are men with beards hiding some facial horror?

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i think they are.

i was dicussing this with my friend the other night, like that presenter who was on channel 4 last night, (the grange hill thing) he had an oddly shaped mouth and spikey teeth, but also a lage beard.....

men with multiple chins need this beard to give the illusion of division between there chin and necks, of which merged many years ago into a chneck, (like rugby players)

............?

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 09:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Wow, he's certainly made an impression, today!

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 09:52 (twenty-one years ago)

i. beards are part of a face (so no)
ii. all faces are hiding the "facial" horror" of what you would look like if yr skin was torn off (so ok yes but no more than anyone else)

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 09:53 (twenty-one years ago)

beards are only a part of a face if you so choose to grow them, and how much you choose to grow them (i.e. the length) denotes how much horror there is to hide.....

although there are some exeptions to the rule.

(a guy i went to uni with always had a beard and one day it was gone, he was bored and shaved the whole thing off... to my surprise- no burning, no scarring, no weird moles, no double chin, etc..... in fact very smooth skin.....)

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 10:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Chester: "Say, fella, I used to hav a beard just like yours, but when I saw how ugly it was, I shaved it off."

Rodney: "Right. Well I once had a face as ugly as yours, sir, but when I saw how ugly it was, I grew a beard. raha. rahaha. ha."

― diedre mousedropping and a quarter (Dave225), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 10:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Then there's the "upside down face syndrome", which is when a balding person grows a beard and so they have more hair at the bottom of their head than at the top.

― andyjack (andyjack), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 10:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I rocked the upside-down face in college because I shaved my head but never shaved my face.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 10:48 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ghost of A Tonsured Wookie

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 10:53 (twenty-one years ago)

botched facelift here

― strng hlkngtn, Wednesday, 11 May 2005 10:53 (twenty-one years ago)

My guy has a beard, and a quite lovely face beneath it. He likes it b/c he thinks it makes him look older. I like him either way.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:09 (twenty-one years ago)

My beard hides a face that hurts when it gets shaved, duh.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Mine also has a beard, and his face is fine. He just doesn't like to shave because yeah, OUCH, but he doesn't like to be scruffy and stubbly either so decided to go for the full beard.

― Archel (Archel), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:13 (twenty-one years ago)

battlingspacemonkey you'd grow a beard if you could!

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:18 (twenty-one years ago)

My beard hides a face that cannot turn into a heart.

― The Ghost of Chris (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:18 (twenty-one years ago)

doglatin your so right im just jelous cause im a girl- one day when im a woman i might get facial hair, and then i can get food stuck in it and you can stare mesmerised by its space -like quality on my face.

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I look like I've just been fired for an alcohol problem when I let my stubble get over two days length, so I'm scared to go all the way through to a beard level.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:22 (twenty-one years ago)

The beard hides the lack of a soul.

― Leon Federline (Ex Leon), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:23 (twenty-one years ago)

I know I'd grow a beard if I could but every time I try it gets patchy and wispy and I look like my Dad. So right now I'm just settling on crap sideburns.

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:24 (twenty-one years ago)

i had a teacher in high school who grew a beard over the lower half of his face because he'd been scarred in a housefire. i'm not sure how he was able to grow hair over scarred skin, though.

― sugarpants: baby's face on football! (sugarpants), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:26 (twenty-one years ago)

he was also pretty popular with the students, but i don't know if this was related or not.

― sugarpants: baby's face on football! (sugarpants), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:27 (twenty-one years ago)

thats it im taking hormone cream and im gonna do an experiment and become doglatins bearded girlfriend.

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:28 (twenty-one years ago)

once of us will have a beard

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Someone's attempt at hitting on you that spectacularly succeeded

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't grow teh beard.

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:29 (twenty-one years ago)

to be fair i liked teh grabby claw....... :-P

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Hi Kelly!

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:35 (twenty-one years ago)

HI CHARLIE

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:37 (twenty-one years ago)

anyway back to the beard i must grow it in order to test my theory....

or whatever......

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:38 (twenty-one years ago)

im really starting toi wonder what id look like with a beard

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:51 (twenty-one years ago)

My beard = my enemy. I do not allow it to live.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.showhistory.com/barnell.jpeg

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:00 (twenty-one years ago)

hahahahaha great picture

after all i have decided against the beard idea, mwhahahahaha

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:07 (twenty-one years ago)

i've been thinking lately about shaving mine.

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:29 (twenty-one years ago)

this beard hides a horrible secret:

http://www.greatseats.com/artist/hank_williams_jr/images/artist_image.jpg

jaymc, i think you look better without one.

― hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:32 (twenty-one years ago)

try it you might like it. if not you can always grow it back.....

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:33 (twenty-one years ago)

really? so many ppl say i look better w/it.

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:36 (twenty-one years ago)

then again i barely remember myself what i look like w/o it.

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:36 (twenty-one years ago)

no way dude, i think you look better with a clean-shaven thing goin' on. suits your style more. i dunno why i think that, but i do.

― hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:37 (twenty-one years ago)

crap, I forgot to shave today. I usually let the stubble grow for a while then hack it. Should do it soon.

― miccio (miccio), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:41 (twenty-one years ago)

grow it you might like it.....

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:47 (twenty-one years ago)

ph3ar my patchy, short-ish beard!!

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:52 (twenty-one years ago)

i hate beards.

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, can't say I'm a fan either.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:55 (twenty-one years ago)

b-but it hides the horrors!!

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:56 (twenty-one years ago)

No, it magnifies them. Trust me.

― Leon Federline (Ex Leon), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:58 (twenty-one years ago)

leon wears a facial horror mask over her secret inner beard

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

to me, this thread is like a red flag to bull.

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 15:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I recently shaved mine off, but felt weird without it so I let it grow back. Now it needs a trim. I wanna get rid of it for summer, but I'm too lazy to shave but once a week or less.

― diedre mousedropping and a quarter (Dave225), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 15:11 (twenty-one years ago)

I like jaymc without a beard quite a lot. I like myself a lot better without that stupid goatee, too. Facial hair is only for the young and pretentious or the old and tenured. I say, be neither!

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 15:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I could never do any kind of manicured beard but I have to be given financial or sexual motivation to shave every day. and my girlfriend seems to like a little stubble.

― miccio (miccio), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

my beard is cyclical. it grows for about 3-6 weeks, then i shave. so am i like, periodically not ugly? or am i just forgetful? "oh shit, i forgot i'm ugly! damn, better grow it back."

or are my razors quarantined in customs or something? or in $99.99 + shipping and handling tv commercial hell? "please allow 3-6 weeks for processing."
m.

― msp (mspa), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

My beard covers up the fact that I currently have no real reason to shave. That's just extra work I ain't into.

The only problem is that growth makes me look fat, since it erases all chin/neck definition. So I probably ought to start shaving semi-regularly again.

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 17:42 (twenty-one years ago)

OTM. After letting mine grow out for a couple of months, I suddenly look 15 lbs. lighter after trimming it.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 17:45 (twenty-one years ago)

haha, i was actually going to say that i'm afraid of shaving because i've put on some weight in the last two years and i fear the clean-shaven look will expose a fat face!

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 17:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I've been sporting a beard the past few months.

I have no horrors to hide. My beard just exudes even more inner love, that's all.

― donut debonair (donut), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 17:55 (twenty-one years ago)

shave it, jaymc!

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 18:39 (twenty-one years ago)

ok ilx i trust you!

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 18:42 (twenty-one years ago)

I have never seen my father without a beard. Ever. What horror is he hiding under that hair?

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 18:43 (twenty-one years ago)

My friend has always had a long pointy, goaty beard- I just noticed that its length is a defensive shield that protects his rather weak chin from being obvious- he's quite handsome with beard, and I sense that without it he wouldn't be.

― Drew Daniel (Drew Daniel), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 19:06 (twenty-one years ago)

My dad grew a beard recently. I hadn't seen him in about a month and suddenly he walked past me in the street and looked right at me and for a couple of seconds I was like "who is this menko?" and almost walked right past him without noticing. It makes him look about 80. I disapprove.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 19:55 (twenty-one years ago)

a friend of mine in his 50s shaved his regular beard about 8 months ago. he looked gaunt. it really hid the thinness of age. his wife had never seen him without a beard and demanded he grow it back. (they had only been together for about 3 or 4 years... second wife and all...)

funny tho.
m.

― msp (mspa), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 20:02 (twenty-one years ago)

The first year of my beard I actually used to shave it every couple months and then let it grow back (it grows quickly), but I haven't done that since right around this time of last year.

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 20:41 (twenty-one years ago)

i think its pretty commendable that nobody has posted pictures of posh spice or katie holmes to this thread.

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 20:51 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah katie holmes would be double-appropriate, considering she's a) tom cruise's gf, and b) has facial horror of her own (teh mouth herpes).

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 20:52 (twenty-one years ago)

http://geoffspws.com/firstwanerpic.jpg

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 11 May 2005 21:53 (twenty-one years ago)

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