US Politics, December 2022: "They're now the working class party, man."

now THAT i'd love to see, literal shitting on the senate floor

https://processedmedia.files.wordpress.com/2013/07/mr-show-s1-ep4-3.png

didn't she dress like that once

ChatGPC helping me write alternate future history:

Hello, and thank you for coming to hear my concession speech.

I am truly bewildered at the results of this election. I am shocked and disappointed that I did not receive a single vote.

I want to congratulate Tony Hawk on his historic victory and his impressive performance in the electoral college. I also want to thank all of the voters who participated in this election.

I am grateful for the support and encouragement I received during my campaign, and I am humbled by the opportunity to have run for President.

While this is not the outcome I had hoped for, I accept the will of the people and I will continue to work to make our country a better place.

Thank you again for your support.

[Kyrsten Sinema is hit in the face with a pie thrown by Tom Higgins. She looks surprised and confused, but quickly recovers and walks offstage]

Re: Griner's release

Bout’s conviction in 2011 came after years of painstaking effort by US intelligence, diplomatic and law-enforcement agencies; exchanging such a dangerous criminal for an athlete with no discernible intelligence value to Russia is, unavoidably, an affront to the US justice system.

By one estimate, 60 US citizens are currently held as hostages or otherwise wrongfully detained overseas. Given the administration’s self-congratulatory social-media barrage following the release, it’s hard to escape the conclusion that Griner’s celebrity was a major reason her cause was treated with outsized urgency. Whelan’s family gave a very generous statement celebrating Griner’s release — while also noting that it was “a catastrophe for Paul.” Other families may feel the same way.

https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2022-12-09/biden-cut-a-costly-deal-for-brittney-griner?srnd=premium-asia

exchanging such a dangerous criminal

o no he might go back to competing with OUR arms dealers

it’s hard to escape the conclusion that Griner’s celebrity was a major reason her cause was treated with outsized urgency

I can't muster any outrage at this conclusion. hundreds of thousands of people exert much greater political influence than just a few hundreds of people can hope to generate.

an athlete with no discernible intelligence value to Russia

get fucked

re: the Bloomberg opinion and the trade

http://twitter.com/Sharon_Kuruvila/status/1601224322051624960

Sorry, not sure why that didn't work. Quote from that tweet re: Bloomberg and other such reactions:

fundamentally the vast majority of people whining about this have not cared about the Merchant of Death right up to the point he could be used as a card against the government

the real reason people are bitching is because they somehow think the Black lesbian should have been left to rot in a gulag

interesting that paul whelan is being used as the foil here cause it seems like he might actually have been up to some shit, also the government has said that russia wants more for him so its not like it was a choice between him and griner

I think there's some ex-KGB hitman in a German prison, and Russia wants the U.S. to exert heavy pressure

Also the people running around calling Whelan "a Marine" tend to leave out this bit:

Whelan served with the Marine Corps Reserve from 2003-2008, much of the time as an administrative clerk in Iraq. At the end of that period, he was dishonourably discharged for larceny and other lesser offences, after being found to have tried to steal $10,000.

lol

also has a history of lying about law enforcement experience and at the time of his arrest was "director of global security and investigations for BorgWarner, an international automotive parts manufacturer based in Michigan" ie he exactly fits the profile of someone who might try to do some amateur spying

Also his family's statement was gracious and made super clear that the two cases are completely different and it was never an either or. That Bloomberg writer is a piece of shit.

read that as BongWater xpost

Majority Leader Sinema?

There’s no better way for Democrats to show their commitment to bipartisanship than by making the quirky triathlete the Senate boss.

— New York Times Pitchbot (@DougJBalloon) December 9, 2022

triathlete huh bike accident just an idea

read that as BongWater xpost

Who else will join her Chenin Blanc Caucus?

A caucus of one is no caucus at all

I saw someone tweet that Sinema either needed more attention or less attention at some earlier stages of her life, but either way it's too late now.

*chef's kiss* pic.twitter.com/Va74BB6EG9

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) December 9, 2022

Famous people you thought were dead...

Probably mixed him up w/the Dad from ALF.

That’s Mr Willie Tanner to you!

https://edition.cnn.com/2022/12/09/politics/kari-lake-election-lawsuit-arizona/index.html

"Defeated Arizona Republican gubernatorial candidate Kari Lake has filed suit in Arizona Superior Court challenging the certification of the state’s election."

Seeing that photo of Lieberman takes me back to Days of Hangdog Sanctimony Past.

Xpost so it's basically just "It's fraud because who wouldn't want to vote for me?"

Like Trump, she cannot imagine anyone not voting for her.

Benjy Sarlin tweets: Yesterday’s dumb “they won’t arrest him because of his donations” conspiracy becomes tomorrow’s “they arrested him to stop his testimony” conspiracy, just putting down a marker

Yesterday’s dumb “they won’t arrest him because of his donations” conspiracy becomes tomorrow’s “they arrested him to stop his testimony” conspiracy, just putting down a marker

— Benjy Sarlin (@BenjySarlin) December 13, 2022

And then the comments go on to prove him exactly immediately right.

I just realized I never eulogized the Iowa caucuses

rip, you probably made my state worse

At one Des Moines precinct tonight, an attendee brought in a concealed bottle of wine, dropped it, and it shattered everywhere pic.twitter.com/qHNMP6NLOH

— Iowa Starting Line (@IAStartingLine) February 4, 2020

(I’m pretty sure that was at my precinct lol)

(I’m pretty sure that was at my precinct lol)

double posting? sounds like someone's been drinking coat wine

So the FTX guy can commit fraud, be charged and arrested and extradited in seemingly less than a month, while Trump can literally have stolen classified docs scattered around his house and the case will take years?

I don't remember FTX attempting to overthrow the govt.

it seems like years, but the FBI raid was 4 months ago and things went on hold for a good chunk of that time due to midterm elections and the special master stuff that just got thrown out

so

BREAKING: 2,319 texts from Mark Meadows now public, showing 34 Republican members of Congress texting with him about January 6, the fake electors, and declaring martial law (or "Marshall Law," sic), per Talking Points Memo.

the coup cucks clan

(sorry I hate the word cucks I just couldn't resist.)

Lots of people talk about martial law while in office. Lots of people. I'm hearing - Marshall Law, it's a thing that a lot of cabinet members discuss. Obama talked about Marsha law all the time. All the time. Many times. There is nothing unusual about that. Nothing. Maxwell Law gets talked about in elections frequently. this was not a coup. not a coup.

We were just talking about legal decisions written by Thurgood Marshall

Pretty sure they are referencing Marcia Law, which gives the US Military carte blanche to throw footballs at the noses of civilians that break curfew.

I know TPM is making a big deal about these texts, and there's probably more to come, but does any of it amount to proof of chargeable crimes or is it just general assholery?

Dying at “Maxwell Law”

enforced with silver hammers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zk71h2CQ_xM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUnNDEygBjA

Moodles I don't know if asking a President to declare martial law is in itself a crime, as they could just say "well he could say no!".

but it's part of a broader conspiracy I would guess. I'm no lawyer though.

i tried calling marshall law once but he wasn’t home

i called marshall law once in his vegetable garden but he said, my name’s not law, and i said, you can say that again

so he said my name’s not law

and then he arrested me for disturbing the peas