Elon Musk

we heard you liked tetris so we put tetris in your tesla and also we want you to die

one of the design "quriks" on Teslas is that they have no consistency whatsoever.

I live in a Tesla-heavy town and can confirm this. Start looking at basic defects like doors and trunk lids that don't quite line-up correctly and once you see enough differences among different Teslas it gets pretty obvious.

👀 https://t.co/oZ8yvZgjZ9

— The Urbanist (@UrbanistOrg) December 30, 2021

You realise that if he was ever to become involved in some sort of scandal and subsequent cover-up, newspapers could use the headline, "Elongate"
― Named locally as Tom D (Tom D.), Wednesday, October 31, 2012 4:50 PM (nine years ago) bookmarkflaglink

Is it finally time to use this?

Lol their stock price is actually up today, what a joke

iyo did Elon musk ruin the internet

don’t cars have minor recall/maintenance things all the time? i’m looking for every opportunity to take shots at elon but meh

tbf every tesla probably has a dozen reasons for recall though

This is like half the Teslas ever sold though

they couldn’t admit that they aren’t sure which ones actually need a recall because there was no manual on how to run the camera wires and one team just stapled them to the trunk

i'm a little confused by how this is reported, in part because i'm not sure how unusual it is to not know based on model whether the vehicle will have a defect. i do remember hearing/reading about tesla's lack of standards for components/assembly. the article says 1% of the model 3s in the recall are actually affected. i guess they would normally be able to limit it to a range of VINs.

one would think!

"Don't worry. We can always fix it in the software."

TESLA MOTORS - "Move fast and break things, literally."

can't wait

Boring company's "traffic-jam-solving-tunnel" has traffic jams lol.

Cue everyone telling me that car tubes are more sustainable than an actual functioning public transit network 😉 pic.twitter.com/jLZ6YEhr20

— Matt Lowne (@Matt_Lowne) January 6, 2022

Just wait until a car is disabled.

god the Elon stans are fucking exhausting:

Please explain how "public transit" which has been tried and rejected by the American people is suddenly just gonna start working?

— Kitsune Streaming Co (@co_kitsune) January 6, 2022

please explain how "geometry" which has been tried and rejected by the american automobile is suddenly just going to start working.

love to reject something that exists in only the absolutely most desirable places to live

Imagine all those rejected A line cars shuttling back and forth, empty and forlorn, never to start working.

Just wait until a terrorist puts bombs in self-driving cars at each end of a tunnel.

It's impossible to imagine such a thing, even though you have just imagined it and it would be amazingly simple and effective, if it were even possible to imagine it.

'welp, we tried subways, buses and ferries, they don't work so I guess it's just luxury cars from here on out!'

love to reject something that exists in only the absolutely most desirable places to live

― lag∞n, Thursday, January 6, 2022 1:21 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

this is a good post

I get that driving an automobile can be cool and was really novel in like the 1930s but the complete lack of historical perspective from these people kind of blows my mind

Not that I live a block from where a trolley track used to run and it would have taken directly me to the bar and grocery store that's just over a mile away or anything

*wistfully gazing at the spot where the trolley was*

I can't believe the single lane tunnel thing actually exists. What if a car bricks or randomly starts on fire or experiences any of the other weird issues that Teslas seem to have? How would people get out?

Or is this like the dream scenario for the Bazingas? Is there a nobler death...?

tunnel valhalla

Strong "'No Way To Prevent This,' Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens" energy in that tweet above.

pic.twitter.com/uiHoMrpifZ

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) January 9, 2022

These death tunnels are fun and cool bc no matter how dumb the general population understands that they are, the ppl in charge are just going to do it anyway ☺️

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZaRfNjTPx8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpempCSp2-w

this fuckwad

Canadian truckers rule

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) January 27, 2022

is that why he's going to replace them with self driving trucks?

he just means truckers are the new government of canada which is technically correct

lmao we programmed cars to break the law, what's the big deal??

He’s actually a lobbyist, not a journalist. There are many who pose as the latter while behaving like the former. No integrity.

Indeed, there were no safety issues. The car simply slowed to ~2 mph & continued forward if clear view with no cars or pedestrians.

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) February 1, 2022

this guy is such a piece of shit

sad lol at essentially programming in a rolling stop. Self-driving cars: they're just like us!

new Teslas come with deepfaked footage of you drinking "just one beer with dinner"

i programmed my exploding car to run stop signs slowly in violation of every state's traffic laws

i know no one who is likely to be pulled over can afford this car lol

For that you have to shell out for the self-buying car, which is a bargain.

i'm not going to research this right now but i think nhtsa may frown upon the ceo of a car company publicly saying something is not a safety issue at the same time they are announcing a recall for a safety issue

I have absolutely gotten pulled over for doing this lol

we’ll just have to write new traffic laws to accommodate a weird billionaire pissbaby. I don’t think it will be hard.

xpost But what if *you* didn't roll through the stop, what if it was the car?
https://video-images.vice.com/articles/60c09917f74527009a124228/lede/1623235200851-christine-car-on-fire.jpeg?crop=1xw%3A1xh%3Bcenter%2Ccenter&resize=2000%3A*

xpost - I have a feeling Tesla's legal team is also having a rough morning when seeing their CEO tweet out that the cars are programmed to directly break the law in, afaiui, every state.

"lobbyist" is the new "narc"

well they know that because this is the reason for yet another recall xp