Elon Musk

There is a whole fart app. Lots of different fart noises which you can direct outside or to one or several of the internal speakers.

I’m going to assume that’s actually the one Innovation that Musk personally shepherded from idea to implementation

"Not juicy enough, too dry. Back to work."

I've told this story in here before but there's a feature where, if the car detects its being broken into, it'll lock all the doors and play Trans-Siberian Orchestra at max volume. I know this because it erroneously went off on my brother's car with his wife and 1 year old inside. She thought it was loud enough to potentially cause hearing damage. I'm guessing that is another one of Elon's ideas that nobody could say no to.

and ppl really want to question this man’s genious

i am pretty sure it's illegal to have a horn that is permanently modified to make non-horn sounds and i understand the app is not that, but it should also be illegal to have the option to do it temporarily because we cannot trust tesla owners to understand that horns are safety devices and that it is hazardous to confuse other drivers on the road with farts

to be safe teslas should just brick themselves

well, they do, but it's on highways in the travel lane which is not safe

what happens when lame internet humor from 15 years ago gets weaponized by the world's richest man

to be fair, it used to be legal (maybe?) to install flamethrowers in cars as anti-theft devices in south africa

I’m sure Elon would want to bring back some other things that used to be legal in South Africa, too

I'm surprised Teslas don't allow you to force drop old Something Awful memes to the screens of other Teslas.

Jimbeaux, no worries. It was just the timing really.

This article assumes that he's actually not trying to weasel out of the deal, but is just doing some hardball negotiations:

https://www.grid.news/story/technology/2022/05/13/why-elon-musk-cant-just-walk-away-from-the-twitter-deal/

at work we have a Tesla guy and he makes it the core of his entire personality. he wears nothing but Tesla polos, set his desktop & phone backgrounds to photos of his car, once sent the department a "Tesla FAQ" including lines like "Q: Can I drive it? A: No! Q: Can you take me for a ride? A: Sure!!"

― frogbs, Wednesday, May 18, 2022 3:43 PM (four hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

*brushes up resume*

that faq thing is blowing my mind

same here tbh.

Wow.

At a Twitter all-hands right now, execs told employees that they are not open to renegotiating the purchase price with Elon Musk.

I’m told that champagne was popped in the New York office.

— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) May 19, 2022

yeah but they're always drinking heavily in that office

Meanwhile in Slack, one employee changed their screen name to “The Algorithm” and is encouraging everyone to drink whenever an executive says “fiduciary”

— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) May 19, 2022

It’s true

It was a good all hands I’m told

no elon just vibes

"Q: Can I drive it? A: No! Q: Can you take me for a ride? A: Sure!!"

I'm fucking dying

I know "The Algorithm" - I think he did that a while ago though…

many are taking the above tweets to mean the deal is off but not everyone

they’re all twitter shareholders and they’re getting (maybe!) a windfall from the world’s richest man who’s been taunting them for weeks, it’s gotta feel like catharsis

— farhad manjoo (@fmanjoo) May 19, 2022

fight for what

Champagne was popped because they want the deal to go through or because they think he'll back out?

— Jason Schreier (@jasonschreier) May 19, 2022

i think it’s a ‘we are not going down without a fight’ type of thing

— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) May 19, 2022

if anyone has any insight but would prefer not to post here feel free to dm me on twitter dont com

haha that's insider trading no thank u!

it's all in those tweets though. and in any case, leadership/the board are not going to share anything non-public with rank-and-file employees (they can't without out also making it public).

im not going to buy any stock i want to own the secrets

haha yes

Elon's campaign to publicly troll and preemptively alienate the entire workforce of the company he's trying to buy was a bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for him. https://t.co/gugU6rV8cN

— Will Oremus (@WillOremus) May 19, 2022

(i mean we're still fucked, dont get me wrong)

fight for what

presumably the original terms of the deal, which elon is now claiming is void because he was relying on what he says is incorrect information supplied by twitter and twitter claims is correct

i think there's a "we want whatever he doesn't want" element to it, and clearly he doesn't want to pay 54.20.

elon paying way above market for a company where all the employees hate him would be something

ofc he doesn't want to pay $54.20. but he can still back out entirely by paying the indemnification, which I heard was $1bn.

apparently they can make him go through with the deal if they want we talked about it upthread

Lmao aimless thank you as ever for your insight.

how would you answer the q: "fight for what?"

he's so fucking stupid

Unless it is stopped, the woke mind virus will destroy civilization and humanity will never reached Mars

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) May 19, 2022

he's really gunning for best poster right now. twitter should ban him for the lulz

Yang and Amash showing up in replies to his "we need a moderate party" tweet like "yes sir, reporting for duty sir"...is there a word for when you're both a con artist and a mark?

pathetic thing about this country is a "moderate" party would probably be left of where the Dems currently stand

Yang and Amash showing up in replies to his "we need a moderate party" tweet like "yes sir, reporting for duty sir"...is there a word for when you're both a con artist and a mark?

― rob

smark

twitter abhors a main character vacuum and once trump got the boot it was inevitable someone would take his place as the ultimate main character

otm but what grates is he's doing it so deliberately. trump wouldn't have a clue what "the main character on twitter" means to his credit

I like "smark" lol

I will never forgive the media for trying to make this guy look like some kind of brilliant visionary like Thomas Edison

btw if you were wondering what the "woke mind virus" is, it's unions and the people who sue Elon Musk for being a gigantic racist:

NEW: Elon Musk says he’ll vote for Republicans this year because “the Democratic Party is overly controlled by the unions and…class-action lawyers.”

Musk is a notorious union-buster & was hit with a class-action lawsuit from 1k Black workers who alleged rampant racism at Tesla. pic.twitter.com/2SEUBTgDXm

— More Perfect Union (@MorePerfectUS) May 18, 2022

is there a home rapid test for the woke mind virus? i dont want to needlessly expose anyone and be the reason we dont get to mars