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"Sadly since cell phones and laptops usually update themselves, my fantasy of millions of Floridians being on the wrong time won't come to pass."

It sounds like the setup for a 1990s fish-out-of-water comedy. It would end with the hero teaching the futuristic people of New York about "real music", e.g. pre-Beatles rock and roll, because the film would be written by a baby boomer who hasn't got over Elvis being drafted. He or she would catch some crooks using a vintage skateboard, or something, or a surfboard, because people in Florida surf, don't they? He or she would dress up like the characters from Miami Vice. It's high concept. Nineteen-eighties meets the modern age! Cocaine everywhere, and people are paranoid about AIDS. There could be a cameo from the COUGH Indian COUGH chap from Short Circuit that would seem perfectly normal to the film's writer, because Indian people are funny, but would be horribly uncomfortable for the audience.

Alternatively imagine a film in which Florida is perpetually an hour behind the rest of the United States. The transient nature of internet microcelebrity is such that just being an hour behind the times would cut the people of Florida off from "the narrative". They would have to send meme-gatherers into the rest of the United States in order to bring back fresh live memes. I live in the UK, which means that I'm fourteen hours behind "the narrative". My experience of Reddit and so forth is that everything happened fourteen hours ago, while I was asleep, and by the time I catch up the drama is over.

I'm thinking of that woman who was on a flight to South Africa. She tweeted something tasteless before she got on the plane - "I'm not worried about catching AIDS because I'm white" or something like that - and while she was on the plane a twitter storm erupted, and she was sacked (she worked in PR), and she only learned about it when she touched down because back in 2011 or whenever there was no internet on planes. That little drama played itself out over the course of just a few hours. Imagine a future in which being just one hour behind the times was enough to cut yourself adrift from modern society, if that isn't already the case. That's why I read Ilxor every day, so that I don't lose touch. Once you let go of the rope the current takes you and you're lost.

Ashley Pomeroy, Sunday, 3 November 2019 14:22 (two months ago) link


Ferlinghetti Hvorostovsky (James Redd and the Blecchs), Sunday, 3 November 2019 14:41 (two months ago) link

I can't remember the year or the town it happened in, so I know this sounds like an urban legend, but there was a town in Florida during the 70s that suffered a power outage for one hour during the night the state sprang forward from EST to EDT.

Since it was before clocks that could set themselves, most people set their clocks ahead before bed. Then their clocks froze for an hour, allowing standard time to catch back up. When everyone awoke in the morning, there were no flashing 12:00s. Just a bunch of people who still wound up being an hour late for church.

pplains, Sunday, 3 November 2019 16:18 (two months ago) link

...And dinner time is anticipated an hour early by some fraught felines.

Ferlinghetti Hvorostovsky (James Redd and the Blecchs), Sunday, 3 November 2019 22:37 (two months ago) link

Baxter just went “fuck everything” and started asking for dinner at 11am

Alternatively imagine a film in which Florida is perpetually an hour behind the rest of the United States.

I enjoyed the premises that flow from this but I refuse to accept the implication that the other rest of the US sets their clocks back three hours. The sun setting at 5pm is brutal enough, under your system it’d be dark at lunchtime come January.

now let's play big lunch take little lunch (sic), Monday, 4 November 2019 00:42 (two months ago) link

I am working overnight tonight and have to work an extra hour thanks to this nonsense

― k3vin k., Saturday, November 2, 2019 9:09 PM (yesterday)

that's happened to me too!

Dan S, Monday, 4 November 2019 00:56 (two months ago) link

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