Trump, August 2017: A great day at the White House!

What the hell is this "problem solvers caucus" nonsense

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DGJoSPXW0AAcMd-.jpg:small

wired's deadpan game is tight

hahahahaha

xp dude anybody could kick the shit out of trump, he's a mess. kellyanne conway could suplex him. he might have a power obsession that'll make him defer to kelly but the whole "trump as alpha" thing is a figment, literally anybody could flip him.

lots of people think "alpha" means, "somebody who is somehow in charge and likes to yell a lot"

yeah, clearly he's a fat old man who can't walk a few hundred yards without having to stuff his wheezing corpus into a golf cart, but he def thinks of himself as physically powerful - look at his ridiculous handshake-pull manoeuvre

But think of all that potential energy he's stored up by being completely sedentary for so long. Dude focuses his chi just right and he could hadouken somebody through a wall.

I'm willing to bet just about anyone could give him two for flinching.

president nofap

He was probably that kid who mouthed off until someone threated to fight him, at which point he'd curl up in a ball and urinate and vomit all over himself and send the other kids reeling back in disgust.

(It's an effective technique, let me tell you.)

has anyone done any research to see how many holes of golf he actually plays? I keep thinking it can't be more than six

Iirc he usually does 18 holes in around 30 strokes, and then spends the rest of the day traversing the potomac.

He was probably that kid who mouthed off until someone threated to fight him, at which point he'd curl up in a ball and urinate and vomit all over himself and send the other kids reeling back in disgust.

― Chock Full of Love and Sexy Feeling (Old Lunch), Tuesday, August 1, 2017 10:50 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

feel like he's more Sgt Bilko, screaming "hold me back!!"

Itt bad fan fiction about a president

I think his "great day" tweet was sposed to refer to... what? He decorated some Vietnam hero yesterday who somehow consented to receiving his medal from Yam. Maybe that's all.

only pissed himself once iirc

they vanquished the angry man who was getting more television screentime than him

has anyone done any research to see how many holes of golf he actually plays? I keep thinking it can't be more than six

― mh, Tuesday, August 1, 2017 9:54 AM (sixteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dude drives his cart over the green to avoid walking more than 5 feet at a time, so he probably can play at least 9

His "great day" tweet is probably just there to fight the general media reporting that last week was "terrible" for him and that the white house is experiencing chaos?

the whole concept of alpha humans is so laughably stupid. you have alphas among animals that travel in packs. outside of that specific system to think of an "alpha" is just to say "I have a crush on the concept of power"

dude is so clueless about "optics", it's incredible. even more incredible is that how he has reacted to Russia stuff hasn't made 100% of people go "uh ok guess there's a There there after all". Like you couldn't try to look more guilty than he has.

― A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Tuesday, August 1, 2017 11:03 AM (nineteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I guess the only thing he could do at this point is look up in the air, whistle and stroll away briskly whenever someone mentions Russia near him.

damn jclc just outed himself as a beta male imo

BG: no problem, old guys blur together.

I don't know if the great-day tweet was specific to anything. I took it more in the spirit of "I love the smell of napalm in the morning." (I actually found it funny, although I'm not sure if that was Trump's intent or not.)

I think 'alpha' is a useful designation at least inasmuch as its adoption as a self-descriptor clearly signals that the adopter is a walking douchenozzle.

damn old lunch just outed himself as a beta male imo

As someone who lives in Hoboken I definitely witness lots of "alpha" posturing among the demographic of losers that have invaded the town.

damn evan just &c &c

i'm a gamma male, don't make me angry

Come at me bro I'm talking about the posers

My t is the lowest of all the t's.

the whole concept of alpha humans is so laughably stupid. you have alphas among animals that travel in packs. outside of that specific system to think of an "alpha" is just to say "I have a crush on the concept of power"

― she carries a torch. two torches, actually (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Tuesday, August 1, 2017 10:23 AM (four minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yeah it's incredibly spurious and not even true for animals, probably one of the most toxic concepts in the world right now

http://content.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,2007250,00.html

OL otm. i think about guys who preoccupy themselves with "alpha"-ness, male masculinity, etc and they're just the most pathetic try-hards.

obv this is mostly from online personalities. i can't say i know anyone irl who's openly like this

My t is the lowest of all the t's.

&c &c on t's

i am the Omega Man

My t is the lowest of all the t's.

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BMTQ5Nzg2MTgwMl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNTA0NjcxMw@@._V1_UY317_CR0,0,214,317_AL_.jpg

"Hmm, I am going to have to think about whether or not that is something to brag about."

personally I try to model all my personal and business dealings on alpha, the ultimate mutant

I eat Alpha Bits for breakfast.

This WaPo story is thankfully blowing all the way up, it seems. Trump's the dude who abruptly turns the getaway car around so he can tell the police that he and his masked companions definitely had nothing to do with that bank robbery. Just a perpetual series of needless self-owns with this guy. Again, I have approximately zero understanding of how this ludicrous dope didn't wind up homeless or dead long before he bumblefucked his way into the presidency.

being born rich has some benefits iirc

FoxNews is all over it! "HEAT’S ON DEBBIE: Wasserman Schultz facing mounting pressure to testify in IT investigation" oh wai

subheader: "BIAS ALERT: Liberal news outlets work overtime to hide a huge Democratic scandal"

It takes a lot of work to not report this stuff

NICE DAY OUTSIDE: Extremely pleasant weather, picnicking a near certainty, nothing else really happening at the moment.

LA LA LA: Can't hear you, not listening.

nonsense all of you, he's a picture of health

http://static2.businessinsider.com/image/581533b1b28a644d008b5c60-480/kellyanne-conway-donald-trump.jpg

tbf most of Fox's subheaders are horrible tragedy/crime reporting - mother finds son dead in car wreck, grandma guns down intruder, paroled rapist murders dog etc

the world is a bad and scary place and we need harsh legislation to keep us afloat

also all the crime-doers are on public assistance

From reddit:

[–]Juicewag 14.1k points 21 hours ago

Mooch timeline-
1. Sells company to take WH job
2. Doesn't get job
3. Finally gets job
4. Tells the world Bannon sucks his own dick
5. Wife files for divorce
6. Misses childbirth
7. Fired

[–]WeightlessSupreme 8953 points 20 hours ago

8. Business cards arrive today

I'd rather have General Zod running this country right now

say what you like about general zod but at least he has experience of leadership

heckuva job trumpie

thank god every previous president had constant positive media coverage, imagine the litany of self-harm

he's right tho, the best thing to do when your actions upset people is just to keep ploughing on while making a conscious effort to tune out their complaints

Eric Trump has argued his father is forced to block out negative media coverage because fully engaging with it would lead to depression or even suicide.

Going to spend the next week in the middle of a circle of candles chanting "engage... engage... engage..."

qlitany of self-harm

*forms one-man DSBM band, gets ton of press coverage that isn't really commensurate with the quality of the material*

ok that fuckin first q doesn't belong, rip my good joek

qlitany is my stripper name

I think qlitany adds a certain touch of wokeness

Stang Gorka everyone

when you've gotta save western civilization from the invading hordes but you can't parallel park pic.twitter.com/LY2QB9gNlT

— Kilgore Trout (@KT_So_It_Goes) September 1, 2017

Eric Trump unsurprisingly doesn't seem to know his father very well. I couldn't see Donald Trump ever committing suicide. But there's always hope.

time for a new thread?

hard lol at gorka's car/parking, that's incredible

I started this

Trump, September 2017: Walmart Knockoff Hats and Other Indignities