that guy I know who keeps wrecking his teslas (lol) had to wait for a new tesla and his interim used car he bought? a bmw
he has absolutely bizarre choices in motor vehicles, though. he previously went (iirc) from one of the early hyundai hybrids to a hummer to a chevy volt
― mh, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:29 (one year ago) link
(Final follow-up on my fam Tesla history: to be clear the stepsister’s stepdad is a famous basketball coach, that’s the only way she could afford a Tesla.
― recovering internet addict/shitposter (viborg), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:30 (one year ago) link
Probably putting her solidly on the NIMBY squad.
― recovering internet addict/shitposter (viborg), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:32 (one year ago) link
which coach
― in places all over the world, real stuff be happening (voodoo chili), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:35 (one year ago) link
YIMBYs have their own set of problems. that's why i'm an OKIMBY.
― towards fungal computer (harbl), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:35 (one year ago) link
I’m a Bothsidesimby(I think I’ve done enough to ID my stepsister already sorry.)
― recovering internet addict/shitposter (viborg), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:36 (one year ago) link
im a YIMBYBAKLL (yes in my backyard but also kill landlords)
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:37 (one year ago) link
OTMIMBY
― recovering internet addict/shitposter (viborg), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:37 (one year ago) link
(Ok so I doubt anyone here has followed the plot but at one point here I did basically come out with the fact that Nancy Mace, GOP Trump gadfly, is like my 3rd cousin too. My family is a piece of work.)
― recovering internet addict/shitposter (viborg), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:40 (one year ago) link
KIMBY is Elon's brother, right?
― peace, man, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:42 (one year ago) link
the Tesla owners at my workplace have to be some of the most arrogant “I’m smarter than you” type asshats I’ve ever met in my lifetime.
― Western® with Bacon Flavor, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:46 (one year ago) link
saw someone on twitter theorizing his rightward trend was to attract conservative car buyers since hed already burned through dem environmental types via building the worlds shittiest cars, dont think its true but its a cute theory
― OG Bob Sacamano (will), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 18:52 (one year ago) link
xxp
Not to say that all Tesla drivers are douchebags, viborg, just that a plurality of douchebags are Tesla drivers.
― immodesty blaise (jimbeaux), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:01 (one year ago) link
yeah the flaw in the plan is that youre alienating other prospective buyers, but who knows elon is always doing weird short term plays, makes me wonder whats really going on over at tesla, i have speculated about major account fraud itt, just a lot of weird shit idk, maybe its worth it to him for whatever reason to boost teslas sales short term by owning the libs
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:02 (one year ago) link
One trend I can definitely do without is right wingers calling Musk "the country's most successful African-American."
― immodesty blaise (jimbeaux), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:02 (one year ago) link
its such a lame joke but on the other hand at least they got a new joke
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:07 (one year ago) link
he needs to emphasize how environmentally destructive the Tesla is, or maybe make them artificially even more so. like add a fake tailpipe that emits a stench and benzene or something.
― The Hon. Christian Sharia (R - MO) (Hunt3r), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:26 (one year ago) link
All Teslas now come standard with truck nuts and exhaust pipe that emits fart noises whenever a Bernie sticker is picked up within twenty yards.
― a superficial sheeb of intelligence (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:28 (one year ago) link
self drives to nearest steak house for a huge fucking rare rib eye some kick ass bacon and a nice stiff burbon
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:32 (one year ago) link
at work we have a Tesla guy and he makes it the core of his entire personality. he wears nothing but Tesla polos, set his desktop & phone backgrounds to photos of his car, once sent the department a "Tesla FAQ" including lines like "Q: Can I drive it? A: No! Q: Can you take me for a ride? A: Sure!!"
― frogbs, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:43 (one year ago) link
fuckin bleak
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 19:59 (one year ago) link
Xxpost. The Tesla's horn actually can be set to emit fart noises.
― everything, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:00 (one year ago) link
There is a whole fart app. Lots of different fart noises which you can direct outside or to one or several of the internal speakers.
― everything, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:01 (one year ago) link
I’m going to assume that’s actually the one Innovation that Musk personally shepherded from idea to implementation
― OG Bob Sacamano (will), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:12 (one year ago) link
"Not juicy enough, too dry. Back to work."
― a superficial sheeb of intelligence (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:14 (one year ago) link
I've told this story in here before but there's a feature where, if the car detects its being broken into, it'll lock all the doors and play Trans-Siberian Orchestra at max volume. I know this because it erroneously went off on my brother's car with his wife and 1 year old inside. She thought it was loud enough to potentially cause hearing damage. I'm guessing that is another one of Elon's ideas that nobody could say no to.
― frogbs, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:17 (one year ago) link
and ppl really want to question this man’s genious
― OG Bob Sacamano (will), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:18 (one year ago) link
i am pretty sure it's illegal to have a horn that is permanently modified to make non-horn sounds and i understand the app is not that, but it should also be illegal to have the option to do it temporarily because we cannot trust tesla owners to understand that horns are safety devices and that it is hazardous to confuse other drivers on the road with farts
― towards fungal computer (harbl), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:28 (one year ago) link
to be safe teslas should just brick themselves
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:30 (one year ago) link
well, they do, but it's on highways in the travel lane which is not safe
― towards fungal computer (harbl), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:32 (one year ago) link
what happens when lame internet humor from 15 years ago gets weaponized by the world's richest man
― 龜, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:35 (one year ago) link
to be fair, it used to be legal (maybe?) to install flamethrowers in cars as anti-theft devices in south africa
― 龜, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:36 (one year ago) link
I’m sure Elon would want to bring back some other things that used to be legal in South Africa, too
― we need outrage! we need dicks!! (the table is the table), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:46 (one year ago) link
I'm surprised Teslas don't allow you to force drop old Something Awful memes to the screens of other Teslas.
― a superficial sheeb of intelligence (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 20:52 (one year ago) link
Jimbeaux, no worries. It was just the timing really.
― recovering internet addict/shitposter (viborg), Wednesday, 18 May 2022 21:47 (one year ago) link
This article assumes that he's actually not trying to weasel out of the deal, but is just doing some hardball negotiations:
https://www.grid.news/story/technology/2022/05/13/why-elon-musk-cant-just-walk-away-from-the-twitter-deal/
― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, 18 May 2022 21:58 (one year ago) link
at work we have a Tesla guy and he makes it the core of his entire personality. he wears nothing but Tesla polos, set his desktop & phone backgrounds to photos of his car, once sent the department a "Tesla FAQ" including lines like "Q: Can I drive it? A: No! Q: Can you take me for a ride? A: Sure!!"― frogbs, Wednesday, May 18, 2022 3:43 PM (four hours ago) bookmarkflaglink
― frogbs, Wednesday, May 18, 2022 3:43 PM (four hours ago) bookmarkflaglink
*brushes up resume*
― Hillary Queenton (PBKR), Thursday, 19 May 2022 00:08 (one year ago) link
that faq thing is blowing my mind
― mh, Thursday, 19 May 2022 00:17 (one year ago) link
same here tbh.
― we need outrage! we need dicks!! (the table is the table), Thursday, 19 May 2022 01:07 (one year ago) link
Wow.
― Legalize Suburban Benches (Raymond Cummings), Thursday, 19 May 2022 01:26 (one year ago) link
At a Twitter all-hands right now, execs told employees that they are not open to renegotiating the purchase price with Elon Musk.I’m told that champagne was popped in the New York office.— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) May 19, 2022
― lag∞n, Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:30 (one year ago) link
yeah but they're always drinking heavily in that office
― Bruce Stingbean (Karl Malone), Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:32 (one year ago) link
Meanwhile in Slack, one employee changed their screen name to “The Algorithm” and is encouraging everyone to drink whenever an executive says “fiduciary”— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) May 19, 2022
― lag∞n, Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:34 (one year ago) link
It’s true
― 𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:36 (one year ago) link
It was a good all hands I’m told
no elon just vibes
― lag∞n, Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:38 (one year ago) link
"Q: Can I drive it? A: No! Q: Can you take me for a ride? A: Sure!!"
I'm fucking dying
― jmm, Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:39 (one year ago) link
I know "The Algorithm" - I think he did that a while ago though…
― carson dial, Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:40 (one year ago) link
many are taking the above tweets to mean the deal is off but not everyone
they’re all twitter shareholders and they’re getting (maybe!) a windfall from the world’s richest man who’s been taunting them for weeks, it’s gotta feel like catharsis— farhad manjoo (@fmanjoo) May 19, 2022
― lag∞n, Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:43 (one year ago) link
fight for what
Champagne was popped because they want the deal to go through or because they think he'll back out?— Jason Schreier (@jasonschreier) May 19, 2022
i think it’s a ‘we are not going down without a fight’ type of thing— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) May 19, 2022
― lag∞n, Thursday, 19 May 2022 17:44 (one year ago) link