RIP Boris Johnson

I hear he's in a ditch now

drowned iirc

*cough*

*gasps*

cough the fuck away from me

Keeping the thread warm, good maintenance

One thing the US libs and the UK hard left can agree on

shakey u hero

RIP, may heaven grant you hair that doesn't look like a shit

Boris Johnson, great-grandson of Ali Kemal Bey, is now "the sick man of Europe."

— Gary Alexander (@grylxndr) April 6, 2020

boom

That's worth a LOL tbh.

salute to Comrade COVID

Goodbye England's rose ... y gammon ass.

Is there a protocol for what to do with this thread if he does drop off the perch?

You dowse it with your favorite sparkling wine.

COVIDEO Killed the Brexito Star (but not really unless it's a covincidence)

oops https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-52192604

just in time to be resurrected on Easter

Nooooooo, when shakes does these threads they don't come true ffs

they always come true, eventually

well, not the part where I wish them a peaceful rest, that's just a joke

It's very weird to wish ill health on someone, however, it's hard to think of him as an actual person and not a blight on society.

nothing weird about wishing bad on ppl at all imo

i'm always very impressed at how hard and uncompromising shakey is. he crosses lines others wouldn't dare to cross, so amazing.

vital content, truly

If the "worst" should come to pass maybe they'll keep him like this till the vaccine comes through

https://i0.wp.com/www.pinkink.media/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/hitlers-brain-4.jpg

treesh

trís a mhic

not only is this a beloved shakey thing

but this is boris johnson

this is not the hill

Where's that Keegan jpeg?

I think we're reaching peak corona threads now this one's edged into the mix

#pray4boris

https://youtu.be/z0jw5qBgUuo

Albini otm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOti1xX8fdI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_3oFRcTNHo

Like every other person in the world who gets infected, whether BoJo lives or dies will depend entirely on his own body's ability to overcome the virus, since the only thing the ICU can do for him is force oxygen into his lungs via a ventilator. The rest is up to his immune system and major organs.

of state

Hoping his major organs make the right choice

Did they toss someone else out of bed to replace them with him y/n

thats the question

was this ward at capacity

is he of a similar profile of illness to take up a scarce bed as anyone else

etc

St Thomas & Guy’s has a private ward.

private ward, major organs

general hilarity

I feel very conflicted on this. I had money on Bolsonaro to be the first to go.

I think Bolsonaro is in considerably better physical shape than Boris... at the best of times.

+1 for herd immunity

Awesome:

well im going to keep this brief. i overexerted myself while responding to emails and got put up in the hospital. i basically need lungs now

— wint (@dril) September 9, 2013

this is not a dril?

the biggest tragedy here is the death parties will need to be held remotely or postponed

for obvious reasons, if the unthinkable happens, I have dibs on "BoJohnsonDeadverdrive"

this is a horrible thread

yes now more than ever what we must do is spend four figures on some fucking cufflinks

Starting a rival one to see if we can raise six grand for Dignitas.

irl lol

same

He dead yet?

Apparently he was engaging positively with his scrotum yesterday whilst gargling blood and shitting his kecks

Either he's much worse than is being claimed OR he thinks that Dominic Raab is too stupid and unreliable to be running the country properly in his absence and therefore the less he knows the better.

He is now out of ICU and will almost certainly live to tell the tale.

"get up yer bastard, there's nowt wrong with thee!"

RIP

UPDATE: British PM Johnson has been moved out of ICU.

"The Prime Minister has been moved this evening from intensive care back to the ward, where he will receive close monitoring during the early phase of his recovery,” Downing Street says.

— NBC News (@NBCNews) April 9, 2020

You win some, you lose some.

can’t believe they misspelled ‘morgue’ as ‘ward’ ffs

There's still tomorrow, you never know.

great revive

ffs

I suspect the enforced mourning will be prolonged indefinitely regardless

These threads never work I blame shakey

nothing good comes from putting the death cart before the horse. When will you ppl learn!

shakey is a psy op

Was he actually ill or was it aristocratic japes and tomfoolery?

i don’t believe shakey was ill, no

Ey I cannae believe that they put him in some brandy barrels. He must really be worse Dan I say . https://t.co/fOwMQOdVL2

— RobertoPesto (@PestoRoberto) April 9, 2020

Johnson never had the rona
merely 5g morgellons

hoping for a reverse Jesus this weekend

Was he actually ill or was it aristocratic japes and tomfoolery?

I don't believe it's the case at all, but it would really be something if he ducked out of the spotlight for a week or so to avoid scrutiny, ended up being taken to hospital and having to play along, then had to spend several days surrounded by poor bastards dying on ventilators while inevitably picking up the virus for real himself.

I mean he looked pretty fucking ill before they hauled him in, not that he doesn't usually mind. Still time for a relapse by the way folks #fatchance

‘It Was, For, Uh, Medical Reasons,’ Says Doctor To Boris Johnson, Explaining Why They Had To Give Him Haircut https://t.co/WzKHHwqENf pic.twitter.com/DIj9lAkN6q

— The Onion (@TheOnion) April 9, 2020

The fat fuck is not only not dead he is out and posting video messages.

At least his forthcoming child will get to know his father, unusually

I've got to say for a guy who was supposedly at death's door a few days ago he's bearing up well.

who thinks he wasn't ill enough to be hospitalized and this was some sort of scheme from cummings?

i really wanna think that but shurely there's no way?

I absolutely subscribe to that theory. I mean it isn't exactly Icke territory, he's a born liar and has a history of hiding when the going gets tough.

doesn't take a lot of subterfuge, just need him to say he's feeling worse, the hospital isn't going to refuse to admit the prime minister.

i think they could tell if he was breathing properly or not

I could imagine him bullshitting that it would be good theatre to show the seriousness of the situation blah blah and give him the opp to evade scrutiny.

Death would've been the ultimate evasion of scrutiny.

I think there are plenty of people who have some minor breathing difficulties and aren't admitted to hospital right now. the grim tone of the way they announced it was the main sleight of hand here.

Surely there's a lower bar for hospitalization when it's the PM, deserved or not.

this is all shakey’s fault

otm, turns out all he needed was to rest peacefully for a stretch

he's probably dead, video was recorded years ago along with thousands of others in the event that he somehow became PM and came down with something called covid-19

there's other videos where he survives being murdered by the ghost of blackbeard, falling into a pit of spikes and losing all his coins, etc

he's actually been replaced by Paul McCartney in a mask

I blame myself for not pushing him into traffic when he cycled past me c.2009

I am a Boris truther AMA

He was nearly admitted several times before he was actually admitted, but the ICU admittance was down to extra caution because of his position. I know this for absolute fact, but can’t say how.

RIP Boris Johnson

mike t-gove morelike xp

i knew it!