ilx posts with striking imagery

xps

I've been working deliveries part-time during lockdown (in lieu of being able to do my actual job) and occasionally I have to go to this farmhouse that belongs to this old lady and her dog, which is some sort of 'Poo' variant, and it creeps around the hedges then springs out and has this truly terrible bark, I've never heard anything like it, a sort of torn, screeching, penetrating knife in the head in all the wrong frequencies, it's like some Aphex Twin video dog, I have to plug my ears when I deliver there now.

― Maresn3st, Wednesday, 10 March 2021 10:29 (four hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

voting that dog in next year's metal poll

"torn" is a particularly nice touch

When Word is all chummily colloquial like "your margins are pretty small there buddy" I just want to give it a fierce backhand and scream HOW DARE YOU BE SO FAMILIAR like a stern Victorian patriarch

― hiroyoshi tins in (Sgt. Biscuits), Wednesday, 10 March 2021 15:52 (twelve minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

I've lived scenes like Diane's at that party: being alert to humiliations from people once in your life, being seated beside weary sour old ladies while a beat box pitter-patters in the background.

― So who you gonna call? The martini police (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Saturday, April 17, 2021 4:21 PM (two days ago) bookmarkflaglink

One of my favorites was out in the woods (the Big South Fork National Park), where we had this camp set up in a big overhang about 2/3 of the way up the side of the mountain, and we were playing this game where we would throw a glowstick* as far out into the dark-as-fuck night sky and watch it plink-plonk down through the tree branches until it landed WAY down at the bottom of the mountain. Then we all took off running down the mountain after it, which was hella exhilarating and fun. And whoever got to the glowstick first got to be the next to throw it. After a good solid while playing this game, I finally got to it first, brought it back up the mountain to the campsite, pulled back, chucked the fucker into the air...and it got stuck in a tree.

Every once in awhile, sitting around the fire later that night, someone would look into the sky and see it and mention it and we'd have this big reminiscing session like it was a fond "back-in-the-day" memory, and it became inexplicably funnier each time. Yowzah!

(*glowsticks have proven themselves indespensible tr1p-toys)

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Saturday, June 14, 2003 2:52 PM

Oh, I should mention that's from your acid stories . I sure do miss nickalicious.

2003, when you had to provide a footnote to explain that glowsticks are cool when you’re on acid?

The oppressive blandness of that property would make being there at, say, dusk on a gloomy winter day feel unbearably suffocating. Imagine! It has all the sensibilities of a corporate office property (including the uninviting purgatory of a lawn that nobody will venture onto except to periodically mow; a stagnant arbitrarily framed backdrop for one to watch snow slowly accumulate and then melt over endless monotonous days and for nothing else) that was furnished in 2002 mixed with a dentist office waiting room in an middle class suburb (likely even complete with the echoes of never-ending HGTV episodes that follow such a strict template you would swear that a computer is merely randomizing the humanoids each time in an otherwise repeated artificial simulation). That's the general vibe I get from it.

― Evan, Wednesday, April 28, 2021 6:29 PM (nine minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

xps that glowstick game sounds hella fun

Ha, remember when I re-posted that?

a friend has a story about being stuck in a car on a narrow country road during the foot & mouth outbreak in Jan 2001 while a forklift moved a pile of dead cows onto a huge bonfire in front of them, and the only CD they had to listen to was the Hanson Christmas album, that probably left a mental imprint

― fc_TEFH28mo (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, September 2, 2021 11:41 AM (eleven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

wow

Holy fuck

mmmmmooo bop

what a tale

p sure that scene was in The Road: Director's Cut

I like "Kiss Me" because it's bittersweet and nostalgic because it reminds me of 'She's All That' which reminds of Rachel Leigh Cook which reminds me of this girl I was friends with around the time of 'She's All That' who looked alot like Rachel Leigh Cook but then she moved away and after she moved I thoughy 'I wanted to fuck her but I never got the chance' so when I hear "Kiss Me" at Publix (which is like every time I'm there, they've got "Kiss Me" and Air's "All I Need" on a loop or something) I'll sigh. Her name was Kerry.
― James Blount, Tuesday, January 14, 2003 2:44 AM (eighteen years ago) bookmarkflaglink

the one time I got an MRI I made the mistake of asking for the radio to be on, and it was when Adele was big. I'll never forget being trapped motionless in a tube listening to "Never mind I'll fiiiiind, someone like youuuuuuuuuu BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM foooooor youuuuuuuuuuu BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM"

― Lily Dale, Thursday, October 14, 2021 10:08 PM (thirty-one minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

That reminds me very deeply of the radio being on when I was undergoing radiation therapy, usually on some classic rock and soul radio station, and I have a deep memory of singing along to "Black Water" by the Doobies while this crazy machine shot radioactive lasers at my crotch.

My dad drank a glass of milk with dinner every night until he died. Didn’t matter what was being eaten - steak/milk, catfish/milk, chicken fried rice/milk, taco night/milk. Awful.

― papal hotwife (milo z), Thursday, November 4, 2021 6:10 PM (twelve minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

jon, they'd have to be drinking more than a gallon a day PER PERSON, some of whom are small children. That's not remotely normal.

― Ima Gardener (in orbit), Thursday, November 4, 2021 1:25 PM

drinking milk on its own is weird. on cereal, in tea or coffee, fine. in a glass? weird and wrong.

i drank a glass of milk with dinner until i left home ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

i drank the same glass of milk for 20 years

i love milk but i fall down on the side of thinking that drinking a lot of it is weird and probably unhealthy and if i'm going honest a little trashy. could be the influence of california idk.

You bet your ass we’re talking milk on multiple threads!

#justmilkthings

i drank one glass of milk over the course of 20 years
very slowly

^^Like Sarlacc

he drink the milk like Sarlacc
drink the milk like Sarlacc

but cookies tho, are you just never gonna eat another cookie, or only have them with coffee or tea, what kind of life is that, and what about santa. WHAT ABOUT SANTA

xpost assuming this is to the tune of Moves Like Jagger

cookies biscuits are dunked in tea, Father Christmas drinks sweet sherry.

this is known

i think that you will find that biscuits are, in fact, covered in gravy

and what the heck kind of drunkass santa, how’s he even supposed to drive the sleigh, old boy’s gonna crash into someone’s house and be barfing everywhere. pfft, sherry.

https://i.postimg.cc/rprt2K6v/main-qimg-d4106c4a3d18f6dfbe093614a693135d-pjlq.jpg

yr mom drinks sherry.

only at Christmas

And so this is Christmas
And what have you done
Lots of dead kids and reindeer
And Santa's on the run

UK people seem to get horrified at pictures of biscuits and gravy.

"Ew. Is that cat vomit?"

the reason for this is that it looks like cat vomit.

wtf biscuits and gravy are delicious just like BLOOD SAUSAGE oi mates

oh I'm sure it's delicious, I've eaten worse-looking things which tasted fine

wtf biscuits and gravy are delicious just like BLOOD SAUSAGE oi mates

― the utility infielder of theatre (Neanderthal),

it's called MORCILLA, mi socio.

Its called black pudding buck

hey don't bring CRT into this

...wait just a dang minute

if this father christmas guy only drinks sherry

and yr mom also drinks sherry, but only on christmas(!)

i need you to be brutally honest here, not only with me but with yourself:

have you ever seen yr mom in the same room as father christmas?