The World Darts Championship

Magnificent. Truly magnificent. The man has a greater sense of the absurdly comic than any number of half-arsed wise asses.

Last night - Steve Duke got my vote cos he looked nice and avuncular. Though Esses was hilarious; dartitis with the look of a slightly camp bouncer.

Mervyn King - the Gods of Dutch darts will make you pay for your gamesmanship against Rick Hofstra. Last year I said I was bored with Bobby George but he was on good form last night; good analysis of the problems with the laws of darts, nice punditry then classic about Ted hankiey, who according to the dazzler is 'a proper darts player'. Magic.

Taylor - didn't he get found guilty of some sexual assault a year or so back?

Paul Hogan (Eng) v Raymond van Barneveld (Ned, 1)
Robert Wagner (Nor) v John Walton (Eng, 8)
Andy Fordham (Eng) v Tony West (Eng, 5)
James Wade (Eng) v Darryl Fitton (Eng)
Stephen Bunting (Eng) v Ted Hankey (Eng, 2)
Gary Robson (Eng) v Tony O'Shea (Eng)
Steve Duke (Aus) v Ritchie Davies (Wal)
Jarkko Komula (Fin) v Mervyn King (Eng, 3)

Second half of the draw significantly easier to pick than the top half too - based on what I saw last night, King and Davies have no problems, and O'Shea and Hankey ought to get through too.

The top half is much more intriguing, Walton and Barney look probable, but as for the other two it's anyone's guess...

I scored 107 on Saturday.

phil taylor is upset when he scores 107, you see the difference :)

my hand listens not until it's far far too late.

Maybe I have alien hand syndrome.

- Wives and girlfriends of the players not able to watch, preferably being held tight by some other family member
- Foxy female Dutch fans
- Foxy female non-dutch fans
- Krazy and zany male Dutch fans
- Non wanky student high jinks - ie genuine darts fans getting into the Lakeside groove
- Lots of pints of lager being carried on trays with baskets of chips

Things I do not want:

- Aaron Monk (thank you Mr Hankey, the Lakeside poo)
- Talking by anyone in audience except female Dutch fans admitting how they go krazy for English guys who like their darts, yeah for sure, and especially those not actually at the Lakeside OK.
- Stubbsy and the dazzler leaning over a snooker table. NO!!!. April is the Snooker month. Tchoh!
- Aaron Monk

I was quite sad to see "The Matchstick" lose.

Wagner's match tonight against should be very good too.

Also - Stevem = Les 'McDanger' wallace:

haha i liked the sympathetic patronising of bobby george re: the merv the swerv situation ('merv's bang aht of order, lad's just a young boy, just in the country, 'is english ain't too good...'); how's yr dutch, bobby?

The Dazzler for BDO Commissioner in WWF Stylee.

don't spoil the result!

yesterday I caught a bit of the highlights. Godd to see the fans giving mervyn king a hard time.

I can't get into theis tournament at all though, not like the PDC one.

Paul Hogan (Eng) 1-3 Raymond van Barneveld (Ned, 1)
Robert Wagner (Nor) 1-3 John Walton (Eng, 8)
Andy Fordham (Eng) 3-0 Tony West (Eng, 5)
James Wade (Eng) 0-3 Darryl Fitton (Eng)

Barney looked like he was starting to hit stride against Hogan, and is probably favourite - he should certainly get past Walton, who can't hit doubles for love nor money at present.

However, Fordham and particularly Fitton looked to be in top form last night too - their match on Thursday looks like being the match of the tournament thus far.

Barney had double trouble too last night - not as bad as Walton, mind. I'm still thinking you're going to have to beat Barney to win (ie, the winner is going to be Barney or the person who beats him)

I want O'Shea to do well cos he looks like one of the characters from Tintin.

For atmosphere, the King-Komula match was probably the biggest of the tournament thus far. The Dutch contingent, along with several others by the sound of it, are still deeply pissed off with King's conduct in his first-round match. Bobby still reckons he was bang out of order. King's decision to call his detractors 'small-minded people' probably hasn't helped matters very much either.

However - Komula played the part of cult hero to perfection. Looking like Paul Calf's miserable Finnish cousin, he found himself two sets down before swinging it round in an interminable leg where King missed a string of doubles, letting him in for a finish that he hadn't imagined he'd have the opportunity to take. He was so taken aback by this that, for the first time anyone at all could remember, Jarkko Komula smiled. The hall erupted, Komula was suddenly on form, took the leg, then the set, then the set after that... but it couldn't last. King got his rhythm back just as Jarkko lost his and took the final set fairly easily.

Like it or not, King is probably the player who has the most attention now due to his controversial actions. Any match of his is going to have a fair degree of needle to it. Stubbsy and Bobby are dreaming of a Barney-King final... but King's got to get past Davies first, and he's in superb form at the moment. Then, if he does that, he'll have to get through the even-more-in-form Ted Hankey or Tony O'Shea.

The quarter-finals are thus:

Raymond van Barneveld (Ned, 1) v John Walton (Eng, 8)
Andy Fordham (Eng) v Darryl Fitton (Eng)
Ted Hankey (Eng, 2) v Tony O'Shea (Eng)
Ritchie Davies (Wal) v Mervyn King (Eng, 3)

It's hard to see Barney losing to Walton, but other than that this is wide open. Fordham and Fitton are pretty much impossible to separate at present. Hankey won more comfortably than O'Shea this evening, but he really had to work to get through the first round against Colin Monk. O'Shea was also regularly getting in treble 20, and would most likely fancy his chances against anyone. As for King and Davies - both have looked quite solid thus far, but the crowd for their match will be something else...

Last night's action - good matches I thought. Stephen 'future of darts' Bunting blew it when he had double 8 for the second set; as Bobby George might say - he's got the ability to waste, but ain't a proper darter in 'is 'ead yet.

O'Shea - Robson was a good match - both would have been worthy winners, but O'Shea progressed with excellent scoring. I like O'Shea. he falls into my 'looks like a nice guy so i'll support him strategy'. He takes over this mantle from Steve 'The' Duke.

I liked Steve a lot and he was my dark horse in Tony David stylee. I also like his celebration when getting a leg, which mirrors my own (apart from my own being rarely seen obv). His game against Davies was really interesting; all three sets went down to the odd leg in 5. Good ding-dong stuff, which also showed the ups and downs of the game. For example, Steve Duke broke to go 2-2 in the second with a great 144 checkout, and so had the darts for the decider; a wayward first dart upped the pressure and so he didn't punish. Davies had a chance to punish and took it, and so the second slipped away. The two players were very evenly matched in terms of averages and even checkouts, but the crucial difference was in timing. Davies just did what he had to do when had to do it, as opposed to doing it when he should or could have done it - ie, when getting 2-1 up in a set, he won the decider each time, but seemed sanguine about losing the 4th leg for example. Also, when he needed to pressurise Steve, he did. Steve dug out some great legs but his initial waywardness cost him and he was always playing catch up from the start, and Davies was too consistent to get rattled by Steve's dogged pursuit.

No comment on King - Komula as WBS v. OTM.

when they first showed bunter, sorry bunting last night, me and meg both said in unison "he's never bloody eighteen".

also looooooooooook:

http://www.barney.nl

They have proper magazines in Holland! Look! All you could ever need to know about Steve Coote - ever!

Co Stompe

i was trying not to think about whether that was a love bite on hankey's neck (it could be a heat spot caused by excessive nylon shirt wearing or a boil or anything).

also note that gun looks small in andy fordham's hand because he is a GIANT OF A MAN.

also also FAP here: http://www.andythevikingfordham.com/index.php?pageval=biography.php (scroll right to the bottom)

Faints

The rest as they say is history and the story of how The Whippet became The Viking.