A new list to rip to shreds: Maxim's 30 Worst Albums of all Time.

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And how do any of the last three long Voice pieces I've done (White Stripes, Eminem as a dad, Eminem/Kid Rock), or for that matter, the singles column I was writing for a couple years, connect AT ALL to the alleged "approach" you imagine in my writing? Feel free to go to villagevoice.com and search my name if you want; I'm really curious, and the articles are there for you to dissect. But you won't.

>> I can't think of very many books that contain MORE illustration and investigation in them;<<

I meant books about rock music here, by the way; not auto manuals or the Bill James Baseball Abstract or the Bible or whatever.

― chuck, Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:11 (twenty years ago) link

what about those puckish auto manuals that recommend parts for FOREIGN CARS, how insouciant!!

― trife (simon_tr), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:16 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.sound2cb.com/education/teaching/lmu/lmuono/mario.jpg

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:22 (twenty years ago) link

I can't believe I ever had a problem with Trife! Now I want him to run for president.

― Nicole (Nicole), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:24 (twenty years ago) link

o that was silly, forgive me. i have to finish work up or i'll get in trouble, but suffice to say that chuck's right, i'm basing my judgement on a narrow sliver of his work and i should admit that. so my jibes stand only for his contributions to a number of ilm threads, similar to my jibes in sterling's direction.

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:25 (twenty years ago) link

what is that, an electrical vagina?

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:26 (twenty years ago) link

for trife:

puckish, a.: Of the nature of or characteristic of Puck; impish, mischievous, capricious. Hence puckishly adv.; puckishness.

insouciance, n.: Carelessness, indifference, unconcern.

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:28 (twenty years ago) link

jess if you are ever administered a rorscach test my advice is to lie!

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:29 (twenty years ago) link

amateurist did you make some sort of vow to carry on the indie guilt c/d thread? dont forget to end your wigga tags when you endlessly accuse ilm of pretending to like stuff

― trife (simon_tr), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:29 (twenty years ago) link

Jess, you are my favorite person on the entire planet right now.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:29 (twenty years ago) link

it's like the eye of sauron

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:31 (twenty years ago) link

trife you have an uncanny ability to hone in on all of ilm's bugaboos!

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:33 (twenty years ago) link

Can I just mention here that Amateurist's complaint w/r/t Chuck Eddy = my complaint with regard to Chuck Klosterman? (Which I think does turn out to be a different complaint than the one Chuck and Trife are mounting defenses against.)

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:34 (twenty years ago) link

ilm = a bunch of rutting hobbits

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:35 (twenty years ago) link

That makes it sound better than it really is.

― Nicole (Nicole), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:36 (twenty years ago) link

have they never read american psycho?

They are American Psycho ...

― brian nemtusak (sanlazaro), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:44 (twenty years ago) link

Arguments like this make me want to move to the Highlands, take up the bagpipes, and never listen to pop again.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:46 (twenty years ago) link

Anyway, about this list, I think we need to keep in mind that Maxim for the most part amounts to one long jokey sidebar of cheeky lists illustrated with pictures of tan girls in bras, and as such this is less a "real" list of music and more a collection of jokes the readership's expected to get whether or not they're actually familiar with the records in question -- which is a slightly different thing from "easy targets." The number of people who appreciate jokes about Yoko Ono sucking is about a thousand times larger than the number of people who have ever heard more than ten seconds of Yoko Ono's actual music; making jokes about Regis Philbin and David Hasselhoff is pretty much extra-musical; making jokes about Yanni, Ace of Base, Milli Vanilli, or Debbie Gibson is a tried-and-true knee-jerk. Put them all together with Vanilla Ice and you've got a Leno monologue. It's more interesting, I suppose, where they pick on their own readership's used-bin contributions, like the REM and Pearl Jam, but I don't think there's any point in pretending that this is much more than a convenient piece of sidebar-standup.

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:51 (twenty years ago) link

No more hobbit talk you filthy bestialists.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:52 (twenty years ago) link

I'd also guess that the manpower put into assembling the list was one tenth of that put into the picture of the hardbody in the sexy-construction-worker outfit steamrolling a pile of CDs that surely accompanied it.

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 18:53 (twenty years ago) link

Maxim: We are, in one single embodiment, every asshole you have ever met in your entire life. We were the guys who thought quoting Austin Powers was funny... 3 years after the movie came out. We call beers "brewski's," we watch the Super Bowl and laugh hysterically at all of the ads, and after giving a high five, we offer on more "down low" only to pull our hand away and exclaim with joy "too slow!"

This is our literature. We seriously aren't aware of the fact that Leonard Nemoy released an album of hippie songs sung by an alien, and HE knew it was a joke too. We think foreign people totally suck and are gay, especially that European dance crap for pansies, Ace of Bass can totally suck it, give us some Kid Rock baby!

Now excuse us, we have to make room for our new poll, "What's Better, Chicks, Cars, or Brewski's?"

― David Allen, Tuesday, 8 July 2003 20:43 (twenty years ago) link

David Allen is the Pope of OTM!

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 20:45 (twenty years ago) link

(Sadly / Thankfully) that's a big underestimation of Maxim. Jockiness has reckoned with cool and become a slippery, complicated, and quite a bit sharper beast.

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 20:47 (twenty years ago) link

Jockiness has reckoned with cool and become a slippery,complicated, and quite a bit sharper beast.

.....to you, maybe.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 20:55 (twenty years ago) link

yeah, take THAT nabisco!

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 20:57 (twenty years ago) link

ha ha alex!!! anyway maxim is ok and sort of cool but pretty much the same thing as ilm now, check their very uncool beatles dicksuck hating on the sgt peppers soundtrack and ono box!! yes maxim surely the worst album of all time would be one that makes the beatles sound bad!! ilm too in compulsive listmaking and the idea that there is 'bad' music, also for every thirty acts mentioned theres two token rap picks corresponding perfectly with the ilm 1/15 hiphop ratio

― trife (simon_tr), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:01 (twenty years ago) link

also david allen even though youve obv never read maxim do you hate beer and women?!!?!

― trife (simon_tr), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:04 (twenty years ago) link

See, the funny thing is, Alex, Nabisco was actually expressing YOUR opinion.

Fucking x-post w/ Jess. I shouldn't bother trying.

― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:04 (twenty years ago) link

trife you are ~~speaking truth to power!~~ getting annoying

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:20 (twenty years ago) link

I just realized that the remarks after each title on the list are aimed at the reader, "If you own it." That's mean!

― Sam J. (samjeff), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:27 (twenty years ago) link

wow very perceptive you have clearly seen right through my 'schtick' just as you did w sterl and chuck, ok everybody yall can stop talking now amateurist has spoken

― trife (simon_tr), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:29 (twenty years ago) link

Trife, do you watch The Man Show a lot? What, don't you like girls on trampolines?

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:30 (twenty years ago) link

I'm so glad trife is there to defend poor downtrodden hip-hop, which really is the center of the musical universe and the other 1000 or so genres that exist are not

― M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:34 (twenty years ago) link

~~headache~~ smile

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:35 (twenty years ago) link

(not directed at you Matos my flower)

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:35 (twenty years ago) link

yes matos and certainly as a critic you can testify it is talked about enough currently and interestingly given its status as the most popular music on earth, and especially not overshadowed by the same twenty or so music crit touchstone classic rock albums

― trife (simon_tr), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:37 (twenty years ago) link

I'm glad amateurist is here to define 'real' good taste against insouciant punks like chuck eddy and trife who listen to hip-hop and pop just to give 'honest' (look it up in your dictionary amateurist) people headaches.

― James Blount (James Blount), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:38 (twenty years ago) link

trife - but noone listens to hip-hop (or ace of base) unless they're trying to give amateurist a headache!

― James Blount (James Blount), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:39 (twenty years ago) link

or at least they don't actually think it's good

― James Blount (James Blount), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:39 (twenty years ago) link

and here we were thinking geir had left us

― James Blount (James Blount), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:39 (twenty years ago) link

Whew! The dicks are swinging in here today!

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:40 (twenty years ago) link

Someone buy Blount a a Boeing and send Darni3ll3 the bill!

― Cozen (Cozen), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:42 (twenty years ago) link

i feel like i've occupied a suite in the tower of babel. i've never said anything about disliking hip hop or pop, nor have i ever impugned sterling's or chuck eddy's sincerity in liking this music.

my headaches come precisely from this confusion, from trife's fondness for the red herring, and for blount's eagerness in scarfing said herring up.

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:42 (twenty years ago) link

trife, give us a break on this "no one talks about it at ALL" shit, it is talked about a lot, however stupidly (which means a lot of it is) but for Christ's sake you're getting all wound up about a FUCKING JOKE LIST PUBLISHED THREE YEARS AGO IN MAXIM!!!!

― M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:43 (twenty years ago) link

who's invoking the caps lock matos?

― James Blount (James Blount), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:43 (twenty years ago) link

look amateurist i dont like you either but i dont piss and moan about you posting in every thread you post to, id be glad to ignore you for real!! just stop pulling out the bitchy 'oh its TRIFE again' groans anytime i say anything, and stop telling people theyre only pretending to like music too ok!!

― trife (simon_tr), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:43 (twenty years ago) link

and trife, I'm hardly defending Amateurist, I'm making fun of YOU for riding the SAME FUCKING HOBBYHORSE over and over again. it's just as tiresome as Amst's.

― M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:44 (twenty years ago) link

amateurist - you've never impugned sterling or chuck eddy's sincerity in liking this music?

― James Blount (James Blount), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:44 (twenty years ago) link

(quietly to matos: what is my hobbyhorse? i'm not even sure what i'm being accused of on this thread.)

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:45 (twenty years ago) link

can you show me three posts you written directed at chuck where you don't impugn the sincerity of his taste?

― James Blount (James Blount), Tuesday, 8 July 2003 21:45 (twenty years ago) link

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