Worst Films of 2019

i expected to hate biggest little farm and i ended up liking it.. i thought it illustrated some complex ideas about ecosystems pretty well and the movie as a whole felt more lived-in than the super-wholesome vibe put off by the trailer. of course any movie about food production that doesn't talk about the money backing it and doesn't admit that capitalism is a big part of the problem is lying somewhere.

IT pt 2 was a real piece of shit and like 3 hours of it

I liked the first hour of IT 2, then was just bored. most of my friends, who I expected to hate it, since they were hardcore book fans, ate it up and got defensive about all criticism of it. such a weird reaction to such a forgettable movie.

the gayxploitation opening was so fucking stupid and badly handled and the worst part of the movie though.

it sounds like it was an awful opening BUT I do support Xavier Dolan dying.....torn

dying ONSCREEN I should specify

haha. a friend of mine told me he sat next to someone who cheered on the hate crime scene. any movie that's going to serve that up for knuckle-draggers is garbage imo.

oh jesus

Seven Psychopaths one of them?

No I meant the "magicians do magic heists" movies, you'd think it was impossible to be sub-Nolan but apparently not

Xpost i felt sick at that scene but found out it apparently came from the book.

Glad nobody did that at my showing.

Velvet Buzzsaw
Pet Sematary
Rocketman
Judy

I was apparently in the vast minority who thought It: Chapter 2 was better than the (pretty awful) first part.

what was so bad about judy ;_;

I'm biased against the genre.

haha yeah i don't like the biopic genre either but i thought it was weird / interesting / deeply depressing and r.z. doing her best wounded animal throughout was something else.

There were points I was caught up somewhere in between rolling my eyes and wiping mist away from them, which means it at least flirted with camp a few times.

xp back to whiney: i thought the filmmaking and the script for Art of Self Defense were so immediately, egregiously bad that I turned it off shortly after he went to the dojo.
i'm gonna take a crazy leap here and suggest the people who beat him up were from the dojo, no?

I really like Rocketman. Loads of fun.

richard jewell

obv

my friend had a screener and it’s like barely a movie

so smarmy and self-regarding that it had the unintended effect of making me believe jewell did it

"did you do it?"
"No"
"Did you do it?"
"No"
"Did you do it?"
"No"
"We think you did."
"Oh."

HER SMELL is easily my favorite movie of the year, probably top 5 of the decade

i lasted about twenty minutes and then the person i was with simultaneously leaned in at the same time i did and we both said "wanna go?" more or less at once

Has everyone read the Wiki synopsis for Last Christmas already

Scenario I cannot ever imagine myself in, regardless of whatever came next:

Slides actual cash money toward a cashier. "One adult for Her Smell, please."

Who stands in line anymore

I'm waiting for Smell Her, personally.

Sir...

Thanks for the heads up on Last Christmas, Simon. I don't know how it took the Hallmark Channel so long to get one of their movies into an actual theater, but good on em.

I'm waiting for Smell Her

A sequel to Talk to Her?

Or Ben Hur.

Ben Hur break her any way you want her

yahoo headline:

Clint Eastwood's record-breaking movie flop

Unlike the breakout success of "Joker," the debate surrounding "Richard Jewell" did little to inspire interest among moviegoers.

it is truly some deeply astonishing shit to see one succeed while the other failed.

What’s the deal with Richard Jewell, is that a Batman thing too?

Richard Jewell is a renowned jewelry thief looking for one last score. Unfortunately, the job goes bad and he is pursued by veteran cop Olin Picks, who is three days from retirement.

That's when The Man With No Name shows up

Richard Jewell was so inspired by vajazzling that he created a similar line of genital adornments for men. Guess what the company was called. Just guess.

The Mule quietly made over $100 million in America last week, so I won't count this fucker out yet.

er last year

The new Michael Bay thing, 6 Underground, definitely belongs on this list. I'm not anti-Bay (I own Pain & Gain and respect the Criterion people for picking up on The Rock and Armageddon) but this thing is fucking garbage.

Richard Jewell crucially lacking Baby Yoda

I watched The Fanatic and it's not a "fun" bad movie. Deeply misanthropic.

seriously though, it's not too hard to figure out why a historical drama focused on a little remembered 90's catastrophe starring an unknown guy and titled "guy whose name you don't know" didn't clean up at the box office; the "it's the media stupid" subtext and imaginary honeypot journalist scandal probably muscled out the small sliver of the audience who would otherwise be curious enough to try it

I liked Aniara a lot, btw. Still plan on getting around to Hagazussa.