Posts you had second thought about and decided not to post - put them here

halcyon days when ILM didn't give a shit about this bollocks

Beebehwaddoweego
Sommerolahweeno-oh

posters you had pleasantly forgotten but have recently been reminded of their existence, bitch about them here

Oh god did I really write that an approach "was almost always agglutinative - building up thin layers of harmony that become orchestral in the aggregate"? What a pretentious ass. God, there should be some kind of ignition lock on my keyboard like they have for drunk drivers. I should be barred from posting unless I can demonstrate an appropriate level of good sense and humility.

glutin free is more accessible

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcpwuK1Fmx4

This generation has its Call of Duty Modern Warfares. We had real war simulators
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9cp4tlrGYY

could you get a new fuckin' schtick please?

Next phase, new wave, dance craze, anyways
It's still indie shit to me

God I hate fucking Fugazi

don't fuck 'em then

doctor doctor it hoitz when i go like this

orange you glad I... to hell with it

nobody ever sat me down and gave me the talk about being black but then again i was raised by the white parent and grandparent. but was always obvious that i stood out because of how i looked in that nobody at primary school was the same colour as me and only one other pupil at secondary school. by the time i got to the age where i was out by myself wariness and watchfulness of my surroundings was second nature. which pubs you could go into or even walk past and which ones you couldn't. if going to a new place sensing when it was probably best to leave sharpish etc strangely the one aspect that completely passed me by and fortunately has had no bad consequences is that i was never particularly wary of the police, probably because not living in a city i barely ever saw them or interacted with them luckily.

It's like Turrican but without all the wit and charisma

It'd be a derail on the thread, but "in tune with their feelings and thoughts around sex, gender, and etc" is just _so_ far from my recollection of being a teenager.

I probably should have clarified: one of the things that's constantly being thrown into anti-trans rhetoric is that kids are confused and are being unduly influenced/"groomed" by adults, which implies that kids are unaware and have no agency in regards to their own feelings and thoughts around the most intimate aspects of their lives.

But I was told CONSTANTLY as a teenager that I couldn't *possibly* know that I was gay, and all that this did was turn me into a closet-case anorexic who moved from eating disorders to uninhibited drug and alcohol abuse. I had to come out THREE TIMES, for the final time at the age of 23. I lost years of emotional and interpersonal development around intimacy and relationships, and only entered a more healthy relationship stage in my mid-30s under the threat of my own mortality.

The absolute disregard, disrespect, and delegitimization of teenagers' thoughts and feelings is a huge part of anti-lgbtq+ rhetoric, and when so-called "liberals" repeat these sorts of talking points, they're merely showing that they, too, don't actually care about children or the sanctity of life or their professed politics, but only about reinforcing cis heteropatriarchal power structures.

It'd be a derail on the thread, but "in tune with their feelings and thoughts around sex, gender, and etc" is just _so_ far from my recollection of being a teenager.

and when so-called "liberals" repeat these sorts of talking points, they're merely showing that they, too, don't actually care about children or the sanctity of life or their professed politics, but only about reinforcing cis heteropatriarchal power structures.

it revolves around this larger issue of how to determine when a person is entitled to agency and how it feels like that "magic age" gets further and further delayed, at least here in the US ... like increasing the age at when someone can drink alcohol or purchase cigarettes or attend kindergarten, which have some thoughtful, compassionate arguments in favor of the delay, but these things are also coming from this place of protection and restriction of agency ... and I disagree with the statement that the "liberals" "don't actually care about children" ... just that the ways they are "caring" are fucked up in this context.

xp - you can't post a thread-derailing irrelevancy here, this is the 'second thoughts about posting to the correct thread' thread

fascists and conservatives worship "the child" while hating and brutalising actual children and plenty of liberals seem to be on board with this especially the most prominent ones, it doesn't really matter if they're coming from different places (I'm not sure about that myself) if they do the exact same thing

true "impact" vs "intent" is key here

I just don’t think that liberals “caring” about this issue usually amounts to anything more than those people being homophobic or transphobic

true "impact" vs "intent" is key here

― sarahell

speaking for myself good intent isn't a mitigating factor. if anything stuff like the new york times article has way more impact on me than whatever bullshit tucker carlson is saying on his show this week. i don't talk to my racist aunt who pretends to be a "principled conservative". i talk to and care about my liberal relatives who read the new york times and are influenced by what's in the new york times, and i'm not keen on the prospect of having to justify my existence to them or waste my time trying to debunk this week's version of the same bullshit disingenuous talking points about sports, bathrooms, etc. i saw julia serano, who has devoted a great deal of her career to educating people on these issues and debunking this nonsense, has finally just thrown up her hands and said "fuck it, bingo meme".

as much as we like to talk about "self-determination" the truth is that if that's all it took, i would have transitioned 25 years ago. we need cis allies. we need support. we need recognition. those of us who don't get that support, who don't have the opportunity to address our dysphoria through gender-affirming treatment... well, all of us know what the other option is. and with liberals... it feels like that support _is_ always conditional, that we perpetually have to keep justifying our existence to them. a lot of the liberals i know, they don't want to be on my side, they want to be on _everyone's_ side. that attitude doesn't do me any fucking good.

but if you're for me and against the people who want me dead, are you really a liberal at all? or are you _something else_?

I think that kind of contradiction (in various forms) is inherent to liberalism and part of why it feels some combination of ineffectual and complicit in the face of right wing terror, the history of liberals tolerating/advocating awful illiberal ideas and policies is pretty much the history of liberalism

a lot of the liberals i know, they don't want to be on my side, they want to be on _everyone's_ side

truth bomb

so much of liberalism is about mitigating guilt ime. protecting white goodness/innocence essentially. i think that impulse explains a lot of the helicopter / protective parenting too. there isn't a principled thesis or viewpoint on anything behind it & no honest "chips in the game" so to speak. that, in some ways, is more dangerous than people who have a clear identity or vision they stand for, even if it's of the fascist variety.

The problem with liberalism is its identification with pluralism: liberals want Every Voice Heard, in part because they can pat their own backs and because increased newspaper/mag subscriptions = pluralism.

If you don't recognize when ideas and beliefs are antithetical to your own, then the chances are good that you have no ideas or beliefs, just a bunch of random noise instead.

thinking about it my issues with liberalism run deeper than concern over having to justify my existence to my rich liberal relatives. i honestly believe that the single biggest obstacle to my transition was my internalized liberalism. it wasn't until my liberal beliefs had been shattered that i was able to justify my existence to _myself_.

i think map's description of how liberalism worked for me is essentially accurate. it kept me in a state of "white innocence", which is to say ignorance. for me, the events of 2016 shattered that belief system. i had a hard fucking time dealing with it. part of this artificial state of innocence was the belief that donald trump absolutely was not going to be the next president. i was invested enough in this idea that in the event he won, i planned to kill myself. my internalized liberalism actually ran that deep, that i was willing to go full fucking nero decree over it.

anyway, i didn't, but the experience shocked me into needing to confront, for the first time, the question of who i was and who i wanted to be. if we were all basically the same deep down, all basically wanted the same stuff, than i didn't have to actually consider my own beliefs and desires. i could let other people do that for me, and as long as i was a cishet white man, that was going to work out just fine for me.

in other words, the liberal beliefs i was taught coerced me into performing my own self-erasure. i'm not really a fan of that, personally. i don't feel like those values are basically good values.

I suspect the endlessly contentious and apocalyptic US Politics threads have led a cadre of ilxors to remove I Love Everything from their Site New Answers, so they may never see this poll.

i remember when she was in a mediocre indie band that i had to show enthusiasm about ...

just wondering how some people have the mental fortitude to pick fights with people over basically nothing on a daily basis. what do they get out of it? is it fun? I couldn't live my life like that.

otm

I give in upon occasion but daily basis would wreck me.

Last two things I’ve “picked fights about” on ilx:

- unperson crowing about what a great feminist he was after using the term young pussy and telling me I just didn’t get why that was non offensive on a thread where the topic had moved to older men targeting much younger women
- someone trotting out that great old chestnut about a woman who was a prude being a secret slut, cos it’s not like that is an extremely questionable line of thought that’s played out badly before or anything

Every time I do this it takes time from the stuff I come on ilx to do, reading and responding to posts. How much would I like to spend my days on my baseball thread blogging about Barry Zito and never once feeling uneasy about stuff I’ve seen on here? Very much, my non-friend!

I don’t actually come here to start fights over basically nothing (cool that these things are nothing to you, whereas I have to make the choice “Is it worth saying something?” knowing that the person on the receiving end is most likely going to be a prick about it and that really it doesn’t bother most ilxors whether female ilxors are disturbed or annoyed at having to see this shit unchallenged in a shared space. I know this because so often I am the first person saying something, but it would be good to know that it’s my mental fortitude that’s the problem and not, for example, how comfortable I feel reading this stuff on a place that has been my internet home for over a decade. And believe me when I say that I am not just speaking for myself on this.

Sounds so reasonable - but you also posted:

Fully aware that you meant this in a cunty way, but fuck, so much of this site is utterly dead and boring. People leaning into their stale shticks and bumping threads nearly as old as I am to make fart jokes, fuck off. Maybe people should make better fucking posts or threads so there’d be more interesting activity on here and then you wouldn’t get tons of bored aggro people showing up to shit on this subject they clearly have zero interest in because it was made by a person they don’t like! Seriously, I manage to stay out of 99% threads that don’t interest me because I hope the threads will die, so why can’t the rest of you? That’s a serious question. This thread is not great but it’s really not that offensive either. Will always default to “put up or shut up” personally!
― here you go, muttonchops Yaz (gyac), Tuesday, January 31, 2023 9:03 AM (eight minutes ago)

Which is pretty much the equivalent of 'You're all idiots - I'll take you all on"

or, in visual form:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JzBqc91C-Ig

Are you still mad because you made that stupid joke in my thread and I told you so? Lmao.

By the way, the post you copied was from when a load of people were trolling Left’s thread with some not very veiled homophobia and I was angry that this was the thing they decide to get active on, so yeah. Again, context matters.

https://www.pluggedin.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/the-grudge-1024x660.jpg

storing up (decontextualized) old grievances is a very weird look Luna S

Change your tune Luna. Enough already.

Just for people who don’t know/care, this relates to my boundaries thread, which is a thread I made about a topic that is important to me. There were several stupid posts where people started posting trollish things, I was irritated by this, LS posted this:


I find 'boundaries' a very amorphous concept. It feels useful, but I'm not sure the meaning stays the same across different contexts (personal, work, family, online/social media) where the sense of 'self' can differ.

For boundaries to work, you have to enforce them...

Many relationships seem to have more complicated arrangements than the Northern Ireland protocol, and with a greater variety of 'no hard border' and 'backstop' solutions, and protracted negotiations and threats to trigger unilateral dissolution.

― Luna Schlosser, Thursday, 6 January 2022 14:02 (one year ago) link

Congratulations, that’s the stupidest post yet itt

― mardheamac (gyac), Thursday, 6 January 2022 14:06 (one year ago) link

Thanks - I take my plaudits where I can find them!

― Luna Schlosser, Thursday, 6 January 2022 14:10 (one year ago) link

I guess you’d have to.

― mardheamac (gyac), Thursday, 6 January 2022 14:12 (one year ago) link

So yeah, not exactly the nicest I’ve ever been on ilx. Then this:

Oh - this was the thread where my "stupidest post yet itt" unsurprisingly went straight over gyac's head.

― Luna Schlosser, Wednesday, 21 December 2022 12:14 (one month ago) link

So yeah. If LS and others have such a problem with such really banal pushback to the point of bringing it up almost a year later and repeatedly across other threads, I’m questioning whether I’m the one with the problem. Because it’s not the first time I’ve had someone hyperfocus on me after some mild pushback and I’m frankly pretty sick of it. That’s even taking out the context that being female online is so full of this shit routinely! Frankly could do without it! Killfile exists!

I don't have any personal grievance with gyac - to be clear.

I do notice that gyac is a particularly combative poster - and i'm pointing it out.

Over stuff you think is trivial and unimportant, yes. Killfile me. I don’t like you or your grudge.

A combative poster on ilx? Really?!

Have to say it absolutely kills me reading male posters pointing out how bad sexism is and how they’re such good guys for noticing, but pointing out sexist comments on here and the absurd trolling towards one of ilx’s few female posters just isn’t a thing. And of course I’m combative for not just ignoring it.

Seriously, I manage to stay out of 99% threads that don’t interest me because I hope the threads will die, so why can’t the rest of you? That’s a serious question.

Because of the agreement on unfettered access - no new checks on posts crossing thread borders.

― Luna Schlosser, Tuesday, 31 January 2023 23:18 (two weeks ago) link

No personal grievance though. I didn’t laugh at this man’s joke over a year ago.

I think I was the model of politeness on that boundaries thread btw and elsewhere . A polite poster on ilx ? Really!

I mean if you are pointing out combativeness in a poster on the internet you are pointing out nothing.

What is your actual issue?