Naomi Campbell even heard the album. Wasn't it notorious for only selling about 100 copes in its first week?

This is a ridiculously lazy list. Also, Metal Machine Music is the only good Lou Reed album.

Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie was a hit album that got positive reviews and a few Grammy nominations, so by those metrics alone I am skeptical that it is one of the 50 worst ever.

It’s was an ambitious-in-the-sense-of-imposing album (17 songs in 72 mins) and it was the follow-up to an album that was inescapable for several years (was it her New Jersey?), and thus a convenient target.

*jerkoff motion*

Metal Machine Music, which may or may not be the best Lou Reed album as I don't care enough to hear the rest of his output.

i mean yeah on the one hand obviously grrrrrrrr Q magazine

but on the other hand

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZQWyImkkU0

fucking hell

i can only imagine the reasoning offered for deeming a phil collins covers album by then-contemporary r&b artists the third worst lp in the history of recorded sound. i haven't heard the whole record, but if deborah cox's version of "something happened on the way to heaven" and brandy + ray j's version of "another day in paradise" off of it are anything to go by, it's probably a collection of well-performed but perfunctorily arranged renditions by an overall talented group of artists whose admiration of collins's work is entirely natural and unremarkable. it wasn't even that well-known or successful a release so it's truly bizarre to see it singled out as especially worthy of derision or mockery, as if it were recorded in poor taste or inherently ridiculous.

(cox's version of "something happened..." from that record also got remixed into a trancey house version that is something of a classic in my book)

Metal Machine Music, which may or may not be the best Lou Reed album as I don't care enough to hear the rest of his output.

We're supposed to vote for worst, though! MMM is great!

xp to dyl

safe to assume that the majority of Q's '50 Worst Albums Ever' is gonna be better (or at the very least more interesting) than Q's '50 Best Albums Ever', really not worth getting worked up over. these people never had even a passing acquaintance with interesting music of the day, let alone 'the history of recorded sound' (which only began in 1963 for these bozos)

with that said, get that 2004 s/t album by The Others up on youtube and give it a spin, seriously. even a stopped clock etc. etc.

I have never heard of The Others before

my sincerest apologies for bringing the curse down upon you

well, luckily I still haven't heard them.

coward

they look libertines-ish do they sound like them?

I listened to about 2 minutes of that song above and it's not bad, it's just...generic. The "indie" bands people liked from that era sound exactly like that to me.

xp hang on though

you initiated this poll

do you mean to say that

The worst album I can think of by a significant artist is Liz Phair’s Funstyle... it’s the worst album I ever paid for, and probably worse than most or all of this list.

yeah, good pick.

why is there no Dream Theater on this list? That shit is terrible.

or like, one of the 500 Asia albums that don't feature Geoff Downes or John Wetton

i've heard the second scott stapp solo record, that's probably one of the worst albums, top 50 idk

albeit unless these listmakers were psychics that record would fall outside the purview of this list

I actually dont really mind Everybody's Rockin as generic 50s pastiche, the fact that its by the talented guitarist and songwriter Neil Young is obviously a mark against it, but its not any more unlistenable than like some random-ass Eddie Cochrane comp or something.

Midnite Vultures is the only truly WTF entry on that list imo but not surprised t of ind it there I guess, its truly hilarious to remember how much hate it got at the time from the whitebread rock press.

Q gave it 4 out of 5.

No shit? Thats really funny - I wonder if there are other albums on that list that Q rated highly.

I know MV got a lot of praise too and a grammy nom & stuff but I feel like I definitely read a bunch of reviews from rock dudes that basically boiled down to "why is this white rock guy doing prince stuff, wtf"

(picks one at random) ... they also gave Babylon Zoo 4 out of 5.

Midnite Vultures is a terrible album, Q otm

It was so bad when it came
Out it started one of the first arguments I ever had with a friend of mine, who maintained everything beck touched was genius.

oh dear I listened to The Others, cheers lads

only a bunch of boring cloth-eared cunts that have repped heavy for shit like Travis and Coldplay would consider MMM in a worst ever list.

We're supposed to vote for worst, though! MMM is great!

Damn, I'm a dunce.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iT9yf-Qa_1M&t

this is one of the best moments of Rowland's career (and the rest of the album ain't bad either)

second time lucky

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iT9yf-Qa_1M

far be it from me to guess why the Jeremy Clarkson of music magazines might dislike that album and most of the rest of these

Whatever, I fucking love Midnight Vultures.

28. The Rolling Stones – Dirty Work

yeah but they're wearing lame suits on the cover

Albums on this list that I like:

1. Duran Duran – Thank You

10. Tim Machine – Tin Machine Ii

36. Kula Shaker – Peanuts, Pigs & Astronauts

41. Paul Simon – Songs From The Capeman OST

I can also enjoy listening to Neil Young's rockin' album; Oasis' SOTSOG is certainly their worst but it's got a couple of excellent songs on it.

the Jeremy Clarkson of music magazines

lol

Dirty Work is a good, often great Stones album despite the cover.

TM II is on this list because the editors thought, "lol Tin Machine and lime green suits."

I remember tin machine ii getting terrible reviews

10. Tim Machine – Tin Machine Ii

Not sure about that album by mr Machine, first name Tim, but as far as Tin Machine II goes, that one I think is really quite good. It's got Shopping For Girls, Amlapura & much more, I personally prefer it over the first Tin Machine album.

36. Kula Shaker – Peanuts, Pigs & Astronauts

The band gets a lot of hate in general, I can't see why. Their first four albums are all great - Peasants, Pigs & Astronauts being one of those (or did they make a 'Peanuts' remix album...)

― Valentijn, Monday, August 12, 2019 1:53 AM (four days ago)

Who knew positivity could be so hilarious! This inspired me to check out each of these records. As for this entry:

34. Fishspooner - #1

While I've yet to really swim the ocean of this entire album, "Emerge" by Fischerspooner is pretty awesome. This mityped band name reminded me of a dinner party I had amidst the Electroclash era, where the passing around of a plate of salmon and a large serving utensil led a guest to ask my friend "Will you be the fish-er spooner?", which he replied, "Only if you pour the Larry tea."

Ayyyy-O!

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

All “Worst album ever” lists are terrible.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

SHOULDER

― husserl gang (rip van wanko), Saturday, August 10, 2019 10:37 AM

otm

"Will you be the fish-er spooner?", which he replied, "Only if you pour the Larry tea."

i don’t get it

I don't know how I missed this altogether. Putting Midnite Vultures, Saturnzreturn (and I get swatted for it every time I say it but I'll still say again that I think I prefer it to Timeless) and Metal Machine Music on a 'worst albums of all-time' list is a fairly succinct way of stating that you're an unserious publication, I guess, if that's what you're going for, Q.

Hawks & Doves is great, side 1 is actually 70s stuff intended for the scuttled Homegrown album, includes Captain Kennedy